Everyone Has A Story
by A Thing For Brothers
Summary: Sequel to Protect Me. Carl Waits' sidekick is now finishing what he left off. Among additional stress, Carl's mother is trying to get him to understand her son better. With all the stress, will Jake succeed in leaving Charlie a changed person? Finished!
1. Release Your Hold

**Hello everyone! This is the sequel to Protect Me. I hope you'll like this one as much as the first, if not more. I am excited to get this started and am very open to ideas because I don't have many details planned out for the story. Any ideas are welcomed!**

**To my You Can't Hide The Truth for Long readers, the challenge about the significance of the number 41514 is still up. I just ended up finishing the chapter before I got any questions. Plus, the private messaging is probably down again, so if you have a guess as to what that number means, leave it in a review.**

**The title of the chapters are all going to be from a poem I wrote about how Charlie was feeling after Protect Me. The lines won't always pertain to the chapter, but that's not its goal. It's more to reveal the poem. There are 25 lines, including the title, which is this chapter's title. I don't know if I'll have that many chapters, but I plan to have the whole poem in the last chapter of the story. I hope you like it!**

Don stopped by Charlie's house late one night after work. He couldn't keep himself awake long enough to go to his apartment. He'd put in an ungodly 40-hour shift. He'd managed to fall asleep for maybe an hour of it. Don figured it was only allowed to happen because his family was out of town.

Charlie and their father had planned a short trip to New York. Alan had friends there he'd like to visit and Charlie was a guest lecturer at NYU. They were going to be gone a week, but they'd left three days ago.

Don first went into the kitchen to get something to eat and drink. He found some lunch meat that probably would have gone bad if he hadn't gotten to it anyway.

He had just finished making the sandwich when loud moaning startled him into grabbing his gun.

He listened for it to sound again. Someone moaning in this house was not right. Even if it was an intruder, they shouldn't be moaning like that. It gave an eerie effect to the house, making it feel as though it was haunted.

Don felt fear for his brother. If someone had entered his house, was it related to Carl Waits? Ever since his brother had gone through that horrible ordeal, Don feared something else like it would happen. Surely it wouldn't happen twice, would it?

Don traced the noise to Charlie's room. He held his gun out in front of him as he slowly entered the room. He found the source of the moans lying on the floor face-down. The head of curls was too recognizable.

"Charlie! What the hell are you doing here?" Don holstered his gun and dropped to the floor beside Charlie.

He turned his brother over and found his brother was extremely feverish. Charlie's eyes never focused on him, as though they couldn't see through the fog that clouded his eyes.

"Damn it, Charlie. How long have you been like this?" Don asked as he returned Charlie to his bed.

"D-Dad left," Charlie suddenly said, making Don think that he was actually aware of his presence.

"I see that. Wait here. I'll get you some medicine."

Don came back with liquid cold medicine for Charlie to take.

"Come on, Buddy. You need to get better, okay?" Don propped Charlie up on his pillows and handed the medicine over to his brother.

Charlie downed it quickly, but gagged on it as it went down his throat.

"Poison," he choked.

Don laughed. "No, this is going to make you better. Get some sleep, okay?"

Charlie shivered and fell against the bed. "Cold, Donny."

"Okay. I'll get you another blanket."

By the time Don came back with the blanket, Charlie was asleep. He smiled at his little brother as he covered him up.

He went back downstairs to eat his sandwich. He considered calling their father to find out what had happened, but he knew if he did that it would ruin Alan's vacation. So, he decided against it.

Overcome with tiredness, Don went up to his old room, but not before considering getting in his father's much larger bed. He went to his bed, though, and fell asleep before he could even take his shoes off.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Don first went to his brother's room when he woke up. Charlie was sound asleep, tossing around in his bed. Don placed his hand on his brother's forehead. He was still warm.

He went downstairs and read the directions on the medicine bottle. It had been long enough for Charlie to take another dose. He hated to wake him, though.

Don waited until after he'd cleaned up to give Charlie his medicine. He went to Charlie's room before he left and brought the bottle with him. He figured he'd leave it on Charlie's desk in there so he could take it if he needed more.

"Hey, Buddy. Wake up. Charlie?" Don shook Charlie's shoulder and soon he looked blearily up at his older brother.

"Hmm?"

"You need to take some more medicine. Sit up."

Charlie weakly tried to push himself up, but wasn't able.

"Here." Don grabbed Charlie by the upper arms and pulled him up so that he was resting against the headboard.

"Take this." Don handed over the cup of medicine. Charlie managed to get it in his mouth, but gagged on it as it went down and coughed it up... right on Don's white dress shirt.

"Sorry," Charlie said quietly.

Don shook his head. "It... it's okay. I needed to change at my apartment anyway. Should we try again?"

Charlie shook his head, too miserable to want to bother doing anything but sleep. He coughed again, but no red liquid came up this time.

"Are you going to be okay by yourself?"

"I... have been for three days now."

"Yeah, and I found you moaning on the floor. I left the phone by your bed here on your desk. The medicine is here, too. If you need me for anything, call me, okay?"

"That's what I was doing."

"What? When?"

"I got up to call you. I stood up, and then my legs gave out. That's why I was on the floor."

"Aw, Charlie. I'm sorry, Buddy."

"I promised Dad that I'd call you if I needed anything."

"What did you need?"

"Help."

Don felt fear in his stomach. "What... what kind of help?"

"I needed medicine. I couldn't get downstairs. I haven't changed in two days. I haven't eaten in two days."

"Oh, Charlie! Why didn't you say something sooner?"

Don rushed downstairs and heated up a can of condensed soup. He was surprised he found any in the house. If Charlie hadn't eaten in two days, it probably meant he hadn't had anything to drink either. He found a bottle of orange juice. That would be just the thing.

Don brought the tray of food up to his brother. He had even laid out some crackers, too, in case Charlie was still hungry. He was surprised to find Charlie asleep already, though. He groaned.

Don set down the tray on the desk and went to Charlie. "Wake up, Buddy. You have to eat something."

Charlie jerked awake again and looked miserably at his older brother. He didn't want to eat. He wanted to sleep.

"Eat it," Don said sternly as he set the tray in his brother's lap.

Charlie picked up the spoon and blew on the soup before he put it in his mouth. His stomach growled, reminding him how long it had been since he'd eaten. Charlie knew he should have made more of an effort to eat, but he'd barely moved in three days. Sleep was about the only thing he did.

"Now, can I be sure you'll eat this or should I stay to make sure you do?" Don asked.

"I'll eat it," Charlie responded hoarsely.

"Okay. Get feeling better. I'll call to check on you this afternoon. I don't know if I'll be able to come over, but I'll try."

"Bye."

Charlie watched his brother leave and felt the normal attack of fear speed his heart rate. For months Charlie had hidden that fear from his family. He had become a capable actor. When he was left alone, he'd put on a smile, make up a few lines on what he'd do, and never let on how terrified he was.

He wasn't afraid so much of being alone as he was of what happened when he was alone. His mind acted like the Grand Canyon, and every word ever spoken to him by Carl Waits echoed on and on. Charlie was a haunted man and he was haunted by a dead man.

Charlie quietly ate his soup and even managed to eat a few crackers. The juice felt good going down his throat. He decided he should take some medicine and he somehow was able to swallow the disgusting medicine.

After finishing his meal, Charlie fell into a deep sleep, one that wasn't disturbed until his brother called, scaring him half to death.

Charlie jumped at the sound of the phone ringing next to his ear.

"Hello?" Charlie said as he took a deep breath to calm his nerves.

"Hey, Buddy. You okay?"

Charlie sighed with relief when he his brother's voice.

"Hi, Don. I'm... I'm okay, I guess."

"That's good. Did you eat?"

"Yes."

"That should help. Well, I gotta go already, but I just wanted to make sure you're okay. You are, right?"

"Right."

"Okay. I'll talk to you later, Buddy."

"B-" Charlie couldn't get the word out before Don hung up on him.

Just as well. He collapsed back into the pillows and soon was back to sleep.

The next awakening was not a pleasant one.

_"You killed me."_

_This time the voice came with an image. Carl Waits hovered above him, standing on the edge of his bed. He couldn't be here. It wasn't possible._

_"I-I-I'm sorry."_

_"Sorry won't cut it. I'm going to make your whole family so sorry you won't recognize them. Maybe I'll pay a visit to your friends too. Amita looks like she'd be fun to play with."_

_"No! Leave her alone!"_

_Carl laughed, the laugh that still haunted Charlie today. "Haven't you learned by now? No means yes to me."_

_Images of Carl hitting Amita with a two-by-four until she went limp showed plainly in front of Charlie. Her screams scared him, and he screamed, too, for he was feeling the pain too._

_It continued like that with all the people who matter in his life. Charlie could barely bear it when Don cried out his name, as though there was a way for him to save him. Charlie wished there was a way, but he was bound to his bed._

_"You're next, Eppesy," Carl said and raised the board over his head. The moment the board began to come down, Charlie screamed._

Charlie awoke to his own scream, and it continued even after he was out of the dream.

"Oh, God." He doubled over and held onto his stomach as he weakly made it to his bathroom and lost what little he'd eaten.

Charlie gagged on the bile and waited for his stomach to calm. It didn't when he heard the voice behind him.

"Hey, Eppes."

Charlie gasped and turned around quickly. There was no one there, but he could swear he felt a presence with him.

"Wh-who's there?" There really was no point in asking. He knew the voice, could never forget it.

"Come to the window, Eppes."

Slowly he did. When he looked out into his backyard he saw that it was dark, raining, and someone was out there.

Moving toward the person in an almost hypnotic trance, Charlie left his room and went out into the storm.

The rain hit him hard, but he barely blinked when it drenched him. It didn't matter. He had to get to this person. He could see him clearly now, and even though he was terrified, he kept walking toward him.

He stood face to face with Carl Waits. With one wicked smile, Carl managed to terrify Charlie.

He screamed.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Don came home late again that night. He could have just worked through the night, but he was worried about Charlie. He came in through the kitchen and was startled into grabbing his gun again.

Someone was outside. Seeing that it was Charlie, Don cursed quietly, knowing that one of these times he would end up accidently hurting his little brother.

It was pouring outside, so Don knew he had to get his brother inside quickly. There was no reason for him to be out there. Holding his jacket close around him, Don went out into the rain.

Charlie was staring intently at something Don couldn't see.

"Charlie!" Don screamed above the thunder.

Charlie never turned. His breathing became shaky, and the fear swam in his eyes so high that even Don could see it.

"Charlie! What is it? Talk to me!"

Don reached out and grabbed his brother's arm, only getting a scream in return.

"Come on. Come inside."

He pulled on Charlie's arm, but he wouldn't move.

"Fine."

Don bent and lifted his brother and Charlie fought against him. He pointed at the area he'd been staring at before and screamed, "It's him!"

Don didn't know what that meant, but he kept carrying his brother through the rain and into the house. He tossed Charlie on the couch and pushed him down when he tried to get up.

"What's going on? What were you doing out there? You have a cold, remember?"

"It's... it's him. He's out there," Charlie cried and Don noticed that more than just rain had wet his brother's face.

"What? Who is it?"

Even though he knew no one had been out there, Don stole another look outside.

"C-C-Carl." Just saying his name brought on a whimper from Charlie.

Don softened immediately toward his brother. He knelt beside the couch and squeezed his brother's hand.

"Charlie, no. He's gone, Buddy. He won't hurt you anymore."

Don's throat tightened with emotions at the complete fear that shook his brother. He hadn't heard Charlie talk about Carl in months, so he assumed he had gotten over it. Maybe it was the cold talking, but it was still clear that Charlie was still afraid of Carl.

"Come on. You're going to get worse if you don't get out of those wet clothes."

Charlie shivered and whimpered as the image of Carl flashed in front of him again. He let Don lead him back to his room, but he was terrified.

Don got him a clean set of clothes for him to change into. Charlie could barely do it he was shaking so hard. When he came out of the bathroom, Don was sitting on his bed.

"Are you okay, Buddy?" he asked his little brother.

Charlie shook his head no as another tear slipped down his cheek.

"You want me to stay here tonight?"

"P-Please."

Don smiled. "Okay."

Charlie got into bed and clutched the blankets tightly. He shivered again and he felt Don pat his hair.

"You're okay, Buddy. You're safe."

Charlie closed his eyes, praying that Carl would not be there to greet him in his dreams.

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Don decided to stay with Charlie the next day and took an unusual family day. Charlie was miserably feverish and Don couldn't get the fever to break. His brother complained of being cold, but sweat drenched his forehead. He finally gave up trying medicines, and took all the covers off of Charlie's bed.

Surprisingly Charlie slept through the coldness for a few hours. When he awoke, though, he was less than happy.

Charlie moaned and rolled over so that his face was pressing into his mattress. Weakly he pulled at the cover of the mattress and soon he pulled it off and used it as a blanket.

Don sighed. "Buddy, please don't do that."

He reached out to take the cover from Charlie, but his brother was strong. After a few tugs he got it from him.

Charlie gave a cry when his only source of warmth was gone. He opened his eyes and saw his brother holding his cover.

"Give it back, Donny," he cried as he reached out for the cover.

"I'm sorry, Buddy. We got to get this fever to break. If this doesn't work, I'm taking you to the hospital. You already have a fever of 102."

Charlie whimpered and closed his eyes. He pressed his face into his pillows and realized there were covers to them.

"Charlie," Don said in a warning tone when he saw his brother raise his head from the pillows so he could take off the pillow covers.

"Don't do it," he warned again. Surprising him, Charlie tore the cover so that it was flat and covered himself up with it.

"Dad is not going to be happy about this." Don took the pillow covers from him too.

"No!" Charlie said in a whiny voice.

"Sorry."

Charlie felt tears falling from his eyes and he moaned.

Don got up and got a wet wash cloth to put on Charlie's forehead. When he tried to come close, Charlie pushed him away.

"Come on, Buddy. Let me put it on."

When he succeeded, Charlie hissed. "That's cold!"

"I know, but it'll help. Once the fever breaks you won't be cold anymore."

Charlie gritted his teeth, fighting the cold he'd had to deal with before and now the extra cold that froze him.

He turned on his side, attempting to go back to sleep. He glared up at his brother.

"You're mean, Donny."

Don sighed. "I know."

Don reached out and stroked his brother's arm. "I'm sorry I have to be so mean, but I need you to get better. Go back to sleep now, okay?"

Charlie nodded, feeling some what better toward his brother.

He was still cold, though.

**Well, that's not extremely long or anything, but it's definitely a start. I hope you liked it! When Charlie's more in his right mind, I'll talk about Janet Waits more, okay?**

**I will be starting school next week, so I'm going to try to get as many chapters in that I can. I hope it'll be a lot!**


	2. My Past Takes Hold

That night Don was exhausted. He had hardly slept after he had found Charlie outside in the rain. He managed to get a shower and dried off and then sat in a chair beside Charlie the rest of the night.

When his brother remained so feverish, Don knew he had to change that fast. He was relieved when the fever began to lower once he had removed all blankets from his brother's bed. He knew Charlie had been cold, but he needed to break the fever.

Now he laid on his old bed and groaned when he found that one annoying spring that even now poked at his back. He moved to the area he had come to know didn't have any springs to poke him and settled there for the night.

"Don? Donny? Wake up."

Don peeled open his eyes, feeling still groggy. He looked up at his father, surprised to see him there.

"Dad? What are you doing here?" Don sat up and rubbed his eyes.

"Your brother called me the day before yesterday. Considering how his incoherent he sounded, I figured I had better get back here. I'm glad you came over, though. Thank you for that."

"Yeah, sure. No problem. How is Charlie?"

"He's sitting at the table eating oatmeal at the moment. Anything I can get you?"

"No, I guess I better get to work," Don said as he read the clock.

"Are you sure? Breakfast is the most important meal of the day," Alan said cheerfully.

Don smiled. "I'm sure. I'll just get a quick shower and be out of your hair."

"Don't talk like that. You know you're welcome here."

"Good thing, too, or I would have been kicked out a few days ago."

Don went into the bathroom and cleaned up, wearing the same outfit he had on the night he found Charlie outside since he had washed it while he wore some of his Dad's clothes.

Charlie was still sitting at the table when Don came downstairs. He smiled when he saw his big brother.

"Hey, Don!" he called.

"Hey, Buddy. Feeling better?" Even though he could see by the natural color in Charlie's face, Don still placed the back of his hand on his brother's forehead for a moment to be sure that there was no fever there.

"Yeah, thanks to you apparently." Charlie smiled up at his brother.

Don lowered his voice. "We need to talk some time, okay? When you get feeling better, we can. No rush."

"Um, okay. Is everything all right?"

"That's what I want to find out. I'll see you later, okay?"

"Okay."

Charlie felt a knot of fear form in his stomach. Had he said something in his delirium that would let Don know about the letters?

The letters began a few months ago, shortly after he had killed Carl. They were sent by a woman named Janet Waits. Assuming it must be a relative of Carl, he didn't want to have anything to do with the woman. He hadn't opened the letters, just kept them in an old shoe box under his bed mixed in with some other miscellaneous items so they could be concealed.

With the first letter, Charlie had planned on opening it when he could, but he never did. He was never going to be ready to open those letters. He didn't want to hear from this person. He didn't want to go through it again, didn't want to relive it.

No one knew about the letters but him and the woman who sent them. That's the way he planned to keep it. If Don knew, he'd get too involved. Charlie didn't want this to become a big deal. Eventually the woman would leave him alone. She had to.

Charlie shivered, not knowing his father was coming into the dining room at that moment.

"You okay, kiddo?" Alan came up behind his son and laid a hand on his shoulder.

"Hm? Yeah, I'm okay."

"Are you sure?"

Alan looked into his son's eyes, looking for any hint that he was lying.

"It's okay, Dad. I just was cold. I'm fine."

"You should probably go back to bed now that you have some food in you. It was nice of your brother to come over and take care of you."

Charlie smiled. "Yes it was. I wouldn't be better now if it wasn't for him."

"Oh? I guess I owe him an even bigger thank you. Think we should have him over for supper tonight? Are you up for that?"

Charlie slowly nodded, though he was afraid that if Don came over tonight he'd want to talk to him. What had he unknowingly done?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Don wasn't sure what he could say to his brother. Charlie had been sick, delirious with fever when he had talked about Carl. It was just a cold talking, right? But Don knew better. The cold had just caused Charlie to be more honest. He knew that his little brother was still scared of Carl Waits, even though he was dead.

Don couldn't let Charlie be haunted by this man. It had been too long. He understood it took time to get over killing someone, but Charlie shouldn't still be afraid of the man he killed. He needed help, and that's where Don decided he came in.

He wasn't sure what he would tell their father. He didn't think Alan needed to know, but if Don needed his help, he wouldn't hesitate to ask for it.

Don came through the front door of Charlie's house and saw his Dad sitting on the couch.

"Hey, Dad. Supper ready yet?"

"No, not for a while. How are you?"

"I'm good. You?"

"Fine, fine. Your brother is upstairs in his room if you want to see him."

"Yeah, I was wondering where he was. Call us when supper is ready, okay?"

"I will."

Don jogged up the steps to his brother's room. Charlie was stretched out on his bed asleep. Don hated to wake him, but he needed to talk to him.

"I'm awake," Charlie whispered, startling Don.

"I thought you were asleep!"

Charlie opened his eyes as he pushed himself up on the bed. "No, I was just trying to go back to sleep."

"Oh, sorry."

Charlie looked away and licked his lips in a nervous gesture. "So, um, what was it you wanted to talk to me about?"

Don walked over and sat on the edge of his brother's bed and sighed. "Charlie, are you... are you still afraid of Carl Waits?"

Charlie wasn't expecting that question. What had he said about Carl? What had he gotten himself into?

Knowing there was no point in lying to his older brother, Charlie sighed. "Yes. Yes, I'm scared of him."

Don was pleased with his brother's honesty. "Okay. But why? Charlie, he's dead. He's not going to hurt you anymore."

Charlie looked down at his hands. "I-I know. It's just..."

"Just what, Buddy?" Don laid a comforting hand on his brother's shoulder.

Charlie looked up at his brother with tear-filled eyes. "He's every where. I know he's dead, but at the same time he isn't. He's in my dreams, in my head, even in my room. I can hardly go out to the garage anymore. He's out there, Don. He's always there."

Don's throat worked around the lump of emotion lodged there. How could he have not seen how haunted his brother was?

"Buddy, I'm... I'm so sorry."

Charlie shrugged. "I didn't want you to know. It's okay. I guess I was just good at hiding it."

"No, Charlie. Don't hide these things from me. Please. I need to know. You need help, Buddy. You can't do this all by yourself. That's why Dad and I are here."

Don hugged his brother tightly, feeling so guilty. He was the one who was supposed to be good at reading people. When it came to his family, did he just turn that ability off?

"Do you want to talk about it?" Don asked as he pushed back gently.

"No, I'm kinda tired still. Some other time maybe?"

Don smiled. "Sure, Buddy. Whenever you're ready, I am."

"Good."

Charlie laid back on the bed, feeling too tired to talk anymore. But then he heard his father call to them that it was time to eat.

"Sorry, Buddy. Supper time," Don said with a smile.

Charlie groaned, but pulled himself up.

Don put an arm on his brother's shoulder and led him out. "We'll be okay, Buddy. Don't worry."

Charlie nodded, but he wasn't sure he believed what his brother said. Don would be okay, sure. But what about the letters? Would he be okay?

Sitting around the table, the three Eppes men ate in silence until Don spoke.

"So, Dad, why did you leave without Charlie?"

Alan swallowed his bite of chicken before speaking. "Don't make it seem like I abandoned him. He wasn't feeling well so he decided to stay home. I would have stayed with him, but he convinced me to go without him."

"Oh. Did you have a good time?"

"Yes, thank you. Charlie, what did you do when I was away?"

Charlie blushed slightly, knowing his story wasn't a very pleasant one. He'd get yelled at for this. "The day you left I slept 15 hours in a row. The next day I managed to get downstairs and eat something and take some medicine. I crawled back to bed when my strength gave out. Then I wasn't really aware of the next day. After that I knew I needed help, so I tried to call Don but my legs gave out and I spent the rest of the day on the floor until Don came over."

"What?!" Don and Alan exclaimed together.

Charlie went back to eating, not bothering to even give excuses or defend himself. He knew what was coming, and it was coming whether he did anything about it or not.

"You do realize that only once in that story you mentioned eating?"

"And that it wasn't until you were barely aware of what was happening that you chose to call me?"

"What were you thinking?"

"Why weren't you thinking?"

"You could have gotten worse!"

"You could have called me!"

Charlie shook his head as they went back and forth badgering him. He realized he shouldn't have waited so long to call Don, but he hadn't wanted to bother Don. Besides, he had hardly realized what day it was anyway. For all he knew it could have been the day after Alan left. That wasn't his fault. That was the cold.

As if at the same time, Alan and Don softened toward Charlie, knowing that he had been too sick to know any better.

"Are you okay now, kiddo?" Alan asked.

Charlie nodded, glad that they had stopped going through the bickering mode. "I'm okay, thanks to Don. You know me. I don't get colds often, but when I do, they hit hard."

Alan nodded. "You've always been that way."

Don sighed. "I'm just glad you were okay and I came when I did. You scared the life out of me, though, when I heard you upstairs."

Charlie smiled. "Sorry. I had planned to call you to let you know I was staying home, but I fell asleep before I could."

"It's okay. You need to be careful, though, because I had my gun drawn."

The three laughed and ate their supper together. Now that that storm was over, calmness reigned, except for the storm that was brewing inside of Charlie.

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Charlie was thankful he'd had his mail forwarded to his office at CalSci. When he was sick or away from home, someone else might have gotten the mail. What if Don had? He shuddered at the thought.

He flipped through the mail before he entered his home. He was tired after his first day back to school since the sudden cold. He was thankful that he had already planned the time off so his students had expected the change. Thankfully they hadn't seemed to miss a beat.

Charlie came through the front door. He could hear his father in his room, so he stayed down there. A suspicious letter with the word "urgent" stamped across it captured his attention.

What would anyone from the California State Penitentiary want from him?

Charlie opened it, not knowing what effect it would have on him.

**Ooh, cliff hanger! Gotta hate them. I start school in two days. AH! I will have fairly decent breaks on M/Ws so I should be okay for a while. I'm taking Trig, though, so it's going to kill me. Wish me luck! I'll try to update asap!**


	3. Of My Mind So Tight

"Charlie!" Alan screamed to his son when he heard him running downstairs. Something was wrong. He could feel it in his bones. Something had happened. What was it?

Alan ran down the steps after his son, who he found in the bathroom throwing up. There was something in his hand that he clutched tightly in his grasp.

"Charlie? What's wrong?"

Charlie's breathing was so rapid that he was gagging as he threw up. Sweat dripped from his forehead and off his nose. He held himself up by the edges of the toilet, but strength began to escape his body. Fear hit him in waves, and as another hit, he lunged forward.

Alan caught Charlie before he went head-first into the toilet. With one hand he held Charlie up, and with the other he held his son's hair back.

"Hey! Where is everyone?" Don called as he walked through the house. He saw the bathroom door was open and could hear his father's voice. What was going on?

"Whoa," Don said when he came to the bathroom door and saw inside.

"What's going on?" he asked his father, since his little brother was obviously preoccupied.

"I don't know. He just got home and suddenly he was running in here."

Charlie's breath turned rapid again.

"Charlie, calm down. You're making yourself worse." Alan spoke sternly, trying to have more of an effect on his son.

Alan was right. Charlie had to get a hold of his emotions. Charlie knew it, too, but he couldn't calm down. No, not with the news he'd just been given.

Charlie's stomach was already empty, so when his stomach lurched again, only painful bile came up. He spit it out and leaned his head down.

"Come on, Charlie. Let's get you cleaned up," Alan said. He motioned for Don to help him get Charlie up, so Don came over and took one of Charlie's arms to pull him up.

"You okay, Buddy?"

Charlie shook his head vigorously. No. He wasn't okay. Not by a long shot.

Don held Charlie up while Alan wiped his mouth. Charlie was beginning to shake, so Don had to keep a tight hold on him.

"Sh. You're okay," Don said, trying to soothe his brother, but Charlie knew it was a lie. He wasn't okay.

When Charlie was cleaned up, Don led him to the couch. Alan followed close behind and eyed the letter in his son's hand. He couldn't make out the words on it, so he just waited for Charlie to explain.

Don rubbed circles on Charlie's back while his brother held his head in his hands. Charlie shivered when his gaze hit the letter in his hands and suddenly he dropped it, as if he'd been burned.

"Charlie? What's in that letter?"

"I-It's from the California State Penitentiary. J-J-Jake-"

"What? What about him?" That caught Don's attention.

Charlie turned his gaze onto his brother's. "He's been released... on parole."

"What?!"

Don grabbed the letter from his brother's hands and read it. Why hadn't he been told?

Alan moved to his son's side and moved Charlie into his arms as a way to protect his son. Looking back, Alan could hardly believe he had talked to Jake. It scared him how close the man had come to his family. And what he'd done just to Charlie...

"I can't believe this. It's only been four months!"

Charlie didn't want to think about it. Would Jake come after him? He feared so. All this time he had focused his fear on Carl, and he was the one who could never touch him again. But Jake, that was a different story.

"Buddy, I am so sorry. I'm going to get to the bottom of this, okay? If you want, we can file a restraining order against him."

Charlie shook his head. "It wouldn't do any good," he whispered. He knew how Jake had been. He had no morals. He didn't care what he did and how he had to do it. A restraining order would just be one more thing he could break. It would basically be saying, "Come get me."

Charlie leaned against his father. It couldn't be happening. He could deal with the stress and fight against Carl. He could fight a dead man. It was someone who was alive he couldn't face. Would he ever need to?

Don sat down beside his brother and turned him so he could look at him.

"I won't let anything happen to you, okay?"

Charlie nodded, wanting so much to believe his brother's words. But he had let something happen to him last time. What could he do to save him now?

He left the safety of being near his family. Charlie went upstairs and closed the door his room. It couldn't be true. This couldn't be happening.

Jake had been a threat he had some how overlooked. When Carl was gone, Charlie assumed Jake would be too. But Jake hadn't died. He had been in jail. They hadn't been able to connect him directly to any murders, so he wasn't in jail for life. He was already out... and he was probably coming for him.  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Don stared up the steps where his brother had quietly disappeared to. Alan was watching his oldest son and smiled gently.

"Don? Donny, why don't you go up there?"

"No, I-I should go. I need to get home."

"You're already there, son."

Don turned to his father and saw the truth in his eyes. Yes, he was home. That wasn't what he had meant. He meant his house... not his home.

Don sighed as he pushed himself up off the couch. He followed his brother to his room and knocked softly on the closed door.

"Charlie?"

There was no response, but a few moments later, Charlie opened the door. Immediately following, he turned around and went to his bed. He had a small notepad there and was writing numbers. They appeared random to Don, but he knew that with his brother there was a meaning behind those numbers. A meaning he probably wouldn't understand.

"Charlie? Buddy, are you all right?"

Charlie titled his head up, looking away from the notepad for the time being. "Yeah. I'm... okay."

Okay wasn't good. Fine wasn't good. Don knew the words that implied otherwise. Charlie always used them in the same instances, and that was when he wasn't really okay.

"Talk to me." Don didn't bother saying what about or pushing him forward. If Charlie needed to talk, he would.

Charlie shook his head and focused his gaze on a mark on the wall. He'd punched the wall there. He could vaguely remember the day. His mother was still going through chemotherapy. He had been angry with himself because he wasn't able to stop it. Don was coming over that day. He figured his brother would be the one to save their mother, and he hurt himself for being so incapable that he couldn't save his own mother.

"Charlie? Come on. Say something."

"I'm fine, Don. I'll be okay."

Don's face fell when he realized that was all he was going to get out of his brother. He wanted it to be the way it had been, when Charlie always would confide in him. That hadn't been the case for a while. Don hated that. He liked being so close to his brother.

"Okay. If you need anything, call me. You hear?"

Charlie nodded as he continued writing on the notepad. Don rested his hand on Charlie's shoulder, and then got up and left.

Something would need to be done about this. Charlie could not be put at risk. Don would have to protect his brother. He had always felt that he had needed to protect Charlie, but he had failed him last time, so now Charlie was exposed to what it felt like to kill someone. Don never meant for that to happen. It should have been him who had fought Carl. He should have stopped it from happening, saved his brother the trauma of living with the knowledge that Carl wanted him and his family dead. Don could have saved him, but he hadn't. And that failure continued to haunt him every day.

Don took one last look at his brother and pushed the pain and worry down. Charlie would be okay. Jake wouldn't come after him. No, he wouldn't let that happen. He'd take care of him better this time than he had before. No one would touch his brother again. Not without going through him first... and no one would. He'd make sure of it.

* * *

Charlie returned to school the next day. The after-effects of hearing about Jake were still visible on his face. Ever-observant Larry caught on quickly that something was wrong. 

"Charles? Charles?" Larry said as he tried to get his friend's attention. Charlie was only staring at an area on the chalkboard and wouldn't move his gaze from it.

"Charles!" Larry screamed, finally being effective enough to jerk his friend out of his trance.

"Larry! What, what are you doing in here?"

"Well, I couldn't help noticing that something was wrong. I was wondering if I could help in some way."

Charlie sighed and rubbed his temples, trying to work out the constant headache.

"What is it, Charles?"

Charlie looked up at Larry and leaned forward. "Jake has been released from prison on parole."

"You mean the man I saw in your office that one day?"

Charlie nodded.

"Well, no wonder you're upset! I'm so sorry. If there's anything I can do..."

Charlie stood and walked to the board. "No, there's nothing. I'll just have to be on my guard 24/7, not that I hadn't been before. Hopefully everything will work out in the end."

"What are you thinking?"

Charlie turned around to look at Larry. "About what?"

"Anything, but I was thinking along the lines of Jake."

"I think he'll come back. I think he'll try to finish what Carl started."

"Hmm. Now you're making a strange assumption."

"And what's that?"

Larry tapped his chin with his fingers, in thought. "Well, consider Eratosthenes."

"The man who found a systematic way of finding prime numbers?"

"Well, yes, him, but I was thinking along the lines of his more famous work."

"Meaning, the one relating to your field of study, not mine?"

"Precisely. Eratosthenes figured out approximately how far around the Earth is, and despite that, Ptolemy tried to prove him wrong and incorrectly said the earth was 18,000 miles around."

"Rather than the estimated 25,000 miles around. What's your point?"

"If Eratosthenes hadn't decided to take the time to find out how far around the earth is, do you think Ptolemy would have incorrectly proven him wrong?"

"Meaning..."

"Without Carl Waits, Jake may have never bothered you at all. And now that Carl is gone, maybe he won't anymore."

Charlie sighed. "I hope you're right, Larry. I really do."

"As do I, Charles."

Amita walked in and looked at their stoic faces. "What's going on? What are you talking about?"

"Eratosthenes," Larry answered.

"Prime numbers?"

Charlie and Larry smiled at each other. If only it were that simple.

**I know it's not very long, but it's the end of the school week. It's the best I can do. I hope it helped with the cliffhanger. I promise to give you only a few cliffhangers, but I realize it does often gaurantee your return. LOL Have fun, guys! I'll update ASAP!**


	4. Regret Chokes Me

Charlie felt alone when he went to school. Larry had the day off and Amita was giving a lecture. It was rare that he was alone. Trying to get away from his lonely office, Charlie went outside.

There he sat on the brick wall and ate his lunch. He'd nod and smile to those who would walk by him, but rarely anyone stopped to talk. Soon everything calmed down and he was one of the only ones out there.

After finishing his turkey sandwich, Charlie felt a strange feeling, like he was being watched. He looked around, but never saw anyone. He took a nervous sip from his bottle of water and kept alert. He looked around across the street and noticed a familiar looking man. The man saw him watching and their gazes locked.

Feeling a sudden panic, Charlie stood and turned around toward the building. Trying to act casual, he walked at a normal pace for him. He turned around and saw the man running toward him, and he shot forward, moving faster than before.

Once inside the school, Charlie ran. No one was in the halls as he ran to his office. He threw himself inside and then screamed when someone was inside.

"Hey, whoa! Calm down, man!" Colby said as he saw Charlie's face, full of fear.

"Colby!" Charlie gasped, relieved it was him.

"What's going on? Why were you running?"

"There... someone was-was following me." Charlie turned around to look behind him, but his view was blocked by the door.

"Stay here." Colby's protective side toward the younger man came out. He kept his hand near his gun and he stepped out into the hallway.

Returning a moment later, he was shaking his head. "There wasn't anyone out there. Are you sure someone was following you?"

"I-I'm not sure. I was eating lunch when I felt like someone was watching me. Then I saw this guy across the street. He looked at me when he knew I was watching him and then he came running toward me. So I came inside."

"Be careful, Charlie. Okay?" Colby figured it was just an overactive mind talking. But considering what Charlie had been through, he wouldn't cast the concern aside.

"I-I will, thanks." Charlie went to his desk and sat down. He felt scared out of his mind, but he wouldn't let this agent see it. Colby had to deal with worse things during his day.

"So, um, what do you need?" he asked, knowing Colby had come for a reason.

"Don wanted to know if you had those files we gave you for the Donaldson case."

"I'll have to see." Charlie went through some files in his cabinet and pulled out the case. "Why this one?"

"He wants you to look over it again and see if you can make any connections to Raymond Clarks."

"Why?"

"Raymond had the same tattoo as James Porter, who was involved in that case."

"Okay. I-I'll give it a look."

Colby frowned, studying Charlie's movements. "You okay?"

"I'll be all right."

Colby nodded, respecting the younger man's strength. "Okay. Well, I'll get going then. Anything you want me to tell Don?"

"N-no. Not that I know of." To make himself more believably okay, Charlie gave Colby a smile before the agent left.

After the door was closed, Charlie sank into his chair and sighed. He rubbed his temples, fighting away a headache. He shivered at the thought of the man who'd followed him. Was he becoming paranoid, or was there a real reason to fear?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"What?" Don exclaimed when the agent walked into his office and talked to him.

"Charlie... he said he was being followed. I checked myself, but there wasn't anyone there. But..."

"But what? What?"

"Charlie was definitely scared. I don't think he was imagining it."

Don sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. "Is... is he okay?"

Colby smiled with pride. "Yeah. He's pretty tough."

Don nodded. He knew his brother was strong like that, but still. Something like this would definitely have some effects to his day.

"What time is it?"

Colby looked at his watch. "1:15. Why?"

"I'm taking a lunch break."

Colby looked at Megan, who was listening to the conversation. They smiled at each other, both knowing exactly where the agent was going.

Don drove calmly to his brother's office, knowing that it wouldn't look good if he came rushing to him. He didn't want Charlie to think he thought he was too weak to take care of himself. Don just knew that his brother would need a little help, maybe just to calm his nerves. He wouldn't push it. He'd just be there if Charlie needed to talk.

Don even stopped and picked up a couple cheeseburgers for him and his brother, though the meal wasn't something Charlie would normally eat. It was more of a prop for Don, something to show that he was coming out for lunch. It wouldn't make sense to his observant brother. He had just sent Colby to see him and less than an hour later he was coming over for lunch.

But Don didn't care.

He looked into the cluttered office space before entering, hoping to see more of the truth before Charlie saw him coming. However, Charlie was watching the door like a hawk and knew the moment his brother stepped into the doorway.

"Hey, Buddy. I brought lunch." Don held up the bag and smiled. He didn't realize how poor of an actor he was.

"I'm okay, Don. You don't have to come check up on me." There was an underlining to Charlie's words. Don couldn't decide if it was anger, hurt, fear, or all of the above.

Don smiled sheepishly as he sat in front of Charlie's desk. "You know me too well."

Charlie nodded, looking away from his brother... because he knew all too well that his brother knew him, too.

"So. You want to talk about it?"

Charlie shook his head. "No. It... it was nothing, I'm sure. Don't worry about it."

Don leaned forward, surprised that Charlie would even say something like that. "Charlie, after what happened to you a few months ago... I don't think I've stopped worrying about you."

"Really?" That was something the brothers hadn't discussed before. Charlie worried for his family. Before Carl, he had never imagined that someone he knew would want to attack his family. He preferred it when he would be the target. Don's job had put him in the position, but Charlie was the one who had spent time with Carl. It wasn't Don's fault. Was there something he had said to Carl that would make him want to hurt Don and Alan? He didn't think so, but that didn't mean he'd stop thinking about it and blaming himself.

"Of course. Buddy, I always try to look after you. And I really messed up. I can't let that happen again, for you, Dad, or me. So of course I'm going to be worried about you, especially after what happened. Talk to me."

_Talk to me. _Don was starting to get tired of saying that line to his brother. He had been the one closed up, away from everyone. But his brother was a locked vault. It took some time to break into it. Don didn't think anyone had the key, so he had to fight to get inside.

"He... he was watching me. I could feel his eyes on me."

"Yeah? For how long?"

"A couple minutes, I don't know. I-I looked around, but didn't see him at first. Later I did and we made eye contact and... there was something familiar about him."

"Like you'd seen him before?"

"No, not exactly. He just... looked like someone I'd seen before."

Don frowned. He wanted to get as much information out of his brother that he could. He'd look into it if he needed to.

"I don't know. It just... startled me. I don't want to have a repeat of... Carl." He said Carl's name as a whisper.

Don stood and walked around the desk to where his brother was standing. He grasped his brother's shoulder and turned him so that they were facing.

"Charlie, you're not going to have to go through that again. I promise. I'll not allow it. You hear me?"

Charlie nodded, biting down on his lower lip to stop its shaking, the only shaking he could stop.

"You're okay," Don said as he pulled his brother into a hug.

Charlie allowed himself the comfort of his brother's arms. He gave into the trembles and his whole body shook. He pressed his face into his brother's chest, waiting for the trembling to stop before pushing back.

"I'm okay," Charlie said when he stepped out of his brother's embrace.

Don nodded and gave him a small smile. "I know you are." He reached out and gave his brother a short pat on the arm and then held up the bag of food.

"Hungry?"

"Yeah." Charlie smiled and took a burger from the bag and sat down in his desk chair. Don returned to the seat in front of Charlie's desk and ate his burger quietly, though he had just had a sandwich less than an hour before. He watched his brother, wondering if he'd find any sign of fear still there. It seemed that Charlie had pushed past it for now, and he was proud. Sometimes it amazed him how similar their traits were. There was no denying they were brothers.

Before Don left after lunch, he turned to his brother with a serious look on his face. "If you need anything, call me. Okay?"

Charlie nodded. "I'll be fine, Don."

Don smiled. "I know, but still. Anytime, all right?"

"Get outta here," Charlie said with a wave of his hands. Don smiled and left, resting easy with that statement from his brother.

Almost immediately after the door to his office had closed, his phone rang. He picked it up and answered with a friendly "hello."

"Hello, Charles." It wasn't Larry, the only person who normally called him "Charles."

"Who is this?" Charlie asked, feeling his pulse race, making his chest ache.

"Janet Waits."

Charlie's hand was frozen to the phone, otherwise he would have hung it up.

"Look, I'm tired of being ignored, no matter what my son did to you and your family."

His mother? Charlie hadn't expected that.

He turned when he saw movement at the door and Don came back in with a smile on his face. "I lost my keys," he mouthed.

Charlie panicked, not wanting to have this conversation in front of his brother. "Um, can I... can I call you back?"

"I suppose." She sounded confused.

"What's your number?"

Charlie jotted the numbers down in a hurry and hung up without a goodbye.

"Who was that?" Don asked as he searched the floor under the chair he'd been sitting in.

Charlie didn't answer. He didn't know how to explain, how to lie his way out.

"Charlie?" Don looked up and stared at his brother when he didn't get a response.

Charlie dared to look at his older brother, though he really didn't want to. He didn't want Don to be able to tell he was lying.

"Who was it?"

Charlie opened his mouth, but closed it when no sound would come.

"Who was on the phone, Charlie?" His voice rose as he demanded to know who it was. Don could see the effect it was having on his brother. Charlie didn't look the way he had left him only minutes before. Something wasn't right and Don had a feeling it had something to do with the man who had been watching him.

"Answer me, Charlie," Don said in a strict tone.

"I-It was the... doctor." Charlie could hardly believe how he had slipped out the lie. This wasn't something to lie about. If he was getting a call from a doctor, it would have to be serious. What was he thinking?

Immediately Don's face paled and concern shown as bright as the sun in his eyes. "What... why did the doctor call you? Are you all right?"

Charlie sighed, pulling out the acting he'd done in high school. "I am... for sure now."

"What's going on?" Don sat in the chair, unsure he could hold himself up any longer. What was wrong with his little brother? What hadn't he protected him from?

"It... it was no big deal. I just... a mole on my shoulder looked a little weird. I was concerned, so I went to the hospital. The doctors had to run some tests on it to make sure it wasn't cancerous... and it isn't."

Don sighed with relief, but his heart refused to calm. "Why didn't you tell me before? Does Dad even know?"

"No. I... I didn't want to worry you two until I knew for sure. I didn't want you two to have to repeat... last time."

_Last time._ It could have been as bad as last time. But it wasn't. Charlie was going to be okay. Don gave a sad laugh.

"The things you do to me, I swear."

Don circled around the desk and hugged his brother tightly, so thankful nothing had been wrong.

"It's okay, Don."

"It better be." Don wiped at the moisture in his eyes.

"Aren't those your keys right there?" Charlie pointed to a spot under the desk.

"There they are!"

Don picked them up and gave Charlie a smile, a smile that protected him from his brother's observant eyes.

"I'll get going then. You should tell Dad about this. He'll want to know."

"I will." Charlie smiled as his brother waved and left.

Damn it. Charlie hadn't planned on forming such a big lie, but there was no way he was going to tell Don that he was talking to the mother of the man he killed. Not after what had happened today.

He quickly called Janet back, wanting to get this conversation over as soon as possible.

She picked up where they left off a moment later.

"I-I know he put you through a lot, but all I want is for us to meet, face-to-face. I... I have to tell you about him. I can't let my baby be remembered as a tyrant. There... there were reasons for why he was that way."

Charlie could think of none. What could drive a man to kill so many people? He knew about Carl's brother, who hadn't been there to save him. Charlie didn't think that was enough to make a man do that, but he didn't know. He'd always had his brother there to save him.

"Please." The pleading in her voice held just sorrow, and Charlie could see Carl's death in a different light. He had affected someone else, he would be remembered, and he had been loved. Those things were hard to consider happening to such a villain, but Charlie supposed it had to be true.

He sighed. He really didn't want to hurt this woman, a woman he knew very little about. "I can't. Please... just... leave me alone."

"But-"

Charlie hung up before she could get another word in. It was the most he could do at the time. There was nothing else he could say to her, nothing he could give her when her son had taken away so much from him. He hoped she would listen to him and leave him alone.

He went home that afternoon after he was done teaching his classes. His father was reading the newspaper in the living room when he came in and stood when his son came inside.

"Are you okay?"

Charlie was surprised the word had reached his father so fast. He wasn't sure what his father was referring to, so he just replied, "I'm okay."

"Donny told me you got a call from the doctor and that I had to be sure to get the facts from you. What happened? Why were you being called by a doctor?"

Charlie had to conjure up the lie once more. He was thankful he had remembered most of the details so that the stories wouldn't seem so different should Alan and Don discuss it.

"Oh, my boy." Alan kissed his son on the head as he wrapped Charlie in an embrace.

"It's okay, Dad. It was nothing."

Alan hated that his son had kept it from him and had to bear it alone. Had he really wanted to know at the time though? Alan would have spent his days in fear, like he had with his wife. Only this had a much happier ending.

"I'm going to go upstairs, okay, Dad?"

"Sure, sure."

Alan watched his son walk away from him and felt tears come to his eyes. He hadn't lost him. He had a feeling a certain guardian angel had something to do with that.

**I know, it's not very long again, but I have a feeling that's what's going to happen a lot. It'll probably mean there will be more chapters, though! I hope that makes you feel better.**

**I hope you're all enjoying it so far. Like I said, I'm open to any ideas. I do have a dilemma that could use some help with, if anyone doesn't mind any possible spoilers. So, write or review if you're willing to help with that.**

**See you next chapter!**


	5. And I Can't Put Up A Fight

Charlie hated the mess he'd gotten into with the lie about his appointment. Larry and Amita found out and they acted weird around him. He wasn't sick. He told them that, not that he had been in the first place. That was just the lie.

But Charlie didn't want everyone to know. Alan was the one who had ended up telling Larry, who then told Amita. He hadn't expected it to go so far. He could kick himself for not telling Don the truth. He didn't want to do that, but he hated lying even more.

Having not heard from Janet or been followed since the last incident, Charlie started feeling comfortable again. He found it easier to smile and laugh and the tension left his body. Sleep came easier and he found himself being able to walk down the sidewalk without looking over his shoulder every few minutes.

His comfort lasted about two weeks. His brother and father had both noticed the change and they just assumed it was relief over his "doctor's appointment." Charlie wished it could have been that easy, but it wasn't.

Because when his comfort ended, things went right back to the way they had been, except this time he had a lot more anger about it.

It began with just a phone call. Getting many during the day, Charlie didn't think much of this one. He answered it, and when her voice rang in his ears, he knew the peace was broken and he felt the comfort zone shatter from the earthquake that she'd just created.

"What do you want?" he said angrily into the phone.

"A chance. Please. I-I know that judging by what my son did you wouldn't want anything to do with me. But I promise you I'm not like him. I won't hurt you. I just... I just want to talk, to explain why he did that."

"He tried to kill me and my family. I have nothing to say to you." Charlie hung up, hoping that the woman would get the point.

But she didn't. Janet called again and again.

By the fourth time Charlie had hung up on her, he was ready to unplug his phone. He didn't want anything to do with this woman, but she was persistent.

The phone rang again before he had a chance to unplug it. So he picked up the phone and screamed into it.

"Can't you take a hint? Leave me alone!" Charlie screamed angrily.

Don jumped in his chair and held the phone away from his ear when his brother screamed at him. He was just expecting a simple "hello," or maybe even a gruff "yeah." He would have expected almost anything except for what he ended up getting. He was thankful he hadn't put it on speaker, like he had planned.

"Charlie?" Don said when the scream ended.

Charlie froze, dropping the phone in his hand. It couldn't be his brother. He thought that only happened in movies and books. This never really happened did it? But it had happened to him.

"Charlie? Charlie!" Don called over the phone when his brother didn't answer him.

Charlie bent down, regaining his composure. He picked up the phone and brought it back to his ear.

"Yeah, Don?"

"What the hell was that?" Don asked, thankful his brother had come back on the line, but still confused as to why he'd gotten yelled at for no reason.

"Um, it... well it was..."

"Is someone bothering you? What's going on?"

"It's nothing." Charlie got it out in one breath, knowing if he took too long he'd let Don know something was wrong... if his brother hadn't already figured that out.

"I'm coming down there." Don hung up and left his office.

Charlie felt sick to his stomach, not over Janet, but the fact that his brother was coming down to his office because of the phone call. He couldn't lie again, and he knew he wouldn't. There was no point. Maybe he wouldn't tell Don the whole truth, but he definitely wouldn't lie.

He had a good reign on his emotions by the time his older brother showed up. Don looked concerned but he had his tough, big brother face on to hide any fearful concern.

He sat down quickly in the chair in front of Charlie and leaned forward. "Talk."

Charlie took a deep, cleansing breath and complied. "This person kept calling me."

"Male or female?"

"F-female." Don raised an eyebrow, but didn't comment.

"I was expecting your call to be the fifth one, which is why I screamed."

"What did she want?"

"She... she wanted to talk to me."

"Do you know her?"

"Barely. We met once."

"Has this happened before?"

"No." Charlie impressed himself with how confident that answer came out sounding.

"If it happens again, call me. We can file a restraining order if necessary or I can take action against this."

Charlie didn't like the sound of that. "I-It's okay, Don. I don't expect it to happen again."

Don frowned as he concentrated hard on his little brother's appearance. He seemed out of place, frazzled. Something about those calls had bothered him, but Don could hear in Charlie's voice that he wasn't willing to give away more than he already had. Maybe he should calm down and stop looking for ways to save his brother.

"You're okay?"

Charlie nodded.

"Let me hear you say it."

Charlie smiled. "I'm okay."

"Good."

Don gave him a light smile in return, though the concern was still heavily there. That was the second person who showed stalker-like attributes toward his brother. It wasn't normal for this to be happening so close together. Don might take some action against this before anything else happened, whether his brother liked it or not.

"You coming over tonight?"

"Why? You miss me?" Don smiled teasingly at Charlie, happy to change the subject.

"You haven't been over in a while, and you know how Dad gets when that happens."

"Yeah. He's about ready to send out a search party for me."

Charlie could remember a time when that was exactly what it would take to find his brother, or at least when it seemed that way. He shook his head, clearing his mind of those thoughts. His brother was in his life now and that was all that mattered. You can't change the past. At that thought he could have kicked himself. Leave it to him to think of a quote from "The Lion King" at a time like this.

"So? Are you coming?"

Don smiled. "I'll be there, Buddy."

"That's good."

"Remember, if you need anything, call me, all right? Don't wait for me to call you."

"I will."

Charlie smiled as his brother pat him on the shoulder. "I'll see you later, Buddy."

A thought occurred to Charlie as his brother left. Was he denying Don his big brother rights by not letting him protect him? He never asked Don to help him and lately he'd been pretty independent. Was he making Don feel inferior in strength, like he would never call on his big brother because he was stronger?

He and Don had never talked about it after Carl died. Charlie had made it clear that he wanted to protect Don and Alan alone, and that's what he'd done. But from what Charlie could tell, Don was eager to find a way to take care of him, and he was denying Don that right by being self-sufficient.

Charlie never wanted Don to feel weak, or that he was taking care of himself because he didn't think his brother was capable of it.

So Charlie vowed that the next time he was in trouble, he would call on his Superman, his older brother Don.

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Don could hardly believe he'd done it. Charlie would probably be so mad at him if he found out. But he wasn't going to find out. He was too smart for that. He was trained not to be seen. That's why Don hired him.

Would Charlie feel someone watching him? Would he get scared? Don hoped not. He hoped his brother wouldn't be able to notice so easily. It was for his own good. He couldn't have anything happening to Charlie. He wouldn't stand for that. He wouldn't be able to let his father think he wasn't doing his job as a big brother. No, he'd do something about it to prevent Charlie from getting into harm's way.

That's why he hired an agent to watch Charlie for him.

It was only a nighttime deal. That was the more likely time for a predator to attack. In the daytime, Don figured enough people would be around Charlie so that no one would want to strike at him with so many witnesses around. So for those late nights that Charlie would work at CalSci, an agent would be there to protect him. He'd make sure no harm would come to him, or he'd have Don to answer to.

Don just hoped that it would work and that Charlie wouldn't catch on that he was being followed.

If Charlie wouldn't let him protect him, then he'd make sure someone else would.

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Don's hope that Charlie wouldn't catch on that someone was following him at night didn't last long. Only three weeks to be exact.

Charlie enjoyed working late at night. The campus was quiet and there were no distractions. At home his father would come out and check on him, as though he feared Charlie would go back to the his P vs. NP state. Here he could be alone and let the math surround his thoughts and attention.

He was in the middle of grading a student's thesis paper when he heard a squeaking noise on the floor of the hall outside, like a sneaker on the floor. His heart began to pound, knowing that no one should be out at this time, not even the cleaning crew.

He didn't hear the sound again, so he assumed he was okay. Nevertheless, Charlie decided this would be a good time to stop for the night. It was already eleven o'clock anyway.

Gathering his book bag close to him, as though some sort of protective shield, Charlie left his office.

He was mad at himself for deciding to ride his bike today, though the idea had been made with the purpose of getting more exercise. Now it just seemed like a way of asking to get mobbed.

He could call his brother, like he'd promised himself to do the next time he was in trouble. But he didn't know he was in trouble, did he? Besides, Don would probably be working hard. And if he wasn't, he would be getting much-needed rest. Who was he to interrupt?

Charlie got on his bike and peddled hard, hoping he could get home fast. When he had to stop at a cross walk, he looked behind him and noticed a particular car that seemed to be centered on him. Not wanting to waste any time, he peddled across the street before the sign said "walk."

His breathing quickened when the car was still behind him a block later. He didn't know what to do. He couldn't call Don now because he couldn't risk stopping. Charlie was scared and he didn't know what to do about it. He could kick himself for not calling Don because now that was who he wanted to see most.

He nearly screamed when the car was still behind him when he pulled into his driveway. He tossed his bike down and ran in the house, his eyes on the car that still trailed him.

"Charlie!" Don exclaimed as his brother ran right into him. He wrapped his arms around his brother to stop him, but Charlie's force pushed through.

"Charlie, what's going on?" Don saw the trapped animal look in his brother's eyes and he didn't like it. What happened?

"Charlie?" Alan now said. He had seen what happened and now stood from his place in the living room and came closer.

"Someone's out there." Charlie rushed to Don and grabbed the front of his brother's shirt. "Someone followed me!"

Don's eyes held a fire in them as he pushed his brother aside and walked out onto the front porch, hand hovering over his gun.

When Don left, Alan moved to Charlie and wrapped his arm around Charlie's shoulders.

"I-I wanted to call, but I didn't think it was anything. But-but he never let up. He's still out there."

Alan's grip tightened at his son's words. He could not let anything happen to Charlie again. His son had been through enough already.

Don could have kicked himself when he saw the familiar car. It was owned by Agent Derek Lawson, the agent he'd hired to follow Charlie.

"Damn it," he quietly cursed as he stepped off the porch and over to the man in the car.

He banged on the window when Derek didn't roll down the window right away. As soon as it was open a crack, Don let into him.

"What the hell was that? I hire you to protect my brother and now you're the one he's afraid of? My God, and you wanted to go into manhunting? They'd see you coming from a mile away."

"Sir, I-"

"We're done here. There's no use you sticking around. He's already seen you. How incompetent are you anyway?"

Don kicked the tire as he passed by it and stormed back to the house, not even giving the agent a chance to defend himself.

Now he had to explain what was going on to his brother. He sure didn't want to have to do that.

**Well, I was hoping this week would turn out to be easier, but it wasn't. I have three tests to study for and just did homework that took me 3 hours to do. It's awful. Also, I haven't heard from my helpers. If you're reading, guys, write back, please!**

**Well, I hope you're enjoying it still. I'll try to keep up still, but you know how life is. Unpredictable.**


	6. What You Did Haunts Me

Alan watched Don from the window. He knew something was wrong, and it scared him. He briefly looked at his youngest son, who was sitting on the couch with his hands clasped tightly together. Charlie had quickly composed himself, but there was still a note of fear on his son's face. Alan smiled sadly when Charlie looked up at him, then turned back to the window.

Don looked furious. Alan could see his son scream at the man in the car. He was surprised when Don never raised his hand to the man. It made Alan wonder if there was something else going on.

When Don turned back to the house, Alan went to the couch. He put a gentle hand on Charlie's shoulder. Charlie gave his father a smile, hoping it would reassure him that he was okay.

Don wearily walked through the front door. He saw his brother look hopefully at him, and he could hardly bear the fact that he'd have to tell his brother that it was because of him that he went through such fear. How could he have let that happen?

"Did you get him?" Charlie quietly asked when Don remained silent.

"Um, I guess you could say that." Don rubbed the back of his neck in a nervous gesture. "Buddy, I... I have something to tell you."

"What is it, Donny?" Alan asked with concern.

Don sank into the chair across from his family. He looked in between them, unable to make eye contact with either one.

"That man, the man who followed you, he's... his name is Derek Lawson. He's an agent for the FBI."

He let that sink in in their minds, then saw the confusion on their faces.

"I hired him."

Don couldn't look away from his brother now. Charlie's eyes got wide and he looked like he could hardly breathe. His face went pale and he looked straight at his brother, with the gaze Don hated so much. It was the gaze that saw right through him. The one that knew who he really was.

"Why?" Charlie asked in a whisper.

"I was... afraid. I didn't want you to get hurt. So, I hired him to follow you at night, so you wouldn't get hurt. I'm so sorry this happened, Buddy."

Charlie stood and kept his back to Don and Alan. He put his hand over his mouth to stifle a cry that wanted to be released. He was okay. It wasn't someone after him, wasn't Jake. He was fine. It was an agent, someone who was supposed to protect him.

But why couldn't Don have just told him? It would have saved him a lot of trouble. He didn't want to have to be afraid every time he walked outside his home. And he wouldn't have if he knew that there was an agent following him. But thinking that it was someone who was trying to hurt him? That was too hard to handle.

Don stood when his brother wouldn't speak anymore. He walked slowly to where Charlie was standing and talked to his brother's back.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I-I thought you'd get mad and would make me fire him. I... I couldn't do that. I needed to know you'd be safe... since I can't seem to protect you very well."

Charlie turned when his brother spoke those words. "No... you've always been able to protect me. Always."

"Then how come..." Don couldn't bring himself to ask that question.

"How come I haven't been asking you for help?" At Don's nod, Charlie continued. "Because I can't call my big brother every time something happens, every time I get scared. When it turns out to be nothing, I don't want to feel stupid because I couldn't handle it myself. I don't want you to miss time at work because of me, because of a childish fear. It's nothing personal, Don."

Alan smiled as he quietly watched his boys' conversation. They cared too much about each other sometimes because it kept them from getting what they need. They sacrificed too much of themselves for each other. Alan was proud of them for it.

"Are you... mad at me?" Don asked.

Charlie gave his brother a smile at the worry in Don's tone. "No. I wish you would have told me. I wouldn't have made you stop."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

Don smiled. Charlie hugged his brother, thankful that it had just been his brother looking out for him that refused to leave him.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Can any of you tell me the significance of 381654729?" Charlie asked his class.

Silence filled the room. A few students wrote the number down on a piece of paper and you could see the wheels turning for others. Charlie waited patiently with a smile on his face for the students to answer. He knew none would know it this quickly, unless they'd done the problem before.

"Anyone?"

Most students shrugged or shook their heads.

"381654729 is the number divisible by the order it is in. Three is divisible by one, thirty-eight is divisible by two, three-hundred and eighty-one is divisible by three, and so on."

Charlie saw students take out their calculators to check him. He was glad that they wanted to make sure it was right.

"Yes, you will find it is correct."

Some of students who didn't have their calculators out chuckled.

"Your assignment for tonight is to try to find a problem like this one and solve it. I'll see you tomorrow."

Charlie was happy to leave his classroom. He was happy for some time off. He was thankful that tomorrow was Friday because the week so far had seemed endless.

Larry told him that the days are getting longer, but they won't be significantly so for billions of years. Some weeks Charlie could swear that each day was 48 hours. Either that or someone had pressed the slow-motion button.

Charlie rubbed his aching neck as he gathered his things into his book bag. Today he had driven to work, something he had started doing more often. Don agreed that it was a good idea.

He hadn't heard from Janet in almost a week. No one had followed him, that he knew of. His week became stress-free, except for the endless hours he put in at work for CalSci and the FBI.

It was time to go home now, and he was quite happy about it. If he wanted to be really nice to himself, he'd indulge in taking a nap.

When he got out of the CalSci parking lot, he basically had to park once more. There was a traffic jam caused by a car accident. Knowing he'd be stuck there for hours, Charlie pulled back into the CalSci parking lot and took the shortcut he usually used when he rode his bike.

However, he didn't make it very far when he stopped again.

His car was out of gas, which didn't make sense to him since he had just filled it up the day before.

Charlie had made it halfway through the alley when his car stopped. He hadn't even bothered to look at how much gas he had because he knew he had filled it up the day before. He decided this would be a good time to call his brother for help.

"Eppes," Don answered.

"Hey, Don, it's me."

"Hey, Buddy. What's up?"

"Um, I filled up my gas tank yesterday, but right now I'm out of gas. I think someone siphoned out my gas."

Don's jaw line tightened at that thought. "Get out and see if there is anything that would suggest that."

Charlie stepped out of his car and looked at the gas cap. It looked the same way it had before. "No. There's nothing different that I can see."

"What about inside your car? Is there anything missing?"

"There shouldn't be. I keep it locked and it still was before."

"Okay, where are you?"

"I'm in the alley between the laundromat and Georgio's Pizza. Why?"

"I'll come get you, okay?"

"I don't know if you'll be able to make it. There's a huge traffic jam. Someone had an accident."

Was it planned that way, or was Don just being paranoid?

"All right. Go back to CalSci, get some work done or something. I'll come get you as soon as I can, okay?"

Charlie turned his head at the sound of a car coming over. "Someone's coming. Maybe they can help?"

"Charlie, get back in your car and lock the doors. Now!"

Charlie couldn't respond. The car sped at him and he was hit straight on. He flew up in the air and came down hard on the top of the car. When the driver backed up, he fell off.

Crying out as pain attacked his ribs and left arm, Charlie looked up and saw the driver. He recognized him immediately. It was Jake Daniels.

Jake backed the car up and turned around. Charlie watched as he tossed a piece of paper out the window. He was only thankful that Jake hadn't run him over again.

"Charlie? Charlie!" Don was terrified. He had heard the car come, heard Charlie scream. What was happening?

"Charlie!"

Charlie heard his brother's voice calling him. He set his jaw hard, trying not to cry out in pain. He couldn't push himself up, so he crawled to his cell phone that had landed near the back of his car.

By the time he was there he was beginning to cry. His ribs protested his every move and every movement of his arm sent pain through him. He clutched the cell phone in his right hand and waited for his brother to stop screaming for him.

"Donny... help." It was all he could get out before he passed out from the pain.

Don's heart stopped beating when he heard his brother's voice. He was alive, but the pain was so loud in Charlie's voice. He couldn't imagine what pain his little brother was going through.

Wetting his dry mouth, Don spoke into the phone. "Buddy, I'm on my way. Just hold on for me, okay?"

He didn't get a response. "Charlie?"

He waited for Charlie to speak, but still went unanswered.

"Damn it," Don hissed as he ran down the steps to his car. He should have called for a team, told someone what he was doing. But all that mattered right now was getting to his brother.

He was thinking clearly enough to send an ambulance to the scene. He just prayed that he'd get there in time to see his brother first. He had to see for himself, had to know that his brother was still breathing.

Don used every shortcut he knew to get to his brother. It still took an agonizing thirty minutes to get there, but he did manage to beat the paramedics.

Charlie was crumpled on the ground. Don could see his brother's left arm was positioned in an unnatural angle that told him it had to be broken. Not knowing what other damage was done, he knelt beside his brother and wiped at the sweat on his little brother's forehead.

"I'm sorry, Buddy. You're... you're going to be okay. I-I promise."

Don stuttered because he didn't know. His brother had been run over. He was unconscious.

The paramedics arrived shortly after. Don decided he'd drive to the hospital by himself, knowing he should pick his father up and he should do something about Charlie's car. So he watched them take his brother away, and cried inside. He had failed to protect his brother again. What kind of brother was he?

He could hardly believe his brother had become such a target of violence. Don had always thought his job would prove more dangerous, his life would put him in harm's way. He had always felt comfortable with Charlie's choice because his brother would be safe. His life had only become dangerous when Don reentered his life and allowed Charlie to join his work. How could he have ever let that happen?

He could have found other ways to get along with his brother, find time to spend with him. It couldn't have been that hard, could it? He should have just made time for his brother. They would be as close as they are now if he had done that.

But somehow Don knew that wasn't true. His work was his life. Charlie had always tried to be a part of his life by doing things he liked. It was the same way now. Charlie wanted to be close to Don, so he consulted for the FBI. And Don paid attention to him then. When had Don tried to take an interest in his brother's work? When had he listened intently as his brother explained how he had solved a problem?

Don was torn. He couldn't keep putting his brother in danger by letting him continue to consult for the FBI. But what would happen to them if they stopped working together? Don couldn't let them drift apart again. He had gotten so used to have his brother in his life. He enjoyed it. He would miss spending time with Charlie if they didn't work together. And what would they do anyway? Their common ground was working for the FBI. It was what they had in common, what kept them linked together. So what would they have then?

Don shook his head. He didn't have an answer. For the time being, he would just have to protect his brother better than he had been. He'd come up with a solution later.

He walked over to Charlie's car and noticed a crumpled up piece of paper not far from it. He went to it, pulling out a glove in the mean time. He picked up the paper and read what was written inside. It made his stomach sick.

"Until next time."

**Well, this is pretty short again, I know, but this past week was one of those weeks when I wonder why I add more work to my already busy schedule by writing fanfic. That doesn't mean I'm going to stop mid-story, but sometimes it'd be nice to have more free time. It was just a bad week, so don't worry.**

**Thanks to thebondgirl for the ending to this chapter! She had the cool idea of Jake running Charlie over. Adds some angst, doesn't it? I thought it was about time to get some action into the story. I hope you guys like it.**

**HELP WANTED: Someone who knows what injuries would be sustained due to this car accident. Anyone?**


	7. It Never Leaves Me Alone

Waking up for the second time, Charlie had no idea where he was. A loud noise screamed in his ears and he wished it would shut up. He had the strange feeling he was dreaming, and in his dream he was one of the dead frogs that the biology lab cut open. People looked down at him and poked and prodded areas that already hurt enough without them touching it.

He didn't recognize anyone around him and that made him feel all the more afraid. His side was killing him and breathing seemed to make the pain worse.

"Sir, can you hear me? We're almost to the hospital. You're going to be fine."

Charlie managed a nod. He must be in ambulance. It only made sense after...

Jake!

The thought came screaming at him, and he began to panic. He was after him! He was going to get hurt! Jake would kill him. But if he hadn't today, what did he have in store? it was obvious that he could have just killed him and gotten it over with. Then what did he want, if not to kill him?

Charlie wanted his family with him. Only then did he feel safe. How did he know these were people who would help him? What if they were in on it?

"His pulse is racing. We need to calm him down. Sir, you need to breathe. Calm down for me, okay?"

Charlie just kept fighting. He needed to see Don! Don would tell him he was okay. He would protect him.

"Donnie!" Charlie cried out.

"Don is in another car. He'll be here. He's right behind us."

"Don!"

Charlie tried to turn around to see if they were telling the truth.

"He can't keep thrashing around like that. We need to sedate him."

At that statement, Charlie whirled around. At the sight of the needle, a needle that looked so huge, he passed out. The return to darkened bliss was welcomed.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Don called his team in to the scene. He should have done it to begin with.

"What? Don, why would the FBI need to investigate a hit and run?" Megan asked.

"Because the man who hit Charlie is the same guy we brought in for assisting Carl Waits."

"Jake?" Megan nearly whispered.

"Yeah."

Don hung up, knowing his point was made. He'd let them handle it. He had to go get his father.

He shook his head as he drove to the home his brother and father shared. It didn't seem right that he was coming there this way. It should be something else. He should be the one hurt. Don would never want his brother to have the responsibility of telling their father he was injured, so Charlie shouldn't even be involved. It should be Colby, or Megan, or David making the drive. They'd tell Alan and Charlie that he was hurt, and together the two would go to the hospital. It shouldn't be this way.

Don hated not being with Charlie. He hoped his brother was okay. He had to hope that he was, because that was what he was planning on telling their father when he walked through the front door.

Alan knew something was wrong. He had waited anxiously for some word. He could feel it in his gut, feel it in the pain in his heart. Something was wrong with one of his boys. The only question was who it was. He had tried calling both their cells and didn't get through to either. So he waited by the phone, then would walk over to the window to see if one of their cars would pull into the driveway.

And it was Don who pulled into the drive way, who came to the door. Something was wrong with Charlie. That didn't seem right to Alan, but he didn't want either of his sons to be hurt, so no matter who it was it wouldn't be right to him. He was their father. Of course he didn't think it was right. It was never right.

"Take me to him," Alan said when he met his oldest son at the door. Don stared into his eyes a second, momentarily thrown off by his father's statement. He didn't know how his father knew something had happened, but he didn't say anything. He just nodded and led the way back to his car.

Once they'd backed out of the driveway, Don stole a glance at his father. "What do you know?"

"Other than something happened to Charlie? Nothing."

"Then how-"

Alan chuckled. "I'm a parent, Donnie. We know. You'll understand if you ever give me any grandchildren."

Don rolled his eyes, though he enjoyed the lightness of the conversation. Only his father would bring up grandchildren in a situation like this.

"How bad is it, Donnie?" Alan asked now.

Don waited a moment before speaking. How could he phrase it? There was no nice way of putting it. Charlie had been hit by a car, plain and simple. Did he tell his father that it was probably done by the man who had assisted the man who had kidnapped and planned to murder him? He decided he should so Alan would be on his guard.

"Charlie was... he was hit by a car."

Alan took it in with wide eyes, waiting for the whole story. His pulse raced, but he tried not to show his distress.

"He must have taken a short cut because of the traffic. And when he went through an alley, his car stopped because he was out of gas... but he had just filled it up yesterday."

Alan didn't understand that, but he trusted his son would explain.

"He called me, and I talked to him for a minute, and then... he got hit." Alan placed a comforting hand on his son's hand before Don continued. "I went there, and I saw them take him in the ambulance. He was unconscious, but I didn't see any injury to his head, which is good. Before I came here, I called my team in to the scene... because I found a note that said, 'Until next time.'"

Alan got chills. He searched his son's face as Don parked the car in the hospital parking lot. What did that mean? Why would he find that note?

Don stared ahead of him for a while as he prepared himself to tell his father the final blow.

He turned to look his father in the eyes and said, "Dad, I think it was Jake."

Alan gasped and turned away from Don. He couldn't let his son see the horror that must be written so clearly across his face. He felt goose-bumps rise on his arms and he shivered. This couldn't be happening.

"Dad, I promise you I'll fix this. I'll-I'll take care of him in whatever way I need to. I'll hire twenty agents to watch him if I have to. He can move to Tahiti, or Antarctica if he has to! Please, don't be mad at me."

That caught Alan's attention so well that he whirled his head around to look at his oldest son. Don's eyes were pleading for him to understand that it wasn't his fault, for him not to be mad at him. But what made him think that he would be? Don wasn't the one who hit Charlie.

"Oh, Donnie." Alan reached across and took his oldest son in his arms as he hugged him close.

"I'm not mad at you. How could I be? You didn't run over Charlie."

"But I didn't protect him," Don replied, his voice muffled since his face was pressed so tightly against his father's chest.

Alan pushed Don back lightly so he could see his face. "No one expected you to. you do enough for your brother. It's okay that you weren't there this time. He'll be okay, right?"

Don nodded, though he wasn't sure that it was true. It had to be, though.

"Let's go find out, okay?"

The two went inside the hospital and were directed to a waiting room. Don hoped that they'd get news soon.

"Charles Eppes?" A tall doctor called.

Don and Alan both stood and went to the doctor, though the man was heading toward them already.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Jack Lawrence."

"Hello. I'm Alan, his father," Alan said as he shook the man's hand, and then Don did the same.

"I'm Don, his brother."

Dr. Lawrence smiled. "So you're the famous Don, huh?"

Don looked between the doctor and his father, confusedly. "What are you talking about?"

"Your brother was asking for you in the ambulance. Well, screaming for you is more like it."

Don felt his heart swell. Charlie had asked for him? Had he been scared? Had he needed him? Maybe he should have gone in the ambulance...

"He passed out in the ambulance, though. He started panicking, so one of the paramedics tried to sedate him. When he saw the needle, he passed out."

Alan gave a small chuckle. "He never did like needles."

"I suppose not, " Dr. Lawrence said with a smile. "Your son's left arm was fractured in two places and he has four broken ribs. We will set and cast the arm. Hopefully with physical therapy, he will regain full movement back in the arm. We don't want to have to use pins or plates with the fractures because of the chance of infection. You see, your son's spleen was torn and he's bleeding internally. We're hope that it will clot itself, so we'll wait a few hours to see if it does or not. If it hasn't clotted in the next few hours, we'll have to remove Charles' spleen."

"He can live without it, right?"

"Of course. He'll just have to be more careful about infections. He'll be more prone to diseases because the spleen helps fight off infections."

"Is he okay?"

"He'll be fine. He was extremely lucky with such an injury. Not many people who get hit by a car turn out this lucky. You two should be very thankful."

"We are. When can see him?" Don said snappishly.

"Right now if you like. Keep in mind that he will be in pain and may not be very aware of his surroundings."

Don was happy when he and his father were left alone with Charlie. His brother looked weak and defenseless. Don always liked to think that Charlie was at least a little weak, but this went beyond what he ever thought. It made him wonder how in the world his brother could have survived getting hit by a car. The only thing that made sense to him was that Jake didn't want to kill Charlie.

And that was it.

If Jake wanted to finish him off, he would have. So what did he have planned instead? That was what scared Don. Because if this was just the beginning, what could be next?

"I'm here now, Buddy. I'm sorry I wasn't in the ambulance with you," Don said as he squeezed the fingers on his brother's right hand.

Alan looked ready to fall apart, but Don could see him pulling himself together. He would definitely give his father some time alone later.

Charlie mumbled something inaudible.

"Hey, Buddy. You okay?" Don asked.

"Turn the TV off," Charlie muttered.

Alan and Don both looked at the turned-off TV and then at each other before focusing back on Charlie.

"Kiddo, the TV is off."

"Turn Letterman down. He talks to loud."

Don felt a grin spread across his face, the first one he'd felt in that day.

"Are you hurting, Charlie?"

"Tummy hurts, and my arm."

"Okay. You'll be fine, all right?"

"Be better if Letterman shut up."

Alan smiled that time, too. "Yes, I think a lot of us would be. That man needs to retire."

Don couldn't stifle a chuckle. He was familiar with Letterman. He'd spent many late nights watching him. He couldn't agree more.

Charlie soon fell asleep, mumbling something about Paul Shaffer.

Alan and Don waited around until a decision was made about Charlie's spleen. It turned out that Charlie did need his spleen to be removed, so Don and Alan went home for the time being. Don had the full intention of returning soon, with or without his father.

"Dad, you okay?" Don asked when they got inside from the silent drive home.

"Yeah. I'll fix it in the morning."

Don frowned. That wasn't a good sign.

"Dad?"

Alan just continued to stare and Don realized what was happening. He quickly reached his father's side and he took Alan's arm.

He led Alan to the couch and sat down beside him. "Dad, Charlie is going to be okay, I promise. Whatever happens, he'll come out okay. He's still Charlie. He's going to be fine."

"Whatever happens? What could happen?" It was something that Alan didn't know and it scared him. He didn't know what to expect with Jake, didn't know what he'd do to his son next. How could this be happening? How could Charlie be in danger again? He'd overcome so much after Carl. Not again. He couldn't handle it again.

"I can't take the uncertainty, Donnie. I don't like it one bit."

"I know. I don't either. But we have to trust Charlie. He showed tremendous strength these past months. He'll keep on doing that, I'm sure."

"I don't want him to go through it again. He may be able to take it, but I don't know if I can."

Don looked down at the floor for a moment, gathering his thoughts. He looked back up and met his father's eyes as he took both his father's hands in his.

"We have to trust Charlie. Charlie can do this. I'm going to be there every step of the way. I won't let anything happen to him. I have my team on this already. We'll get Jake, I swear. We won't let anything bad happen."

"You don't know that."

Don pondered that. "No, I don't know that, not for sure. But I have to believe that. Can you imagine if I went into every case knowing I couldn't catch the criminal, that I couldn't find a kidnapping victim? I wouldn't be able to do my job. That's why I have to believe, even when all odds are against me, that I'll do my job, that I'll succeed. It's as easy as that. You can't think that Charlie isn't going to make it out okay, or that Jake is going to get him. You have to believe that we'll get Jake before anything else happens. And if that's not the case, we'll catch him later. We can do this, Dad. Trust me. Trust us."

Alan was proud of his son. Don knew exactly what to tell him. He couldn't understand how his sons had gotten to be so much smarter and wiser than him. He was the parent, right?

He prayed that his sons would have the wisdom in the near future. They'd need it to stop Jake.

**There are no ill intentions directed toward David Letterman and the Late Show. I actually enjoy that show a lot and watch it often. Please don't take offense! It was for humorous purposes only!**

**THANK YOU TO THE WONDERFUL FRAIDYCAT! She's done it again! She helped me with all the medical parts to this. Thank you to everyone else who helped, too! I appreciate it!**

**Well, this is earlier than usual, thankfully. I hope that helps since it was a cliff hanger. Dun, dun, duh! Don't you hate them? LOL Like I said, I'll try to avoid them if I can, but, again, it does bump the reviews up realllll quick.**

**Next week is probably going to be another poo-poo week, so don't expect a quick update. See you then!**


	8. Your Voice Is in My Head

When Don returned to the hospital alone, Charlie was out of surgery. His brother was still asleep, so Don settled in the chair beside Charlie's bed. He hated being in this situation, hated the pain his brother was going through. Though it seemed like he'd said the same thing thousands of times before, Don vowed to protect his brother. He had to do something. There had to be some way to protect his brother, a way he hadn't thought of before. It seemed that all the other options hadn't been successful.

Sometimes Don wondered why he bothered to try to protect Charlie. It was for selfish reasons only it seemed.

Charlie had protected him and their father from Carl.

Don had failed.

Charlie had been kidnapped by Carl.

Don had failed.

Charlie had been hurt and threatened by Jake.

Don had failed.

Jake had run Charlie over with his car.

Don had failed.

With such failures, what good was he really doing? How was he being a good big brother? He protected people for a living. Don always thought he was good at his job. But was he really? He couldn't even protect his brother.

"Hey, Don," Alan said as he came in with a thermos of coffee in his hand. He held it out for Don and his son took it gratefully.

Alan had heard when his son left the house and figured it would be best to leave soon, too. He left shortly after his son did, just left better prepared.

"Any news on him?"

"He's okay. The surgery went well. They keep telling me how lucky he is." Don gave a snort, as though he didn't believe that for a second.

"You don't think he is?"

"You do?" Don said as he turned around to face his father with a raised brow.

"Yes, I do. He's been kidnapped, threatened, scared to within an inch of his life, and run over by a car. Now his spleen got pierced by a rib and he came out of surgery fine. Yes, I think he's lucky. I know men who couldn't go through half of that as well as he has. I don't know about you, but I think that's luck."

"Charlie doesn't believe in luck," Don whispered.

Alan laid a hand on his oldest son's shoulder. "He doesn't have to believe it to have it."

Don rubbed his eyes, feeling the weight of only an hour's rest pushing down on him.

"Drink your coffee, Donnie."

Alan knew what his son was going through. He had barely slept the night before until exhaustion finally set in, and even then he dreamed of Charlie. He was glad to be home, though. He knew he wouldn't have been any good to Charlie at the hospital. And if he hadn't left, Don surely wouldn't have. He had been surprised enough that Don had left when he did. His sons were so protective of each other. It made him sure that they would be okay should anything happen to him.

Don softly sipped at his coffee, his eyes never leaving his brother's face.

"I feel like I've run out of luck."

Alan sat down across from Don in a chair beside Charlie's bed. "How so?"

"I don't know. I'm just really messing up lately."

"Something wrong at work?"

"No, Dad! I can't understand how you of all people don't see it!"

"What?" Alan couldn't understand what it was that he was missing.

"You said that it's okay that I didn't protect him, but what about before now? I didn't protect him from Carl, I didn't protect him from Jake the first time! If it hadn't been for me he wouldn't have even been kidnapped and all this wouldn't have happened!"

"Shut... up."

Alan and Don whipped their heads toward Charlie, their eyes wide with surprise.

"Charlie? You okay?" Alan asked as he scooted his chair closer to his son.

"No. He thinks... he's a bad brother."

"What hurts, Buddy? Should I get a nurse?"

Charlie shook his head. "Not listening. You're not... a bad brother."

Don dropped to his knees by his brother's bed and rested his forehead on the edge of the mattress, closing his eyes. "I'm so sorry, Buddy."

Charlie rolled his eyes. "Don't you listen?"

Don looked up with a furrow to his brow.

"There's nothing for you to be sorry about. You're not a bad brother."

Charlie reached out and placed his hand lightly on top of his brother's head.

"I... didn't want you to protect me then. I wanted... to take care of myself and protect you two. I wouldn't have let you protect me. And this time... you had no way of knowing. You're the best brother in the world. So shut up."

Don chuckled as tears came to his eyes. "Okay."

"Good." Charlie gave his brother a smile.

"Are you in pain?" Alan asked his son.

"My stomach hurts. It feels like it's going to explode." As if to prove his point, he moaned.

"Yeah, the doctor said they had to fill your abdomen up with gas for the surgery," Don remembered the doctor telling him.

"Surgery?"

"You had to have your spleen removed, kiddo," Alan informed him.

"What else?" Charlie looked down at his arm and realized how hard it seemed to be to breathe.

"You have a few broken ribs and your arm is broken."

Charlie was silent for a long time. He remembered it so clearly, and with it came the fear that he hadn't had time to register at the time.

"I'm still tired. Can I be alone for a while?"

Don and Alan looked at each other. Alan nodded, telling his son to let him be alone.

"Sure, Buddy."

"You get your rest, son." Alan leaned down and lightly hugged his son and kissed his forehead.

"I will, Dad."

Don waited until Alan was heading toward the door to say goodbye to his brother.

"Be careful, Buddy."

Don turned to leave, but he felt Charlie grab his shirt sleeve.

He turned around and faced his little brother and was hit head-on by the fear in his brother's eyes.

"Tell me it isn't true."

"What, Buddy?"

"Please... tell me it wasn't Jake. Please."

Don felt his stomach knot. "What did you see?"

"It... it was him. He was driving." Don heard that panic in his brother's voice.

"Tell me it wasn't him. Don?"

"I... I found a note, where you were hit. It said, 'until next time.'"

Charlie turned away from his brother and clutched the sheet closer to his chin. "Oh God," he whispered.

"Charlie, listen to me. I'm going to take care of this, okay? My team is on this. We're going to find Jake and we're going to keep him from getting to you. There's an agent here at the hospital. You're going to be fine. You do know that, don't you?"

Charlie nodded.

"Tell me, Buddy." Don leaned forward.

Charlie couldn't. "I'm tired."

Don leaned back. "Okay. I'll be back later. Sleep well."

When the door closed behind Don, Charlie pressed his face into the pillow. This couldn't be happening. He thought his fears were over, that his paranoia was needless. But Jake was back. What would he do? Would he finish what Carl started?

Charlie shivered, though he wasn't cold. The door opened behind him and he figured it was Don or Alan.

"Forget something?" he asked as he turned to face the door.

But it wasn't his brother or his father. It was a woman. She looked vaguely familiar to him, though he couldn't remember ever seeing her before. It was something in her eyes that made him think he knew her.

"Can I help you?" Charlie asked, though he wasn't really in any position to help anyone.

"I suppose you can. I'm Janet Waits, Carl's mother."

"You, you shouldn't be here." Charlie scanned the walls beside him for a call button or a phone. Something. He found one to his left, but knowing all his injuries were on that side, he couldn't decide if it was worth risking the pain.

"Please, Charlie. I'm not going to hurt you. I'm not Carl and I'm not Jake."

"J-Jake? You know him?"

"Of course I know him. He was Carl's best friend for years. Their friendship only got stronger after Carl was kidnapped. Did he tell you about that?"

"Yes."

"It really changed him and his brothers. They were never the same after that. And then my Toddy..."

"You said brothers."

"Yes, Carl had two brothers. He was the middle child. Then there's Justin. He's 27 now. Carl would be 30, and Todd would be 33. They were all so close. Losing his brothers has really affected Justin."

"Is that what this is about? You want me to make things better with your son?" Charlie didn't understand this woman. What did she want with him? He was starting to contemplate pressing the button.

"No, not at all. You saw Justin not too long ago."

Charlie blanched. "What? When?" He could not recall meeting the man.

"He was across the street when you were eating outside CalSci. You can't tell me you didn't see him because from what I heard you went running away from him."

"That was him?" He could hardly believe it. So he had had reason to fear. What had he wanted with him?

"Don't worry. He just wanted to try to convince you to come talk to me. He wouldn't hurt a fly."

"Much unlike his brother," Charlie couldn't help but think.

"I... I just want a chance to explain. Please."

Charlie couldn't understand why he would want her to explain. He owed this woman nothing.

Except he took her son's life.

Damn. That thought hit home and he couldn't imagine how he could turn her down.

"I'm really tired. Could you come back some other time?"

"Really? You mean it?!" Janet exclaimed.

"Yes... but can you wait until I get better? I don't want my family to know. They're pretty protective of me."

"Sure. That's fine. I'll see you later then. I'll leave my card here so you can call me when you're better. Get well soon."

"Bye."

"Goodbye."

Charlie moaned as he pressed his face into his pillow once more. What had he done? Now he's talking to Carl's mother? She knew Jake! She could be in on it for all he knew. And what about her son? This was crazy!

Charlie let a few tears of frustration slip down his face before he fell asleep. He could hardly believe what he'd agreed to.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Don went to work that day, knowing he had to find out more about Jake. He couldn't let his brother live in fear like this. He had to make sure that Jake was caught and fast.

"What have you got?" Don asked his team as he walked into the break room they were all sitting in.

"Don! I wasn't expecting you back so soon. Is Charlie okay?" Megan said.

"He'll be fine. What do you know?"

"Jake was excused from parole for a week due to illness. When the week was up, he didn't return. He hasn't been heard from since," David informed him.

"Until he ran over Charlie."

"Are you sure? I mean, it could be someone else."

"Charlie saw him. It was him."

"Oh." Megan was hoping it had been someone else. Then the police could handle it and it would prove that Charlie didn't have anything to worry about except getting better.

"Damn," Colby muttered. "How's he holding up?"

"He had surgery yesterday to remove his spleen. He made it through okay. I got to talk to him for a while before I left."

"That's good."

"David, Colby, I want you to go to Jake's ex-girlfriend's house. I found out he'd been dating her for three years. She might know something."

"Okay." David and Colby stood, taking the information that Don held out to them.

"Don, you okay?" Megan asked when the other agents had left. Don had his back turned to her and he was clenching and unclenching his fists methodically.

"Don?" Megan repeated when he wouldn't answer her.

"I just... After talking to Charlie this morning, I know that I have to do this. I have to find Jake. I can't let him be that scared. I can't let that happen again."

Megan walked over to Don and placed a gentle hand on his arm. "I know, Don. I know."

"No, you don't. And that's what makes this so damn hard. No one blames me, when everyone should be. It's not right. I shouldn't be let off the hook."

"Don, no. You didn't do anything. You're the only one who thinks that, and it isn't true. And by the looks of you, you're not off the hook... because you won't let that happen."

She was right, but that didn't change anything. That didn't mean he was going to let himself off the hook that easily. He didn't deserve that. He wouldn't do it until he knew that his brother was safe and Jake was behind bars.

**Well, we didn't lose power this time, thankfully! We just had a lot of snow. So, yeah, I don't have a very good excuse for my late update. Sorry! I hope you guys are all surviving the snowy weathers! It's coooooold.**

**Note: I really have no knowledge about paroles and whether or not that's what would happen with Jake. Unless someone can tell me differently, just go with me on this one, okay? Thanks!**

**Watch Numb3rs tonight!**


	9. And It Chills Me to The Bone

Charlie slept fitfully, his conscience yelling at him all night. He had told Don he'd be more honest with him and that he'd allow his brother to protect him. Why couldn't he prove that by telling him about Janet? Don wasn't one to get mad about things like that. He usually wasn't angry with his brother at all. But Charlie couldn't just let this out. He was going to keep it to himself. Then again, he had chosen  
to do that with Carl and Jake. He didn't tell anyone, and it turned into such a disaster. The odds were against that happening again, right? Not if they included Carl's family.

If only things could be easier. Charlie wished that that could be so. His life had never been normal. He had been different from other kids, different from his family. He had wished for ordinary for years. No one really understood him, except for his mother at times. But he was alone in himself, unique to a point where he never fit in. Even at CalSci he rarely felt at home, and he hated that. So why would he think for a second that his life could go on as usual? That just didn't happen. Not in this world.

He was eagerly awaiting his family's arrival. He had been bored to tears overnight since he could hardly sleep. He fell asleep quickly at first, but woke up soon after from worrying so much. It wasn't a good night for him and he ached all over. He couldn't imagine what it would feel like off the medication. His stomach felt too big and it made him sore. Charlie couldn't wait to be better. He knew that  
stress wasn't helping him right now, so he awaited Don and Alan's return so he could have something to keep his mind off it. He didn't have to wait long. Don came in early in the morning to see him, probably before work, Charlie assumed.

"Hey, Buddy. How you feeling?" Don asked as he came closer to his brother with a tentative smile on his face.

"I'm okay." Charlie wondered if his brother would believe him.

"That's good. Did you sleep okay?"

"Yeah, pretty well." Again, could Don see the lie?

"I'm glad. Dad told me to tell you he'd be coming over later. He wanted to get a few things done at home first, and he wasn't sure if you'd be awake yet or not."

"That's fine. How's the case coming?"

"We're making progress."

Charlie frowned. Isn't that what they told family members when they had nothing new going on?

"Um, that's good, I guess."

"Yeah. Trust me, Charlie; I'm going to get this guy. No matter what it takes. The police already knew he wasn't making his parole, so they've been on the lookout for him. Every police station from Redding to Chula Vista has his picture. We'll get him."

Charlie nodded. "I know you will, Don. You always come through."

Don pulled up a chair and sat down. He kept his gaze on his brother's face. "I'm sorry I didn't come through for you this time."

"What? There was nothing more you could do, Don. You called for the ambulance, you came to the scene, and you told Dad. You did what you had to. That was all you could do."

"Yeah, but I wasn't there with you. I didn't catch that son of a bitch and I sure as hell didn't protect you from him."

Don felt the tension in his back. He was on edge about the whole situation. There should have been more he could do, but there was nothing that he could think of. Maybe later he would find a way to make this up to Charlie.

Don wished his brother wasn't so easy on him. He wasn't the good brother Charlie made him out to be. He wasn't a hero. He hadn't saved his brother. What kind of a superhero couldn't even save the people who mean the most to him?

"It's okay, Don. Really. Just... stop it, okay? I know you're feeling guilty but it's so needless it's not even funny. You need to let up on yourself. You're way too hard."

Charlie grimaced as he felt a pain in his side from moving the wrong way. Don caught the look and frowned in concern.

"What's the matter?"

"Hurts. I'm okay, though." Charlie waited for the pain to subside before speaking. It wasn't much, but it made it hard  
to breathe at times.

"Is there anything I can do?"

"No... I suppose you're not really in the mood to forgive yourself and let yourself off the hook, yet, are you?"

Don smiled. "No."

"Didn't think so."

Both boys looked up as someone walked in the room. It was a teenaged boy holding a bouquet of flowers. Charlie watched him come up and noticed the ring in the boy's left eyebrow. That had never made sense to him why someone would do that. Then again, he didn't understand why a lot of people did anything, and often people felt the same way about him.

"Hi. Um, are you Charles Eppes?" The teen asked.

"Yes."

"These are for you." The boy handed Charlie the flowers and he read the card.

"Happy trails to you until we meet again," the card read. Charlie looked at the sticker on the plastic covering of the bouquet and read the name of the flowers. He had never been too good with knowing his flowers.

They were bleeding hearts.

Charlie's own heart jumped in his chest.

"Don." He didn't scream, didn't even say the name overly loud. But Don heard a message of fear as loud as if Charlie had actually screamed it to him.

He leaned over and looked at the card, wondering what it was about.

"It's him, Don. It's Jake," Charlie whispered when Don leaned over for a better look.

Something flashed in Don's eyes and he spun toward the teenager. He grabbed the boy by the front of his shirt and brought their faces close together.

"Who had you send these flowers?" Don barked.

"S-s-some lady. She said it was for a friend."

"What was her name? I need a name!"

"I don't know her name! She just told me to give it to him and she paid me $100 for it."

"Where was this?" Don let go of the teen's shirt and took a calming breath.

"Just outside. I was riding by on my skateboard when she stopped me."

"What did she look like?"

"I don't know. Tall, red hair. She didn't look like she could hurt a fly. She had nice eyes."

"Damn it."

Don pulled out a card. "You think of anything else or if you see her again, you call this number, understand?"

"Y-yes, sir."

The teen basically ran out the door. Charlie turned his eyes to his older brother, who was pacing at the edge of his bed.

"Don?"

"He hired her to do it. No questions asked. He probably didn't even know her. What if he threatened her? Damn it, I could have more people in danger. He has to be close. I need to go to the office."

"Don, are you okay?"

"I'm fine." Don stopped before he got to the door, realizing that his brother was still in the room. "Are you okay, Buddy?"

"They're bleeding hearts, Donny. What... what if that means something?"

Don charged his brother and grasped Charlie's head tightly within his grasp. "Don't even think about it, you hear me? I'll take care of this. Don't worry about it. Don't let it so much as enter your mind for a second. I'm not going to let him get you, okay?"

The harshness in Don's voice made tears come to Charlie's eyes. It reminded him of times his parents had yelled at him for doing something dangerous, like the time he tried to stick a fork in an electrical outlet. They were just protecting him, but he didn't like to be yelled at.

"Oh, Buddy." Don's voice melted at the sight of tears in his brother's eyes. He squeezed Charlie's upper body tightly, so as not to hurt his injured ribs. Charlie held onto his brother's wrist with his good hand and allowed himself a moment to feel safe.

"Thank you," Charlie whispered to Don, so to thank his brother for taking such good care of him.

"It's okay, Buddy, you hear? I'll be back tonight. Maybe I'll bring some dinner, okay?" Don said as he moved toward the door, walking backwards.

"That'd be great."

"Okay. I'll see you later. Dad should be here any minute."

"All right. Bye, Don."

"See you, Charlie!" Don jogged out of Charlie's room, leaving his brother alone.

Which was never a good idea.  
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alan felt like his house was too empty. His boys weren't home. It was just him. He still had an eerie feeling like he wasn't alone.

He worried about Charlie being in the hospital. He hoped his son would be okay. Luck had definitely won this time, for which Alan was thankful. His sons had not been so lucky lately, and that made him feel worse because he hadn't been directly hurt. The only pain he had endured was because of his sons' hurts.

He finished up the last of his household jobs and gathered what he'd need. He picked up the latest book he had been reading in case he got bored and grabbed his keys off the mail table. Wondering if Charlie would be bored, he decided to go upstairs to Charlie's room to grab a notebook.

He walked up the stairs and opened the door, wondering to himself when he had last seen the door closed.

Alan's heart jumped to his throat when he opened the door and found a man in a ski mask spray-painting his son's wall in red. The man turned when the door opened and he stopped what he was doing.

"Get out of the way, old man. This isn't about you," he said as he came toward the door.

"No. Y-y-ou hurt my son!" Alan screamed, realizing it had to be Jake.

"Fine."

Jake shoved Alan into the doorframe, and Alan hit his forearm painfully on the wood. He wasn't able to react as Jake ran past him and down the stairs, escaping through the back door.

He began to shake when he knew he was alone again. He turned around and took out his cell phone from his pocket. He dialed the only number he could think of at the moment and stared at the wall until his call was answered.

"Donny, we have a problem."

* * *

Don stared at the red lettering, oblivious to the sound of the CSU around him. The words, "Welcome home, Eppes" shouldn't have been anything terrifying, but the thought of his little brother seeing them scared Don. 

He turned and walked out the door and downstairs. His father was at the kitchen table with his head in his hands.

"Dad? Are you all right?" Don asked as he pulled up a chair and sat in front of his father.

"Yes, I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

Alan rubbed his forearm, without even thinking.

"What happened to your arm?" Don demanded.

"It's nothing, Donny. Stop worrying."

"If he hurt you, it's my job to know."

Don held out his hand and waited for his father to place his arm there. When he did, Don rolled up the sleeve and saw a nasty purple bruise.

"How did it happen?"

"He shoved me out of his way and into the door frame."

"Damn it. This guy is picking the wrong people to mess with." Don shook his head as he let go of his father's arm.

"Did you put some ice on it?" Don asked once his temper had calmed.

"Yes. Would you stop worrying? I'm fine."

"How in the hell am I supposed to stop worrying when left and right my family is being threatened by some lunatic?!"

"Donny, calm down."

"I can't!" he screamed, and Alan flinched. "I can't calm down! My team is after this guy and we have yet to stop him but he's made three attacks on Charlie so far!"

"What? Three?"

Damn. Don hadn't meant for that to get out of the bag so soon. "Yeah, he sent Charlie flowers."

"Wh-what kind of flowers?"

"Bleeding hearts."

What did that mean? Alan felt his pulse race. This couldn't be happening. Bleeding hearts? Was that really what Jake was planning to do to Charlie? Alan shivered just at the thought that at one time he had talked to this man and had been polite to him.

"Don't worry about it, Dad. Really."

"If you can worry, so can I," Alan snapped.

Megan, who was listening from the other side of the door, stepped in then.

"I think you both need to calm down, okay?" Megan suggested. She placed a gentle hand on Alan's shoulder and gave Don a look that told him now was not the time to get worked up.

Alan took a deep breath. "You're right, Megan. I'm sorry I got worked up."

"It's okay, Dad. We both got a little too carried away."

"It's understandable, you guys, but you need to keep the center of all this in mind."

"Charlie?" Don looked up at Megan and she nodded.

"I know you're both too busy worrying about him to actually consider his feelings in this. Give him more credit, though, okay? He'll need your help to get through this, no doubt about it. But let him be a part of the process, too. Maybe not now, but later, when he has some more strength. He's not going to be allowed to go to work, for what, 10-14 days? He'll need something to keep him occupied. Just, please, work with him, too. And don't you dare leave him out or he'll be angry with you for it."

Megan squeezed Alan's shoulder and smiled at Don. "Now, I think Charlie could use some company. Alan, you're allowed to go. You might as well, too, Don."

"Okay. You want me to drive, Dad?"

"Sure."

The boys stood and walked toward the door. Don stopped by Megan and leaned over. "Thanks," he whispered.

"You're welcome," Megan said back.

* * *

Charlie felt lonely. Don had told him that their father would be stopping by soon after he had left. It had been four hours since Don had stopped in. He slept off and on, but he was too curious as to where his father was to sleep soundly. His father finally came later, and Don was with him. 

"Hey, guys," Charlie said, trying to sound cheerful, though he wasn't feeling that way. He was happy to see his family finally arrive, but he couldn't help but wonder where they had been.

"Hi, kiddo. How are you feeling?"

"I'm okay, Dad. What about you?"

"I'm just fine. Why?"

So he was fine? Apparently there wasn't any immediate danger to be concerned about. So why had he been gone?

"Don?"

"I'm fine, too, Buddy."

Charlie took a moment to look at his brother's face. There was definitely something wrong. "You don't look it."

Don smiled. "I'm fine. Really."

Alan came over and sat by Charlie and rubbed his son's shoulder. "I'm sorry I didn't come sooner."

"It's okay... but why were you late?"

Alan and Don shared a look, which wasn't a good sign to Charlie. What had happened?

"What?" Charlie asked when they seemed to be having a silent conversation that he wasn't a part of.

Don turned his gaze from his father to his little brother. "Buddy, something happened today."

Charlie looked frantically between Don and Alan. "What? Are you all right?"

"We're okay. It's just, um... Jake was at your house."

Charlie waited for that to sink in. Jake had been at his house? The idea sent chills through him, and he clutched the blanket a little tighter around him.

"There's a team there right now. We're hoping since he was so close we can catch him pretty quickly. Who knows, maybe by tomorrow this whole mess will be over?"

Charlie hoped so. It would make his life a whole lot easier. After that he'd just have to get through talking to Janet.

"Were you home?" Charlie asked as he turned his gaze on his father.

Alan couldn't look away from the soulful brown eyes that stared right through him. He wanted to lie to them, to tell them he had been safe and sound. But he couldn't lie, not with those eyes looking at him.

"Yes, I was."

A rare occasion occurred and anger flashed in those brown eyes. "Did he hurt you?"

Alan silently rolled up his sleeve and showed him the bruise on his arm. "It's okay."

"What happened?" Charlie asked as he gingerly ran his finger over the bruise.

"He pushed me and I hit it on the door frame."

"I'm sorry."

Alan smiled gently and brushed Charlie's hair back. "Don't you worry about that, kiddo. You have nothing to be sorry for."

Charlie smiled back at his father and looked over at his brother. Don was staring at the wall opposite him. Charlie could see a storm brewing, and he wondered when the first bolt of lightning would strike.

**Hello! I'm still alive, I promise! I'm so sorry about this delay. It's awful, I know. I've been doing horrible in my Trig class, so I've been spending basically ever spare moment on it. Today I got at school eight hours before my first class and for nothing, apparently. There was supposed to be a tutoring session, but it was canceled. Grr. So, I finished this in my spare time. I hope you liked it. I tried to make it long, but sometimes it's hard to tell what you consider long. LOL**

**Take care!**


	10. I Can't Live Without Fear

Charlie wished his family didn't care so much sometimes. They were always there with him, and it made him wonder what could happen to them if he was attacked when they were with him. He couldn't let them get hurt because of him. Alan had

already suffered a nasty bruise because of him. What next? Nothing worse could happen.

But Charlie couldn't get them to go away. The idea of going on a vacation seemed a joke to them, but Charlie was completely serious. Don's team could take care of Jake without Don. He knew he was being watched 24/7, but he still didn't feel safe and if he didn't feel safe, he knew his family wasn't.

He was supposed to go home in a couple hours. Alan decided not to come in until it was time to take him home, and Don would be at the house to greet him during his lunch break.

Charlie was relieved to be able to leave the hospital. Something about it bothered him. He hated the fact that he couldn't sleep in his room, though. The FBI was still investigating and the writing was still on the wall. He knew that Don and Alan would do their best to keep him from seeing it, but something drew him to it. Charlie knew he would see it some time.

About an hour before Alan was to come and pick him up, and male doctor walked it with scrubs on and a surgical mask covering his nose and mouth. The man's eyes squinted a little, hinting at a smile.

"I came to say good-bye. I hope you have fun at home."

Charlie's heart raced. It couldn't be. The FBI was protecting him. How could Jake get inside?

"Nurse! Nurse!" he screamed, searching for the call button.

Jake came closer, laughing evilly. He ran has hand down the side of Charlie's face and Charlie fought him off.

"Help!" he screamed.

"See you, Charlie."

Two FBI agents and a nurse ran into the room, and Jake disappeared. The agents searched the room, looking for something, and the nurse worked to calm his racing heart. Charlie tried to breathe normally, but the fear was shaking him.

"Charlie? Are you okay now?" the nurse asked once his heart rate went back to normal.

"Y-yes."

"Can you tell me what happened?"

Charlie thought a moment. He couldn't say that Jake was there because they would know he was lying. But he had been there. Charlie had seen him.

"It... must have been a nightmare."

The nurse smiled warmly. "It's okay. Maybe you should try to stay awake until you get home, now, okay?"

Charlie nodded in agreement and he saw one of the agents roll his eyes. He hadn't meant to annoy them, but he had felt so afraid. But he had been wide awake. It wasn't a nightmare. Was Jake really getting to him that badly?

Alan came walking in a half an hour later. He smiled happily at his son. "Ready to go home?"

"Yeah, Dad. I'm ready." Charlie had gotten dressed and was waiting for his father to come. He was ready to get out. He needed home. Maybe then he could start feeling better.

"You okay?" Alan asked, noticing a hint of fear in his son's eyes.

"I'm fine," Charlie said as he turned to look at his father, even managing to pull off a smile.

"It's going to be fine, I promise. You... you don't have to go into your room for a while. You'll sleep in Donny's room, okay?"

"I know. I'm fine, Dad. Really. Don't worry so much."

"Okay. Well, let's get you home, then. Don will be waiting."

"Good."

Charlie smiled. The idea of his brother waiting on him seemed a welcoming idea. He wanted to see his brother, though it had only been the night before. Something about his brother being with him made him feel safe. Charlie could remember worrying when he was home alone. Often his parents would leave in the morning and would promise to be back when he woke up. But he knew the moment they left and he couldn't get back to sleep. However, if he and Don were home alone, he felt fine. He always felt safe in his brother's company. Now he would have his father and his brother. He hoped that he'd be able to find that safe feeling again.

Thankfully, it wasn't long before Charlie was safely home. He was helped out of the car by his father and Don stood holding the door to the house open for him. The brothers smiled at each and Charlie felt better already. He loved his brother's smile because if his brother could genuinely smile at him, it meant something was okay in life.

"How you doing, Buddy?" Don asked as Charlie passed him by.

Charlie gave his brother a small nod as he walked past him and he surveyed the house. Everything was the same, except for his room. He felt a chill run through him just at the thought that Jake had been in his house when his father was there, too. The possible outcomes of that ran through his mind and he shivered again.

"You okay?" Don asked half-way through a shiver as he placed his hand on Charlie's shoulder. Charlie turned to face his brother and smiled.

"I'm fine." Charlie hugged his brother and Don welcomed it.

He hugged his brother back, frowning as he wondered if something was wrong. He looked over Charlie's head to their father. Alan just shrugged, not knowing what was wrong either.

Don tried to break away from the hug, but Charlie just held on tighter. He pressed his face into his brother's shoulder and then rested his cheek there. Don held on tighter, too, sensing something was amiss. Charlie finally let his brother go and smiled, as though there had been nothing different going on.

"Can I go upstairs? I'm pretty tired still."

"Sure, Buddy. I'll help you." Don gave his father a look, just to let him know that he would try to talk to Charlie for a while about the silent message given through the hug.

Charlie kept a hand on the banister to keep himself steady. He felt achey from moving so much. He wasn't used to it yet. His stomach tended to protest the extra movement, so he was especially thankful for the bed at the end of his journey upstairs. He noticed how Don tried to keep him from looking toward his room, though he had seen the door was closed. Charlie wanted to be in there, but he didn't mind coming into his brother's room.

There were times when Charlie worried about his brother a lot or would start to miss him that he would go inside Don's room and sleep in his bed, or look at his things. There was a certain feeling in his room that felt like Don and it was the only thing that Charlie had of his brother when he was away for so long. Even now he came to his brother's room when he knew there was a dangerous case going on or a dangerous situation. Somehow it made him feel better, feel close to his brother. Maybe that would help him now.

Charlie lay face down on the bed. He laid his cheek on the pillow so he could look over at his brother. Don sat on the bed with him and rubbed his brother's back gently.

"What's the matter?" Don asked softly and Charlie could swear his brother could see right through his mask. Maybe he knew he thought he saw Jake. Maybe he thought he was going crazy. Maybe Don knew everything. Somehow, Charlie wouldn't be surprised.

"Nothing, Don. I'm just tired."

"Come on, Charlie. Since when can you not talk to me? I'm your brother. I'm here for you. Tell me what's going on."

Charlie wondered why his brother felt like he had to say that so often. Sometimes it actually worked and he'd tell Don everything. Lately, however, it seemed like it was rarely working.

"I think I'm going crazy." He hadn't meant to say anything. He was going to just go on like nothing was wrong. But the words had slipped out, and it was too late now to stop them. Charlie knew his brother had heard the words. There was no way he'd miss something like that.

"Why?" Don asked as he searched his brother's eyes. It was as if he was looking for some sign that Charlie was going crazy. Charlie felt exposed when his brother looked at him like that. He wanted to be free from his brother's assessing gaze.

"I saw him today."

"Who? Jake?" Don's voice rose a little higher when he realized Jake had to be the "him" his brother was talking about.

Charlie gave a small nod, one that he didn't really want to give. He made it small, so it would seem he barely had moved his head at all. But Don knew. He always knew.

"What happened? Did he hurt you?"

Charlie shook his head, squeezing his eyes tightly shut.

"What did he do, Charlie?" Don demanded in an angry voice.

"He wasn't there!" Charlie screamed and Don backed up. What was he talking about? How could he have seen Jake without him actually being there?

"I called for a nurse, for help, and a couple agents came in with a nurse. But he vanished when they came in. He hadn't been there, Don. I imagined it."

Regardless of that fact, Charlie curled into a ball as best he could and shook. He could feel Jake's hand on his cheek and he involuntarily touched it, as if to swipe his hand away.

Don didn't know what to make of it. He couldn't imagine his brother going crazy. He knew that wasn't it. It was a nightmare, something that had happened, even if he was awake. He refused to believe that Charlie was hallucinating. It was fear. It was living in terror. He was beginning to expect something like that to actually happen. But would it? He couldn't let it.

"You're not going crazy, Charlie."

Charlie whined a little as he hid his face from view. He pressed his face into the pillow, muffling the noise, until his brother moved it away.

"Listen to me, Buddy. You are not going crazy."

Don made Charlie keep eye contact with him. He wouldn't allow him to think for a minute that he didn't believe that it was true. Maybe then Charlie would believe it, too.

Charlie could believe it, if his brother could believe it. Don knew what was right. He knew when someone was lying. He knew the truth. Didn't he? So Charlie had to be able to trust him.

Regardless of that fact, the fear had been there. The nightmare had seemed completely real to him. He had been there. He had felt Jake's presence... and it had affected him.

"Okay," Charlie whispered, to confirm to Don that he didn't think he was going crazy.

"Good." Don smiled, but before Charlie smiled back, his brother flinched. Something had happened. He had moved as though someone had actually touched him, but Don hadn't moved. Nothing had happened. So what was it?

"What did he do to you?" Don asked again.

Charlie didn't want Don to worry about that. He shouldn't have said anything to begin with. "Nothing, Don. He wasn't even there."

Charlie laid back down and closed his eyes, as though to fall asleep. After several minutes had passed without Don leaving, he opened his eyes once more.

"What?" he asked, trying to sound normal.

"What happened, Charlie?"

Charlie slowly ran his tongue over his teeth, stalling for time. He set his jaw, determined not to let the memory overwhelm him. "I... I could feel him there." He locked his gaze with his brother as he spoke, surprising himself that he was strong enough to look him in the eye. "His, his voice just tore at me. And he..."

"What, Buddy? What did he do?" Don asked after a long pause in the story.

"He touched me." Charlie shivered as he felt Jake's rough hand on his face again. "I could have sworn he was there. I knew he was. He was just... everywhere. It was so consuming. I felt trapped, cornered. I didn't think I'd get free from him, but I had to. So I called for help... and it turned out it was for nothing."

Don shook his head. "No... no, I don't believe that. It wasn't for nothing. Charlie, you were scared. That was a reason. I mean, can you imagine if you stopped and thought, 'I must be hallucinating. I'll just wait for him to go away?' What if it was really him? You did what you had to do, and it made him go away, didn't it?"

Charlie shrugged, looking down at the dark blue stripes on his comforter.

"It's okay to be scared, Buddy," Don said as he laid his hand over his brother's. "I know he wasn't really there, but that doesn't mean you couldn't be scared. It only makes sense that you'd be scared."

Charlie wouldn't look up. He didn't want Don to be right. He wasn't right. He shouldn't be afraid. He should be brave. He should know the difference between what is real and what isn't. He must be the weakest person in the world.

"Charlie? Buddy?"

Charlie managed to raise his chin and look Don in the eyes. What did he want to say?

"I'm going to take care of this. Soon you won't have to worry about being afraid anymore. It's going to be fine. I promise, and I know I've promised this a million times before. But, please, I don't want you to be scared anymore. I want you to feel safe."

"I do, Don... when you're with me. But when I'm alone, it just... it consumes me."

"I know. I know, Buddy."

Charlie moved closer to his brother and Don placed an arm around him. Don was content to stay there until his brother fell asleep. He had a feeling it would be hard for Charlie to fall asleep. Maybe it would make it easier if he was in there. He liked to think so.

Charlie closed his eyes and rested his head on Don's shoulder. He threw an arm over his brother's stomach and gave Don a small hug before settling in to sleep. He felt Don squeeze his shoulder in response and he smiled. He found it easy to sleep when he was sleeping safely beside his brother. Before he knew it, he was sound asleep.

Alan wondered what was going on upstairs, so he quietly made his way toward Don's old room. He smiled when he slowly opened up the door and saw Charlie nestled comfortably under his brother's arm. Don was sitting up on the bed, smiling down at his little brother. He turned his head when the door opened and he saw his father peaking in.

"Is he okay?" Alan whispered.

Don nodded. "I think so."

Alan smiled. "Good."

Figuring Charlie would be okay now, Don began to slide away from his brother. He was stopped when Charlie's hand latched onto a piece of his shirt and he mumbled, "Don."

Don looked at his father and shrugged. Alan chuckled softly to himself.

Don settled back in beside Charlie and kept his arm around him. "I'm still here, Buddy. I'm not going anywhere."

**Late. Again. Sorry. Forgive? Thanks. Love!**

**Once again I am sorry that I'm late. And in case anyone was wondering, I am NOT going to have Charlie go crazy or anything in this story. He won't go to any therapist or any treatments for any mental problems. It was just a hallucination. Nothing more. Hey, and the title of this chapter actually works well with it. Cool, huh?**

**I wanted to get Charlie going into his room into this chapter, but I was afraid it would take too much longer to get it written, too, and I'd end up cutting it in half and have the second half in the next chapter. And, since I don't know when I'll be able to update again, I figure it'd be safer not to put it. So, you have that to look forward to! I hope you'll like it. More angst to come!**

**PLEASE REVIEW! Thanks!**


	11. Thanks To You

Don wandered downstairs after slipping quietly out of his old room. It was still early in the day, so he knew he couldn't spend it all with his brother. He hoped Charlie would understand and still be able to sleep peacefully. He didn't want Charlie to lose any sleep because of him, but he still had a job to do.

Alan was downstairs in the living room when Don walked in. He looked up through his reading glasses and set down the book he'd been reading. He removed his glasses, folded them, and set them on the coffee table.

"What was that all about?" Alan asked.

"I don't know, Dad. Charlie... he's had it really rough here lately. I think he just needs a little pity-time every now and then, you know?"

"Well, it's only human, but there was something more to that, Don. He's not one to wallow in self-pity. What did you boys talk about?"

Don sank into the leather cushions on the couch, shaking his head in confusion. "I don't know what to make of it. He told me he saw Jake today."

Alan leaned forward in his seat. "What?"

"I know. Apparently it didn't really happen. He hallucinated or something. I don't know what. But, if his mind is doing that to him, he's under way too much stress. Don't you think?"

Alan nodded. "Yes, I do. But how are we supposed to take that stress away? It's not like we can actually make him forget what's going on. It's on his mind 24/7. It's on my mind 24/7 and yours, too, I'm sure."

Don nodded in confirmation. "So what do we do? We can't just let him break down because of something that isn't there. It's bad enough he worries about the real Jake. I mean, can you imagine if Jake really does show up one day and Charlie thinks he's not there? That he's just hallucinating again?"

Alan shook his head at the thought. "I don't know what to tell you, Donny. I can only say that we need to be there for him as much as possible."

"That's just the thing. I need to get to work. I'm working on this case, you know. I can't spend all my time with him because I'm trying to work on the case to catch Jake."

"No one is asking you to. I'm just saying that we need to watch out for him. Not just with Jake. Maybe we need to protect him from himself. You know how it is when you start running things like this in your mind over and over again. We can't let him get to that point. It'll eat away at his insides."

"Yeah. I know what you mean." Don did not want this to turn into a conversation about his problems. But he did know what that was like. It was what he was doing to himself day and night. He ran through the possible outcomes, the possible injuries Jake could inflict on Charlie. He didn't like it, but it kept him motivated enough to stay at the top of his game.

"I'll go check on him," Alan said as he pushed himself up off his seat.

"Okay. I need to get to work now anyway."

"All right. Come home for supper tonight. I think Charlie would appreciate it."

Don nodded. "I'll be here."

Alan smiled. He wanted his sons to be close to him and close to each other. He realized that sometimes they forgot how much they needed each other to get by. Charlie would be seeing this more and more, so he wanted Don to be close should he ever need him. Alan knew he'd be around for quite some time, but when that changed, he wanted them to be used to depending on each other.

Charlie was sleeping peacefully when Alan got upstairs. Alan sat gently on the bed beside his son and stroked his hair. Charlie merely responded by pushing deeper into his pillows. Alan smiled down at his son. He was so happy he was home again. He could live without having to put up with him for the next week and a half. He knew that Charlie would whine and complain after a while about being bored and wanting to go back to work. That would be one challenge Alan wanted to live without.

Some time during the day Charlie began to feel fully energized. It was strange for him since he'd felt so groggy lately. He wanted to get up and do something, but he knew he couldn't, and shouldn't.

His arm seemed heavy to him with the large cast over it. He chose black so no one would make him feel like a five-year-old and write messages on it. He smiled at his cleverness.

Charlie got up and went to the bathroom to clean up. His arm itched to be cleaned, but he couldn't do anything about that for a while. He'd have to find something to do to keep his mind off it. Looking in the mirror, he suddenly caught something out of the corner of his eye. There were white spots on his cast. He moved it so he could see what it read in the mirror and saw the word "Don" backwards in the mirror.

Charlie couldn't help but laugh at his brother. He had gotten a white-out pen to write on his cast. It lightened his mood considerably and made the day seem much easier.

He was happy to see his brother come home for supper. He was in the living room watching TV when Don came through the front door. Charlie looked up and smiled at him and Don was pleased to see it.

"Hey, Charlie. What's up?"

"I'm just watching TV. What are you up to?"

"Looking for a good meal." Don smiled as he hung up his suit jacket on the coat hanger and came over to sit down in the leather arm chair facing the TV.

"Come eat," Alan said as he came out holding a pan of meat loaf. He went back into the kitchen and brought out homemade macaroni and cheese and green beans.

"Hey, Dad. Looks good," Don commented as he came up to the table.

"Donny. When'd you get here?"

"A couple of minutes ago."

"Well, come sit down. What you want to drink? Water?"

"A beer if you have any."

Alan rolled his eyes. "You're the only reason I keep beer in the house."

"In whose house, Dad?" Charlie teased as he came up to the table as well.

"Don't you start with me too." Alan pointed a finger at Charlie.

Charlie and Don shared a grin as their father returned to serving their dinner. Charlie sat across from Don and waited for his plate to be served. He took a sip of water while he waited and smiled when everyone had been served.

"Dig in," Alan said, spreading his hands out.

"Don't mind if I do," Don said.

For the first few minutes everyone ate in silence. After they had eaten for a while, Charlie started a conversation with his older brother.

"Hey, Don. How's the latest case coming?"

Don nodded. "It's going pretty well. We could have used your help on this one, but we're doing all right."

"That's good. I miss getting to work on it."

"Yeah, we all miss you too."

"How about, um... how about with Jake?" Charlie asked timidly.

Don and Alan paused in eating and looked at each other. Alan didn't know what Don would say. He was interested as well, but he wasn't expecting Charlie to ask.

Don cleared his throat before answering his brother. "It's going fine. We're progressing as normal. We'll catch him."

Charlie nodded, though he didn't exactly believe it was true.

"I'm sure you will, Donny. We have complete trust in you, right, Charlie?"

"Right," Charlie replied and smiled rather fakely.

Don frowned slightly at the look on his brother's face. It didn't look very sincere to him, but maybe he was just looking too far into it. Maybe he was tired. Maybe he wasn't really paying attention. Maybe he was upset...

For the rest of the meal, Charlie picked at his food. He hadn't wanted to hear that the agents were "progressing as normal." He wanted to hear details. He wanted to hear the excitement in Don's voice he got when they were almost ready to catch the bad guy. But Don sounded resigned, almost bored with the case. Nothing new had happened since the flowers and the home invasion. There had to be something more to this for Don to get what he needed. It wasn't enough concrete evidence to catch up with him. There were no leads, just a few taunts here and there.

"Are you feeling okay, Charlie?" Alan asked as he got up to get the dishes. He placed his hand on his son's forehead, knowing they should be cautious with Charlie and colds due to the removal of his spleen. He didn't feel a fever, but he could see that something was definitely up. Sometimes he actually wanted it to be a cold.

Don's attention was fixed on his brother as well. He wondered if something was wrong. He looked to his father. He hoped it was nothing serious.

"No fever. How do you feel?"

"Tired," Charlie replied, avoiding their gazes.

"Well, why don't you go upstairs? You should get some sleep if you're tired. We don't want you to catch a cold or anything."

"Yeah, okay."

"Sleep well, Buddy," Don said as he watched his brother slowly leave the room. He waited until he heard the door close upstairs before he pounced on his father.

"Has he been in his room?" Don demanded to know.

"Not that I know of," Alan said, looking toward the stairs.

He walked around so that he could see the door to Don's old room and he saw a light on from under the door.

"He's in your room right now. I don't think he's been in his room since before he was in the hospital."

"I thought maybe that was what was bothering him."

Alan shook his head. "No. He slept in pretty late, came downstairs and watched TV for a while, fell asleep, and watched some more TV. He's been in my sights all day."

"Hm. I wonder what's wrong then?"

"I don't know. I hope he's not getting a cold or something."

"Yeah, me, too. Well, I hate to eat and run, but I need to get back to work."

"At this hour?"

"Only for a little while. I just have a few papers to fill out. It won't be long."

"Okay. Thanks for coming for supper."

"Thanks for the delicious meal." Don smiled broadly at his father. "Take care of Charlie for me."

"I will."

"I know. See you, Dad."

"Bye, Donny."

Alan returned to gathering the dishes, thinking it convenient that both his sons left when it was time to do the dishes.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Charlie did manage to fall asleep for a several hours. He woke up a little after midnight and couldn't get back to sleep. He felt the urge to move. He could feel his room pulling at him, beckoning him to come take a look. It was supposed to be cleaned tomorrow anyway. So it was now or never.

He slowly made his way down the hall. He saw that the door to his father's room was open, but Alan wasn't inside. Figuring his father had fallen asleep downstairs, Charlie tiptoed on.

Quietly Charlie opened up the door to his room. It was dark, and he didn't want that to change. He felt around for his flashlight on the night stand and found it easily. He turned the light on and shone it across the room. He felt bile rise in his throat at the sight before him.

If it was this bad now, Charlie couldn't imagine what he would have thought if he'd come home to this unprepared. His heart pounded in his chest and sweat covered his forehead. His knees began to buckle and he sank to the floor. Why had they lied to him? Someone should have warned him about this. Someone should have told him about it. How could they tell him that Jake had just written "Welcome home, Eppes" on his wall? It was so much more than that.

Red writing surrounded his room, surrounded the walls. It was as though someone had written a novel across his room. It covered the ceiling, the lights, the wall, the floors, and sometimes even overlapped across the furniture. The central wording said, "You're going to die. I will kill you." Other lines read, "Revenge is so sweet," "Ready for some fun?", "Don't bother running; I'll find you." Every line stabbed him until he couldn't breathe. He fell fully on the floor, covered in the frightening red writing. He covered his eyes, trying to hide from it all. It wasn't there. It couldn't be. It was all in his head. All in his head!

"You're safe, Charlie. You're safe. You're safe," Charlie whispered to himself as he held himself in a tighter ball in the middle of his room.

Though he told himself that, he didn't really believe it. Deep down he was crying out, "Save me!"

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Don couldn't believe he had actually forgotten his cellphone. It was the one thing he kept with him at all times. He just didn't forget it. But some how he had left it at his brother's house when he had stopped by for dinner. Since he'd been at the office since then, he hadn't really missed any calls. But now, since he was going home, he would need it in case of an emergency. He was thankful that he had a spare key. He would hate to wake up his brother or father just because of his cell phone.

Don walked through the front door quietly, expecting no one to be up to bother. He jumped when he turned and saw his father stretched out on the couch snoring. He smiled to himself at the sight. He decided not to wake him since he looked comfortable enough where he was. He quietly searched the areas he'd been for his cellphone. He found his cellphone on the kitchen table with a sticky note on it that read, "Don's phone." Don smiled and shook his head. His father must have found it and left it out for him. He was glad he didn't have to risk waking his dad up by looking for it.

Just as he grabbed the phone to pick up and put in his pocket, a thud sounded from upstairs. It wasn't loud enough to be a fall, but it made Don wonder what it could be. He snuck up the stairs, thankful to see the noise hadn't woke his father. He went to his old room and found it empty, as was the bathroom and his father's room. It could only mean one thing.

"Damn it," Don breathed. He slowly opened the door to Charlie's room and found his brother lying in the middle of the floor, curled up into a tight ball. He could only see that from the light shine of the moon through the window. He could see a small glimmer of light coming from Charlie's folded arms. Don could see that Charlie had a flashlight in his hands, but it was being covered by his arm wrapped tightly against him.

"Oh, Charlie," Don said as he flipped on the light, feeling sorry for his brother. He wasn't expecting what happened when the light turned on. No wonder Charlie was upset.

"Charlie, don't touch anything." Don didn't actually expect Charlie to. Charlie was too busy shielding himself on the floor to touch anything else.

"Come on. Let's get out of here." Don quickly gathered his brother close to him and led him from the room. Don turned off the light, hoping that Charlie couldn't see any more of the writing on the wall. He led a howling Charlie back to his old room and sat with him on the bed.

"Make it go away! Please!" Charlie cried as he pressed his face tightly against Don's chest. His main goal was to hide his view of everything. He didn't want to see the world because he knew when he opened his eyes he'd see the horrible red writing. It scared him, taunted him. What did Jake want with him?

"Sh, sh," Don soothed as he wrapped his arms tightly around his brother.

"You should have told me! Why did you lie to me? Why?!" Charlie screamed as he sobbed into his brother's shirt. He was going to be sick. This wasn't right. He was supposed to be safe.

"Sh, sh. You're okay." Don knew there was no point trying to explain now when his brother was so upset. Hell, he was upset. It meant Jake had been back. He had come inside his brother's home within the last 24 hours. And Charlie and Alan had been home during that time.

"Why? Why? Oh, God." Charlie suddenly let go of his brother, surprising Don. Don let go when he felt his brother fight him. Charlie rushed out of the room and out into the night.

"Charlie!" Don called as he got up from the bed. He walked toward the door, expecting his brother to be in the bathroom or perhaps in their father's arms. However, he found the front door wide open, and could see his brother running fast down the street.

Alan jumped up when he heard the front door swing open. He looked around, forgetting where he was, and realized that whoever it was had left the door open. Were they being robbed?

Then he heard Don call for Charlie. He got up and went to the front door and found Don rushing down the stairs. He looked outside and saw Charlie's small frame running away.

"Charlie!" Don shouted, ignoring his father.

"Don, what's going on?"

"Go look at Charlie's room and you'll find out." Realizing that probably wasn't good advice, Don paused a moment. "Charlie got scared. He went into his room and there was more writing. He's terrified. I have to go get him."

"Please, do."

Alan watched Don run after his brother, noticing how in shape his oldest must be in.

Charlie didn't have destination. He just wanted some place safe. Throwing all logic out the window, he ran to get away. He had to find some place safe where Jake could never find him.

"Don't bother running; I'll find you."

Jake was right behind him, whispering it in his ear. Charlie ran faster. But with each amount he increased, Jake did too. He was right on him. He couldn't escape.

A car turned the corner, aimed straight at him. Though still far enough away for Charlie to get out of the way, he stopped in his tracks, looking much like a deer in the headlights.

"TIme for round two?" Jake asked as he stepped out of the way, allowing Charlie to get hit.

Don couldn't believe his brother had stopped. Feeling the adrenaline speed him up, Don ran faster than he ever had before. He got to his brother as the car tried to swerve out of the way. Charlie screamed and Don screamed, too. He grabbed out, pulling back with all his strength. He was relieved to find that he had grabbed Charlie in time and had pulled him back.

"Ow!" Charlie cried, grabbing onto his side and his arm. He couldn't move. He couldn't breathe. Oh, God it hurt. He looked up and saw a figure standing above him in the dark. Jake would get him now! He was down. He couldn't defend himself. Someone help!

"Charlie! Oh, God. I'm sorry. Are you okay?"

Charlie saw his brother's face now, not Jake's. He sighed with relief, though even that hurt. He couldn't figure out how he hadn't felt the pain in his broken ribs as he ran. He could only say that fear and adrenaline pushed the pain away. Now, though, he was in pain. He needed help.

"Don? Help," Charlie whispered quietly, heartbrokenly. He laid his head atop his brother's thigh as Don sank down beside him.

Don pulled out his cellphone, having now remembered it. He called his father, though only a few blocks away.

"Dad, get your ass down here. Now," Don ordered, angry, but scared.

"Turn around. And watch your mouth," Alan said right before hanging up.

Don turned his attention away from his brother and saw his father's car coming toward them.

"Okay, Buddy. I'm going to lift you up and get you in the car, okay?"

"No. It'll hurt!" Charlie cried.

"I know, Buddy. I know. We have to get you to the hospital. You may have gotten hurt worse. I can't let that happen, Buddy."

"No! Please, Don! No!" Charlie screamed as Don lifted his brother up. Alan had opened the back door for them and Don placed Charlie inside. He sat in the back with him, cradling his brother's head in his lap. Charlie's tears dampened his pants, but he didn't care.

"I'm sorry, Buddy. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

Charlie shut his eyes tightly, though the tears could still spill out. He whimpered miserably. He wanted this to be over. Why did they have to take him to the hospital? He wouldn't be safe there. There was no place safe. No matter where he went, he'd be trapped, cornered. Because no matter what, Jake would find him.

Don brushed his hand across his brother's forehead and wiped at the tears that stretched across his face. He had no idea where his brother had been going, but he wanted him to stay. He couldn't let Charlie get away. He needed his brother, even if his brother didn't need him.

Alan stole a quick glance in the rearview mirror. He saw his boys huddled together. Charlie had his eyes forced shut and Don was watching him intently. They looked so fragile, so scared. He felt his throat clog with emotions. How could he comfort them? They seemed to depend on themselves or each other. Why couldn't he be a part of the support group?

They pulled into the hospital parking lot by the emergency room. Don helped Charlie out of the car, who decided he could walk to the hospital. Alan walked closely beside Charlie and Don was on Charlie's other side.

Charlie sat in one of the chairs in the ER waiting room and Don and Alan went to check him in.

"What in the world just happened?" Alan asked.

"I don't know. He just ran out. One minute I had him out of his room and back into my old room. The next he was running away like his life depended on it. I don't know what happened, but he nearly got hit by a car. I had to pull him out of the way, and, in the process, I had to toss him on the ground. I think it hurt his ribs again, and maybe his arm, too."

Alan shook his head. "Go sit with him. I'll tell them."

"Okay."

Don walked back over to Charlie, who was sitting in the corner. He was sitting so that his side was on the back of the chair. He was looking down at the floor, and that didn't change when Don walked up to him and sat down by him.

"Where were you going, Buddy?" Don asked after a few awkward minutes of silence.

Charlie just shrugged in response. He didn't have an answer. He didn't have any place in mind when he ran. He had just wanted to get away. That was it.

"Come on, Buddy. Why did you run out like that? You could have gotten hurt a lot worse.

"I don't know," he replied to his brother quietly.

"You have to have had some reason. What's going on?"

Charlie slowly turned around so his back wasn't to his brother anymore. He didn't meet Don's eyes, but he at least began to speak to him.

"I just wanted to get away. I'm tired of not being safe. There had to be some place safe, some place where Jake couldn't get to me. I just couldn't find it. So I ran. I figured eventually I'd find it. But Jake found me first."

"What? Charlie, I never saw him."

Charlie nodded. "It was my shadow," he whispered.

Don leaned forward and grabbed onto his brother's head, forcing his face close to his own.

"Tell me, Charlie. What can I do? What can I do to fix this? What can I do to make this stop? Please, Charlie, tell me! I'll do anything. Just... tell me."

Charlie met his brother's gaze with a stoney face. He felt no emotion. He was detached from the pain. It was what made looking Don in the eye so easy. It was what made telling him the truth so easy.

"There's nothing you can do... unless you can figure out a way to kill Jake."

Don's face lost all color, so Charlie turned away, unable to look at his brother. Don stood almost mechanically and walked away.

Alan came back to where his boys were, except he found that one was missing. He sat down beside Charlie and asked him where Don was.

Charlie shrugged his shoulders. He didn't have an answer. He didn't know where Don had gone.

"Did you say something to him?"

Charlie didn't give his father a response. He fiddled with a corner of the cushion on his chair that had come up and worked to get it back in place.

Alan sighed. His son had gone off the deep end. It was his other brood mood, the one he worked so hard to keep his son out of. What could he do to get him back this time? And what happened to Don?

Unusual for the LA region, the emergency room was nearly empty. Charlie was taken back soon after they arrived and Alan decided to look for Don.

It wasn't hard to find his son. He had gone outside and sat on a bench close to the entrance. Alan didn't notice the tears and sobs until he sat down beside Don.

"Donnie?"

Don sobbed and ran his hand under his eyes before he was able to answer. "I can't. I'm useless, Dad. Charlie's going to get hurt again, and there's nothing I can do to stop it."

Alan gathered his oldest son in his arms. Don shook and cried against his father, feeling like such a failure. Charlie was right. There was nothing he could do, unless he could figure out a way to catch Jake. And so far he hadn't. He couldn't figure out how to save his brother. Maybe it was because this case became personal. He never had a problem like this with a case before. But this time, when it really mattered to him, he couldn't figure out how to save his brother. What was he going to do? He couldn't just wait around for his brother to get hurt again, but that's what it felt like. It felt like that was all he could do because he hadn't made any progress with catching Jake. It was as though he was just a ghost, vanishing in and out of the real world. It didn't make sense. He had been caught so easily once before. Why couldn't that be the case now?

"Sh, Donny. Sh. It'll be okay," Alan comforted. He hated seeing Don throw in the towel like this. His son wasn't the kind of person who gave up easily. Something had changed, and it scared Alan.

"What happened, Don?" Alan asked when Don seemed to calm down a bit, at least on the outside.

"Charlie... God, he was right."

"About what? What did he say?"

Don turned his gaze to his father's and Alan could see the broken heart in their depths. "He said that there was nothing I could do to save him, unless I could figure out a way to kill Jake. And, I don't know how to do that. I can't catch him. And if I can't, that means he'll still be free and he can get Charlie. There's nothing I can do to stop that."

Alan wasn't sure how to respond to that. Changing the subject, he directed their attention back to Charlie. "Let's go back in. Charlie should be done soon."

And he was. Charlie's ribs had to be taped. Luckily his arm hadn't received any further damage except for a few bruises. By three o'clock, they were all back home.

"Now, get into bed, and you get into bed," Alan ordered as he pointed at both his sons.

Don took the couch, since his old bed was being used and no one should go into Charlie's room since it was once again a crime scene. He'd have to remember to call it in in the morning. For now, he just wanted to sleep. He figured that would be the only way to make the misery go away.

Charlie moaned as he stretched out on his bed. He rested on his right side and clung to one of his pillows as he hugged it to his chest. He pressed his cheek against it and tears spilled down his face and onto its cover. There was no way he was going to get to sleep now, and he found that after laying awake for an hour.

He decided to get up and he tiptoed down the steps. He saw Don laying on the couch, looking peacefully asleep. Good for him, Charlie thought.

"Charlie?"

Charlie jumped at the sound of his brother's voice. He thought he was asleep.

"What are you doing up?" Don asked as he pushed himself up into a sitting position.

"Couldn't sleep," he answered.

Don smiled softly. "Yeah, me either." He motioned with his hand for Charlie to come over. Charlie moved to the couch and sat by him. Don put his arm around Charlie and just sat there with his brother. How could he let anything happen to him? But how could he prevent it? He already had agents watching the house and following Charlie. What more could he do?

"I'm sorry," Charlie whispered, looking out across the living room, anywhere except for his brother's face.

"For what?"

"For hurting you, for making you feel like a bad brother. I don't mean to. I know you'll catch Jake. I didn't mean to suggest otherwise."

Don couldn't respond. He felt tears spill down his face and he bit his lower lip to keep from crying out. He rested his head on top of Charlie's and stayed there for a long while.

"Why are you crying?" Charlie asked once he noticed the moisture hitting his head.

"I'm sorry, Buddy. I'm not doing a very good job of protecting you, am I?" Don asked with a joyless laugh.

"Yes, you are. Nothing's happened since I got hit by the car. Sure, he's been in my house, but he hasn't touched me."

"Yeah, not physically. You can't tell me he hasn't gotten to you. It's written all over your face and I wasn't able to protect you from that."

"You didn't make me go into my room. You tried to keep me from it. I was the one who made the stupid mistake of going in there."

Charlie paused a moment, realizing something. "Why didn't you tell me that it looked like that? Why did you lie to me?"

Don squeezed Charlie a moment, pressing him tighter against him. "I-I didn't lie to you. He had just written, 'Welcome home, Eppes.' That changed, though, and I didn't know it... He's been back here, and probably while you've been home."

Charlie doubled over, holding his stomach. He fought off the wave of nausea and was able to keep from throwing up.

"Are you okay?" Don asked as he rubbed circles on Charlie's back.

"This is crazy, you know that? This should not be happening."

"I know... but it is."

Why couldn't that change? Why did it have to be him? Sure, he wouldn't wish this on anyone else, but he still didn't want it to be happening to him. It was awful. It was haunting. It stole his attention and changed him. He was emotionally fragile, and terrified of every little thing because he was always afraid it was Jake. He was never relaxed, always on edge. He was ready for this to be over, but it was far from it. What would happen when it was all over? The answer scared him because it was an unknown. He liked knowing what to expect. That definitely wasn't the case this time.

Don pulled Charlie back so that he was sitting by him again. He got up and pulled Charlie with him and led him back to his old room. He forced Charlie down onto the bed and waited for him to get under the covers. Then he sat on the edge of the bed and returned his brother's gaze.

"I'm going to keep an eye on you, okay? I'll make sure nothing happens."

"Why? You need sleep, too," Charlie said quietly, already getting sleepy.

"Yeah, I know. But I can't let anything happen to you tonight. So you're stuck with me." Don moved to the closet and pulled out an old sleeping bag he'd left there. Charlie threw an extra pillow on the floor for him.

"Thanks. Good night, Buddy."

"'Night."

Don smiled as he soon heard the light snores coming from his brother. He stretched out and got comfortable. He knew he'd fall asleep easily, too. He had lied to Charlie. He had been sound asleep when Charlie came downstairs, but he figured Charlie wouldn't want to bother him if he said he had just woke up again.

Maybe he could offer his brother some feeling of safety by being in the same room as him. He hoped so, because from what he could tell, it was the only comfort he was able to give his brother.

**Well, this is pretty long for me, so I hope you're happy with that. I figured I'd take my time a little with this because I really don't know when I'll be able to update again. This week is finals' week, so I won't have time during the week to write. And this Friday I'll be at school all day and when I get home, I'll be there for a few hours and then we'll be on the road for 12-14 hours since we're going on vacation. And we'll be on vacation until Wednesday. Soooo, I don't know what's going to happen. I guess we'll just have to see how this plays out. I hope you guys will survive without it for a while. I promise that I will write the chapter down while I'm on vacation so I can update fairly quickly when I get back. Okay? I'll miss you!**


	12. I'm Not Strong Enough

Alan forced his sons to stay home the next day. Don only took a moment to call in the crime scene unit and then was forced back into bed. He and Charlie spent most of the day asleep, which didn't bother Don in the least.

Around four o'clock, Don couldn't take any more of it, though. He knew he needed to get to work and do something half-way productive. It was fine catching up on sleep so he would be at the top of his game, but now that he was rested, it was time to actually put his energy to work.

He knew his father would never let him out the front door. He could hardly believe he was going to use his teenage-hood escape route. The only problem with that was that Charlie would see him leave. He just hoped his brother would be kind enough to let him go. Don could remember his brother keeping his secrets before when they were younger. Hopefully that would be the case now, too.

Charlie was awake when Don slipped into his old room. He watched his older brother come inconspicuously inside and had to smile. He knew his brother was up to something; he just didn't know what.

"What are you up to?" Charlie asked.

"Sh," Don said, thinking his brother's voice was much too loud. He was afraid his father would hear, though he was downstairs in the living room. He had escaped by telling his father he was going to check on Charlie. He was tempted to make an escape with someone from the crime scene unit, or even Colby, who had come by a few hours ago.

"Well?" Charlie asked, whispering this time.

"Okay, I'm sneaking out."

Charlie had to cover his mouth to keep from laughing too loudly.

"Shut up," Don said, smiling, too.

"How old are you again?"

Don lightly punched his brother's shoulder, and was surprised to get a punch back.

"So, what escape route are you taking this time? If I remember correctly, you had several when we were in high school."

"The main exit, of course." Don gestured to the window.

Charlie shook his head. "You're pathetic."

"Well, I can't just sit here and do nothing, Charlie! I have a job, and it's pretty important. Sometimes I think Dad forgets that."

Charlie's face drained of color. He couldn't believe his brother said that, no matter how little thought he had put into it. He and Alan understood all too well how important Don's job was, and it was because of that that they worried so much. How could Don think for a moment the importance of his job left Alan's mind? Charlie was just thankful that their father hadn't heard Don say that.

"What? What did I say?" Don asked, seeing the emotions on his brother's face.

"Nothing... nothing. You should probably go before Dad catches you."

Don frowned. It wasn't nothing. That much was obvious. "Tell me."

Charlie looked off to the side, avoiding his brother. "Dad and I never, for a second, forget the importance of your job. That's why we worry. That's why Mom worried. We know what your job means, and we know the risk. Knowing that you're good at your job allows us some comfort. But we're always scared, Don. We're always afraid that one of these days someone is going to show up on our doorstep, or give us the call that we don't want to get. Don't you think that maybe Dad wants you close, where he knows where you are, because then he knows you're safe? That way he doesn't have to worry for a while?"

Don felt regret already. He sank down on the bed beside Charlie, who moved his knees up to his chest to leave room for Don to sit.

"You really worry that much?"

Charlie had to fight to keep from rolling his eyes. "Of course! Don, it may not be every day, but you get shot at. We don't know what days you will and what days you won't. Sometimes you're put in even more dangerous situations. It's scary. I know you don't think about it because you're used to it by now. You just think it's part of the job. But it's something that we can't get used to. Getting a call that you've been shot, or injured on the job, doesn't make us think, 'Oh, it's just another injury.' No, we think, 'That's one more time that we could have lost him.' No matter how many times you get hurt on the job, that'll just make us think that we were that much closer to losing you."

Charlie felt like he could be crying. In many other instances he would be. But he was angry. He was telling the truth to his brother, a truth that he couldn't believe Don didn't realize. It seemed so obvious to him, and probably to Alan too. It was harder on Charlie and Alan, living with Don's job, than it was for Don himself. That didn't seem right, but it was how it was. Don had to worry about getting killed or hurt. Charlie and Alan had to worry about losing him forever. They would be the ones left behind. They would be the ones who would have to live without him. They'd already gone through it with losing Margaret. The last thing they wanted was to go through it over Don.

"Buddy... you don't need to worry about that. I don't want you to-"

"You think that's going to make a difference?! Don, we're your family. We're not going to stop worrying every time the phone rings and you're not with us just because you 'don't want us to.' Can't you see that?"

Don nodded solemnly. He was just trying to explain to his brother that there was no need, that he was good enough at his job that there was no need to worry. But it was obviously a delicate situation with his brother. Maybe there was more to it. Don didn't think now was the time to ask, though.

"I'm sorry, Buddy. I-I didn't mean for you to have to worry so much."

Charlie gave his brother a small smile to show he wasn't angry any more. "It's okay. You get used to worrying after the first decade or so."

"Charlie..."

"You'd better go before Dad comes up here."

Charlie turned on his side, though at the moment it hurt. He wouldn't show it to Don. He just didn't want to face his brother any longer. Don would try to fix it, and he would... for a little while. But Don couldn't change the fact that he and their father would worry. It was something they lived with every day. And, yes, to some extent they were okay with it. Fear never went away, though. Worrying never stopped. It was just pushed down on the list of what they were doing after a while. Charlie didn't think about it every second away from Don. Things like phone calls and stories on the news triggered the fear. Worrying was just a constant that became like breathing. He didn't really think about it and he didn't really recognize it anymore.

"Okay. I'll see you later, Buddy."

Don squeezed Charlie's shoulder and made his climb down the side of the house, thankful that there were no other windows on that side of the house.

Charlie's words hit home. He couldn't imagine quitting his job over it. He'd always known his family would worry. He had taken that into consideration before he chose this career. But he couldn't help that he loved his job. He couldn't guarantee that he'd be safe, and there was no point telling his family that. It made him realize he had to be more careful for their sake. He wouldn't be overly careful to the point that he couldn't even do his job, but he could take some extra precautions.

He was able to drive away and without getting caught by his father. But the image of his brother watching him leave from the upstairs window stayed with him and tore at his heart.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alan looked out the window and watched Don drive away. He suspected something was up and, knowing his son was a capable adult, he let Don go through with his decision to leave. He couldn't very well stop him, no matter how much he wanted to. It would be much nicer that way for him, but his happiness wasn't what mattered.

There were so many times he just wanted to stop his son, make him stay forever. Alan shuddered at the memory of his wife begging him to do something.

_"Alan! Alan, do something! You can't just let him walk out like that! He was shot. We can't let him go back to that job and get hurt again, can we? Stop him!"_

_"No, Margaret."_

_Alan walked away from the window, where he had been standing as he watched his son drive away. Don had stayed with them momentarily since he had been injured on the job. Now that he was better, he was gone again._

_"Alan! Alan! Go after him! Please! Don't you care about your son? Do you want him to get shot?" Margaret latched onto Alan's arm, trying to pull her husband toward the door so he could go after her baby._

_"No! Margaret, I can't stop him. This was Don's choice, not mine. He loves his job. One bullet isn't going to stop him. You're going to have to get used to that."_

_For the first time in over 25 years of marriage, Margaret struck her husband with a sharp slap across the face. The two just stood there, staring at each other in disbelief. Alan reached a hand up to his face and gingerly touched it._

_"Oh, honey!" Margaret pushed herself into her husband's arms. She wrapped her arms around him and held on tight. "I'm so sorry."_

_Alan slowly returned the embrace. "It's okay. This was the first time. It'll get easier after a while."_

_Margaret shuddered in her husband's arms. The idea that there would be more instances like this terrified her. But Alan was right. She would get used to it. Some how she would learn to deal with this every day of her life._

_Little did either of them know, Charlie had witnessed the whole thing from the stairs. He silently cried there until his parents embraced. He then slowly made his way back upstairs and cried in his room._

Alan shook his head sadly at the remembrance. It had been the first time he and Margaret had truly let go over their son because they both knew then that they weren't capable of protecting him anymore. They couldn't make him quit his job. And they certainly couldn't protect him while he was working. So they had to let him go and just pray every day that he would be safe.

Charlie slowly came down the stairs and saw his father looking out the window. He smiled sadly at the look on Alan's face.

"You saw that, huh?" he asked quietly as he came over to the couch where his father sat.

"I just wanted him to be home... just for a while longer."

Charlie's heart raced at the thought of how well he knew his father. The only problem was that Don didn't know him as well. If only Don knew, he would have stayed home.

"I suppose he's where he's needed." Alan finally tore his gaze off the street and turned to his son and smiled. "We just have to wait for our next turn."

Charlie's smile diminished at his father's statement. "You know we always come first in his life."

"Do we? It doesn't seem that way. I mean, to think of what your mother went through over him..." Alan let his sentence trail off, going back to that day. This time, he brought Charlie with him.

Charlie could remember seeing his parents that day when Don left. His heart nearly broke just at the way his mother cried, and, though eighteen, he cried too. There was nothing he could do to make her feel better. He had nearly shouted when Margaret struck Alan. It had shocked him. He sat on the stairs, hand covering his mouth, and stared as they stared at one another. It was more than he could handle. He never wanted them to fight like that again. It made his stomach sick.

After going up to his room, Charlie laid across his bed and sobbed. He hadn't been aware of the fact that his brother had been shot, not at first at least. It hadn't been until his mom had slipped and said something about it that he knew. He couldn't look at his brother the same way after that. Sure, he hadn't really gotten the chance to treat Don any certain way. Every time he tried to start a conversation with his older brother, Don complained that he was too tired. It made him feel guilty later that he had spent time bothering his brother when he needed rest.

Much like his parents, Charlie began to worry constantly about his brother. Though he knew so much, he hadn't known how dangerous working for the FBI was going to be. It just didn't make sense to him. And now, knowing his brother could potentially get shot and killed, he couldn't seem to get Don off his mind.

Charlie remembered how much he had pestered his older brother for weeks after that.

_"Don, it's me," Charlie spoke. Don had just left hours before, but he knew he'd be home by then, and he was right._

_"Hey, Charlie. What's up? Everything okay?" Don's voice sounded gentle, but Charlie heard the underlining annoyance._

_"Um, I... I just wanted to know you made it home okay."_

_"Oh. Well, yeah, I'm fine. Was that it? You do realize this is long-distance, right?"_

_"That doesn't matter anymore." Charlie felt tears come to his eyes but he made sure his brother wouldn't find out he was crying._

_"Well, I should go, Buddy, okay? Tell Mom and Dad I made it home all right. I'll talk to you later."_

_"Okay, bye, Donnie."_

_"Bye."_

_Before Don hung up, Charlie had wanted to say "I love you," but Don had already hung up before he'd even said "I."_

_Charlie placed the phone back into its cradle shakily. He couldn't imagine how he was going to live with the knowledge that his brother could be killed. The risk was always there, of course. But it was so high for his brother. How could Charlie not think about it every minute of every day? How could he not call his brother on a regular basis to make sure he was okay? And if he didn't get a hold of him, how could Charlie keep himself from running to his brother?_

Thinking back now, Charlie was thankful he had never actually gone to Don when he hadn't reached him. After a while, Don had called their parents and they had put a stop to Charlie's constant calls. It made Charlie feel worse, not knowing. The fear had been too much for him to the point that he began to have panic attacks. His parents had taken him to get therapy, and after a month of treatment, he was okay. With sudden alarm, Charlie realized his brother didn't know about that. Would it help any if he told him?

After spending over two years consulting for the FBI, Charlie had a taste of how much danger his brother was in. Yes, there were times where it was worse, but considering there had been so few incidents where Don was hurt, it made him much more comfortable about his brother's safety. Still, he couldn't stop worrying about his brother. If nothing else, he worried more because now, if Don got hurt, he could be to blame.

Alan focused on his son's face, coming out of the past. He could see the thoughts rolling in his son's head. Something was going on. "Charlie?"

Charlie flinched a little as he was brought back to reality. "Yeah, Dad?"

"What happened?"

"Nothing. Why?"

"You seem lost in your own world again."

Charlie chuckled. "I have a tendency to do that, don't I?"

Alan smiled, too, but then paused. He didn't want Charlie to be changing the subject on him. "Seriously, son. What is it?"

"I was just thinking about the way it was... when Don first got shot. You never told him what happened to me, did you?"

Alan shook his head. "No. At the time, your mother and I decided against telling him so he wouldn't feel any pressures to change jobs or to come home. We knew that Don was independent, so we didn't want that to change. Besides, it was information you could tell him, not us."

Charlie nodded in understanding. "I never told him... Should I?"

"That's up for you to decide. If you think it's something Don should know, you should tell him. It's up to you, though."

Alan patted his son on top of the head as he stood to go into the kitchen, leaving his son lost in thought. In ways he wanted Charlie to tell Don, but he still had the same feelings he did years before. He didn't want Don to feel any pressures in his job. He knew he was stressed enough. Then again, Don didn't have much of a grasp as to what went on when he was away and how it affected his family. Something like that would definitely bring things into focus.

He was sure Charlie would choose the right decision in the end, whatever decision that may be.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After dinner that night, Charlie decided to sit outside. He had expected Don to come back to eat, but he hadn't shown up. In ways it was probably for the best, considering he still didn't know whether to tell Don about therapy or not. It was a hard decision. He didn't want his brother to think he was just using it to make him stay around more, or make him feel guilty. The only reasons he could see to tell him were because he wanted to be honest with his brother and to make him understand just what he went through when he worried about him.

He rested his head against the back of the porch swing and closed his eyes. He was startled when he heard someone say his name.

Quickly opening his eyes, he found Janet Waits standing at the end of the porch. Feeling his pulse race, Charlie stared wide-eyed at her.

"What are you doing here?" he hissed, not wanting to be too loud.

"Well, we still need to talk, and I haven't heard from you in a while."

Suddenly appearing at his side, an agent ran up to the porch. "Dr. Eppes, do you know this woman?"

"Yes, it's okay. She's safe. Thank you."

The agent nodded, looked suspiciously at Janet, and then jogged off again.

"Wow. You have agents on you?"

"Yes, thanks to your son's friend Jake."

"Oh, I'm sorry. He always seemed the angrier of the two. But he rarely acted upon his rage. Maybe that will benefit you."

Charlie couldn't help but chuckle at that statement. He wouldn't go into details with this woman, but her statement was laughable. Jake hadn't eased up on him.

"Couldn't you have called? What if my father sees you?"

"Calm down, Mr. Eppes. I'm not here to sabotage your life. I just want to make sure you'll keep your promise."

"Yes, of course. When would you want to get together? Sometime next week would work best for me."

"Fine. How about Tuesday at three o'clock? I'll meet you at CalSci."

"That... that works for me."

"Good. I'll see you then."

"Bye."

Charlie watched her turn and walk away and whispered a curse beneath his breath when he saw his brother's car come into view and turn into the driveway.

"Hey, who was that?" Don asked as he stepped up onto the porch.

"Just someone out for a late walk. We made small talk for a minute."

"Oh, okay. We have any food left? I'm starving."

"Yeah, I'm sure Dad has leftovers for you."

"Great. Come eat with me."

"I just ate, though."

Don rolled his eyes. "You don't have to eat anything. Just sit with me."

"O-okay."

"Come on." Don helped Charlie up and walked with him inside the house. Charlie wasn't sure what he'd tell his brother, if he'd tell him anything. He could see on Don's face that he wanted to talk. That was fine by him, but would he add to the conversation what happened to him years ago?

Even Charlie didn't know.

**Okay, another tiny cliffhanger. I apologize. However, I finished my last quarter which was SUCH a hectic one. This one should be much easier and so I should be able to update faster. My vacation was really fun. I'm sorry I wasn't able to update sooner. It seems like more things have come up since I've been home! I hope you like this chapter, though it's kinda short. Let me know if you think it's kinda detached from this storyline. I really want your input on this one because I felt something was different with this one. Let me know, okay?**


	13. To Make It Through

Charlie reluctantly followed his brother inside. He wanted more time to figure out what he wanted to tell Don. There had to be a perfect choice, a reason that would benefit both in the situation. But what was he going to choose? How would he know which one was the best option?

Slowly he came up to his brother and sat beside his chair at the table. He tried to take advantage of the few extra moments to think of what to tell Don as his brother went into the kitchen to heat up leftovers. On the one hand, it made sense because he wouldn't be lying to his brother. Don would get a better understanding about how difficult it had been in the beginning for his family to live with knowing how much danger Don faced.

But what if Don didn't see it that way? What if he figured that Charlie was just saying it to make Don feel guilty? That was not his intention. It never had been, but he could understand why Don would see it that way. He couldn't imagine having such a fight with his brother about it. He didn't want that to happen, so he figured he shouldn't risk bringing it up. But his gut kept telling him to tell Don.

Hearing the ding of the microwave, Charlie expected his brother's entrance again. Don came walking back in with a beer and a plate of that night's dinner of steak and a baked potato. As usual, Don had smothered his steak in sauce, while Charlie never even put so much as salt on his.

Don sat down after placing his food in front of him. He picked at the food for a minute, then gave up and looked at his brother.

"I... I don't really know what went on this morning, but I need to talk about it with you. Buddy, I need you to explain. I've been an agent for well over ten years now. I wouldn't go so far as to say that I've been oblivious to your worrying, but I never seemed to think it was as bad as you made it out to be. I can't believe I haven't seen it before, but now that you've brought it up, I can't just pretend like it was the way it had been before. I took Dad, Mom, and you into consideration when I decided I wanted to be an FBI agent, but I didn't think it would be too hard on you or I never would have done it."

"That's not true. You were born to be an agent. It's what you had to do."

"Please, Buddy. I need to understand. What do you worry about? What goes on when I'm not around?"

Charlie swallowed hard and his Adam's apple bobbed. It seemed as if Don was basically asking him to tell him about what went on when Don first got shot. Is that what it meant? Was he supposed to tell Don?

"There, um... there was a time when things got really bad, when you first got shot." Charlie felt the emotions threaten to overtake him, so he paused to fight it away.

"What happened?" Don asked gently. His eyes took in his brother's every expression. He could see Charlie was taking everything into account, and he realized that he was the main thing he was factoring in.

"After you left, Mom... she just broke down. Dad was the only one who showed some strength, but even he was struggling with it. Mom begged him to stop you, to make you quit your job. She couldn't stand you being in harm's way. She wanted you home, safe with her. Dad refused. He was the only one who understood at the time that this would be the worst experience for us, but it would get better later. Mom was so... so upset. She hit Dad."

Don could barely register that. His mother had never raised her hand to anyone. He had never seen her strike another human. She wasn't violent. She was gentle and compassionate. Never did Margaret Eppes get that upset with someone.

"That bad, huh?" Don whispered, feeling his own emotions coming on strong. He bowed his head, staring at his hands. What did it mean? What was he supposed to do?

Charlie paused, wondering if he should stop the story there. "It gets worse."

Don lifted his head and looked at his brother. He took a deep breath, preparing himself for the worst since he thought what he had heard was already bad enough. "Go on."

With his brother's permission, Charlie now continued. "Remember when I called you, about as soon as you got home after leaving?"

Don searched his memory for that and vaguely remembered it.

"Yes."

"And then I called a lot after that? You stopped answering after so long." Charlie chuckled softly, realizing he must have been such a pest. "Well, it was for my own sanity, really. I... I had to hear from you. I had to know you were okay. After I found out you got shot, I just couldn't live with not knowing how you were. I just saw you getting shot in any day-to-day life. Your job seemed like war to me, and knowing that, I was afraid you'd get shot down. I was terrified... to the point where I was having panic attacks. I didn't have any until you stopped answering your calls.

"Looking back now, I don't blame you for not answering. It was taking precious time out of your day. I shouldn't have been bothering you so much."

"Don't apologize," Don said softly, shaking his head.

"Well, um, I just was so afraid you were going to get hurt that it put a physical strain on my health. I couldn't eat right, I couldn't think of anything else. Finally... Mom and Dad took me to therapy."

Don stared at Charlie as those words sunk in. Therapy? Had it really been that bad? He could hardly imagine anyone getting so worked up over him. He wasn't that important was he? He and Charlie hadn't even been that close back then.

"I was okay after about a month. I finally came to grips with your job and was able to keep myself from calling you every day. It was hard though because I was still afraid, but I found ways to keep my mind off it. I went back to a 'normal' life. Sure, I was scared to death with the next phone call that you'd been hurt, but it wasn't until a couple years later that that happened. Like I said earlier, after the first decade you start to get used to it."

Don was still trying to process the fact that he was that important to his brother that he was having panic attacks over him, he had to go to therapy because of him. Had he really caused that much of a strain on his brother? Even though at the time getting away from Charlie seemed nice, Don was still close enough to his brother that he wouldn't allow that to happen. He would have made more of an effort in contacting him. He would have sent him letters, emails, reassuring him that he was all right... and they would have had a serious discussion about it. Don could have made it all right on his own. He wouldn't have had to have some therapist do it. Together, the Eppes brothers could have worked it out together. Imagining his little brother fighting it out alone made Don sick to his stomach with guilt.

"I... I'm so sorry, Buddy."

"Don't apologize, Don... please. I didn't mean for that when I told you. That wasn't my intention. You wanted to understand how hard it was. To me, that was the perfect example. I'm not saying it's that hard all the time, but that's how it started out. Now, it's... it's better because I have an understanding of what goes on in your job. I know you're not in danger 24/7, like I seemed to think. It's also worse in ways since I know what you are up against that is worse than guns. But I'm okay, Don, really. I know Dad is too. We just like it a lot more when we know where you are, when you're with us. It makes us stop worrying, and it's nice to have that break in between the worry."

Charlie may not have wanted Don to feel guilty, but he did. He didn't mean to cause his family worry or pain. Knowing all the times he could have come home, caused his family a little less worry, made Don feel even worse. It bothered him mostly about his mother. He hadn't gotten a chance to apologize to her about it and during her life when he was an agent, he hadn't come home nearly as often as he did now. If he hadn't spent those last few months with her, he didn't know how he'd live with himself. She had deserved better.

"Mom understood, Don," Charlie said quietly, as though reading his brother's thoughts.

Don looked into Charlie's eyes, looking for some sign that he was lying. In ways he wanted him to be because he didn't deserve to be let off the hook that easy, but it seemed he was. Charlie didn't lie easily. Sure, he had managed to lie about Carl and Jake, but this was different. This wasn't something to lie about.

"I hope you're right," Don whispered quietly.

"I know I am, Don." Charlie reached out and laid his hand on his brother's arm, trying to show his brother that he was there for him and that he wouldn't lie to him... at least over something like that.

"I am sorry, Buddy. I know you didn't mean to make me feel guilty or anything, but I do. I wish I had known. I'm so sorry you had to go through therapy because of me... Am I really that important to you?"

Charlie laughed at the absurdness of his brother's question.

"Take a second and ask yourself the same question. If I was in danger every day, what would happen to you?"

Don thought for only a second before knowing exactly what he would do. He gave his brother a timid smile. "I would worry my ass off and probably panic."

"Exactly." Charlie smiled at his brother, hoping he got the point now.

"We would do it for each other, no matter which one of us it was. You were just the lucky one who got to be worried about, rather than one of the ones who got to worry. It's okay, Don. Really."

Realizing how hard it was for his modest brother to admit that he had missed him and worried so much about him, Don had to sit back and look at his brother. Charlie never ceased to amaze him. He knew that his brother must have fought with himself about telling him. If he hadn't told him in over ten years, there had to be some doubt about whether he should tell Don or not. Understanding the hardness of that choice, Don smiled proudly at his brother.

"What?" Charlie asked, sick of being under his brother's scrutinizing gaze.

"I don't get you."

Charlie shook his head. "Well, that's been apparent for thirty years."

Don chuckled softly. "No, I mean I don't get how you find it in yourself every time to choose something that will benefit everyone; and a lot of times it benefits everyone except you. You knew that I could have gotten mad about you not telling me about you going to therapy. You knew that you could have been hurt if I got mad at you about it. Yet you still told me and made the right choice. I don't get you. I don't understand how you can do it."

Charlie shrugged sheepishly. "I just try to do whatever...feels right, I guess."

"Well, you're always dead on, Brother."

Charlie smiled at his brother and looked down at the plate in front of Don.

"You didn't get to eat a thing."

Don smiled widely. "I ate something before I got here."

"What? Then how come you bothered to heat that up? You just wasted good food!"

"Well, I needed time to think first. I had to get my thoughts in order."

Charlie nodded. "Yeah, I guess that helped me, too. I needed a little more time, too."

"See? So what's the fuss?"

"The fuss is, young man, that you just wasted food that starving children who haven't been adopted by Angelina Jolie would enjoy," Alan said as he walked into the room.

Charlie laughed out and Don could barely contain his smile, though he knew his father was somehow managing to be serious.

"I didn't know you were so informed on the latest gossip, Dad," Charlie got out through the laughter.

"Hush, that wasn't the point. I wasn't trying to be funny."

"Well, it was, Dad," Don put in.

"Fine, it was hilarious. You'd better take that plate with you to your apartment. You should eat it there."

"Aw, man," Don complained, though a wink to his brother showed that he wasn't being serious.

Charlie couldn't speak the relief he felt that his brother wasn't mad at him. It was what he worried about the most. Knowing that he had nothing to fear now, he felt much better.

Then he remembered Jake wanted to kill him... maybe he had a little more to fear than he thought.  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The time before Charlie was to meet Janet seemed to go by quickly. He knew he'd never be truly prepared to see her. He hoped he wouldn't have to worry about her, but he still kept his cell phone close by. He waited in front of CalSci for her to show up. Right on time, she was there.

Thankfully, for Charlie, Don was away at a crime scene so he wouldn't be stopping by CalSci. Charlie had planned to take Janet far away from there so he wouldn't see anyone he knew who would ask about her. He couldn't think of a way to explain to someone that she was the mother of the man he had killed.

"Hi, Dr. Eppes." Janet walked up to him with a smile on her face. Charlie realized she couldn't be any older than his father. How old had Carl been?

"Hi. Come with me. I know where we can go."

"Of course." Janet followed the professor, hoping her more submissive attitude would help affect his opinion of her. She wouldn't make demands, not today. This was about Carl.

He deserved to have his story told. She hated the look of hatred in the young man's eyes when she spoke of her son. Charles Eppes had good reason to hate him, but she wanted that to change.

Charlie opened the door of his car for the woman and let her in. Shutting the door for her, he then went to his side of the car and got in. He didn't know how to make conversation with this woman, so he was thankful when she started.

"I'm sorry that I have been so persistent with this. I take it you don't have any children?"

Charlie couldn't imagine that. What if he had? What would Carl have done to them? "No, I don't have any children."

"Well, then I suppose it is hard for you to understand. See, I know my son. He was never a bad boy until he was kidnapped. You can imagine how it affected all of us. Rarely parents are lucky enough that if their child is kidnapped that they get them back."

"It's not that rare," Charlie put in, defending the FBI. He had worked on kidnapping cases before. They had all been safely returned.

"Of course." Janet wouldn't argue with him, but she had done her research at the time. She probably shouldn't have because she had lost hope waiting on Carl to be returned to her. "Anyway, it made Carl even more dear to us."

"I'm sure." Charlie tried to keep the bitter and angry tone out of his voice. This was Carl's mother. She hadn't been the one who had actually hurt him, threatened him and his family. Still, she was responsible for bringing him into the world.

"Apparently all the love we gave him didn't work. He was distant, cold. He never said something happened while he was kidnapped, though I assumed something had. He was fifteen at the time. Before, he was kind, gentle. He was too shy to talk to anyone at his school really. He didn't even have any friends. He tried to hang around his brother, but Todd was one of the popular students. He couldn't be seen with his little brother, you know."

Charlie nodded. He did know what that was like. Don wasn't necessarily the most popular student in their high school, but he had been the star of the baseball team and led his team to many wins. Charlie had been too young for high school with no one his age and no friends. He had been a lost, terrified little boy and his beloved older brother spent a minimal amount of time with him. All Charlie had wanted was to be around someone he knew, someone he trusted. But Don convinced him to stay away. Charlie shook his head. He wasn't in high school any more. Don wasn't like that any more. He tried to concentrate on Janet's words.

"I think Carl accepted that. He didn't seem bitter or anything by it. But later, he seemed really spiteful toward his brother. After he was kidnapped, he became friends with Jake. His father and I encouraged them because we wanted Carl to have a friend. We didn't realize it was going to turn into such a lasting relationship.

"Jake was always... different. He got Carl into trouble a lot at first, but then he rubbed off on Carl so that Carl was getting Jake in trouble, too. I didn't know what to make of it, but they were inseparable. We couldn't tell them they couldn't be friends anymore.

"After high school, Carl didn't want to go to school anymore. Being an adult, my husband and I knew we couldn't stop him. I'm still not quite sure what my son did. He and Jake went into business together for a while. I don't know what for. Then Carl just started living off welfare. He and Jake were still friends.

"Meanwhile, my son Todd got married to a lovely woman named Lana while he was working as a coast guard. Around the time Lana was due to give birth to their first child, Todd was reported missing."

Janet stopped to get a tissue out of her pocket. She daintily wiped her eyes and blew her nose before continuing.

"Anyway, they never found his body... until a few months ago."

"You do know what happened, don't you?" Charlie asked her.

Janet blinked at him. "What do you mean?"

Charlie sighed as he pulled the car into the parking lot of the oceanfront restaurant he'd driven them to. He had a feeling she didn't know by the way she talked about Carl and Todd. She seemed to be very praising of both. How was he supposed to break this news to her?

"What is it?" she asked, concerned. What did this man know about her sons that she didn't?

"While Carl was kidnapped, Todd was kidnapped, too. Todd had a chance to save Carl, but he chose not to. That's why Carl killed him."

Janet stared blankly at Charlie for several moments before breathing a short, relieved sigh. "Is that all? My, I thought you were going to tell me something serious."

Coming not a moment too soon, Charlie's cell phone rang. He had told Larry to call him at 3:45 and he would say something that didn't make sense. It was an escape route, in case he needed it.

"Hello... Yeah, Don... Really?... Okay, I'll be there soon. Bye," Charlie's end of the conversation sounded.

He turned to Janet with an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, but I have to cut this short. Maybe we can meet again some other time?"

"That would be fine."

"Um, where can I take you?"

"The bus station would be fine. I was dropped off at CalSci, so I can head straight home."

"Oh, okay. Well, again, I'm sorry."

Charlie was more than happy when Janet was out of his car. He just couldn't understand that woman. She knew about her sons? And she was okay with it? He was starting to think a restraining order sounded more and more appealing. He wasn't sure if he could talk to this woman any longer. He thought her son was bad. But if she was okay with her son killing his brother, who knew what kind of trouble she would be for him?

**You know, I should just shut up about when I can update, shouldn't I? It's probably getting on your nerves! This quarter does seem more relaxed than last but with the holiday and 5 assignments that needed done, I just didn't have enough time to get this done before a week went by. I'm so sorry about that.**

**ATTENTION BONES FANS: (as in the TV show) I would like to discuss an idea for this story that happened on Bones. If you have any free time, review or send me a message if you're willing to help me with it. I want to know if you think it would be a good idea for this story or not. I'll make sure you saw the episode I'm talking about first, then we can discuss it later. Any help is greatly appreciated!  
Thanks!**


	14. What I Did Was A Mistake

Charlie gladly returned to CalSci. He was done with classes for the day, but he had left his things there. Larry was in his office when he walked in and he almost expected it.

"Charles, I tend not to get into these things with you, but what was that all about?" Larry asked once his friend had fully stepped inside the office space.

"Hi, Larry."

"Hello. Now, answer my question, please."

Charlie sat on his desk and looked at Larry, who stood leaning against one of his chalkboards. His friend was studying his every move. Charlie hated how he seemed to be forever under the microscope of all his friends and family members.

"I was having lunch with a woman."

Larry's stern face suddenly turned into one of confusion. "Are... aren't you and Amita dating?"

"Yes. It was an older woman."

"Charles?"

Charlie laughed at Larry's face. "It wasn't anything romantic. She's the mother of one of my students."

"And?"

"And she had some questions for me. I didn't exactly trust the woman, so I had you call in the middle of it, in case things were going south. As you can see since I'm here now, that's where it was headed."

"You had me worried for a minute. I couldn't understand how you could possibly be going out with someone else when Amita is so..."

"So?" Charlie grinned as his friends faced turned red from blushing.

"Stop it, Charles! You know what I mean. You two are so compatible."

"I'm just teasing you, Larry," Charlie said as he patted Larry's shoulder.

"Shouldn't you be on your way home now?"

"I will in a second." Charlie gathered his papers and stuffed them into his bag before heading out.

"See you tomorrow, Charles."

"See you, Larry!" Charlie called as he ran down the hall.

Charlie wasn't running because he was in a hurry. It was because he couldn't wait to be alone. He wanted to give himself a moment to think, to process what happened with Janet. Sure, he had had the ride home, but that was it. He couldn't think yet. He had still been in shock. What woman didn't care that her one of her sons killed his brother? Charlie couldn't imagine what his mother would think if something like that happened, but he knew she wouldn't be calm and indifferent about it.

Though he wanted to think, Charlie also missed his brother. He decided he could drive to his brother's office. It was a long enough drive that he would have time to think.

Along the way, Charlie stopped to buy another notebook. He kept literally hundreds at a time. He probably didn't need one, but the idea of filling blank pages with his ideas and math thrilled him. He walked into the convenient store and went to the office supply aisle. He found the regular 200 page notebook and picked it up. He was about to casually walk out of the aisle when he was stopped by someone blocking the end of the aisle.

"Hey, Eppes."

Charlie screamed and ran the other way. Maybe he was hallucinating. Yes, that had to be it. Why else would Jake come to a public place and risk getting caught? Charlie felt more fear when he realized that he didn't have an agent on him during the day. So if this was real, he'd have to fight it alone.

People stared as Charlie ran through the store. He didn't bother to turn around to see if Jake was following. He just needed out of there and fast. Passing by the cash registers, Charlie flew out of the automatic doors and out to his car.

He shakily got his hands into his pocket to retrieve the keys to his car. He searched the key chain for the right key and looked out across the parking lot, only to see Jake coming toward him, almost too calmly.

"Damn it," Charlie cried in a high voice. He couldn't get the key right. There weren't that many on there, but his mind wasn't focused. He got to the right one and found that his car wouldn't start up anyway.

What were the odds that the parking lot would be vacant of people? Charlie couldn't think to come up with a number at the moment, but he saw Jake coming toward him and knew he was in for it.

"Please, be a dream. Please, be a dream," Charlie prayed. He wanted to close his eyes, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He should run, get away, but it was too late for that. Jake would only catch him.

So he kept his doors locked tight and watched as Jake slowly moved toward him. He suddenly bent over and pulled out a bat that Charlie hadn't realized was there. It was obvious that Jake had tampered with his car, and left the bat there, too. Charlie was completely trapped. He couldn't even think about leaving.

Jake appeared again in front of the car. He climbed onto the front of the car and took a good swing at the windshield. Charlie screamed as glass shattered in around him. He covered his face, but the glass still cut his forehead and then his hands. Making sure he got ever last piece of glass, Jake swung again and again, leaving Charlie exposed.

Jake got down from the car and beat in the driver's side window. Charlie cried out and dove toward the other direction. The back windows came out and Charlie moved to the front seat. He should run, try to get away while Jake was on the other side. But if he did and Jake caught him, what would happen?

The back windows went out and Jake came to his side before Charlie could react. Glass landed in his hair, cut his face, his hands, and his neck. When all the glass was gone, Jake was finished.

"Hope you liked that, Chucky." Jake walked up to the window closest to Charlie and unlocked the door. Charlie kicked at him, trying to keep him from touching it, but Jake threw the door open and reached in with the bat. Charlie was able to dodge the blows from the bat in the beginning, but once Jake hit once, it was too late. The breath was knocked out of Charlie with a harsh hit to the stomach. Jake hit his arms, his ribs, his chest, his groin, and his legs with stunning strikes. Charlie was left bruised and bleeding in his car. He had no idea how no one was able to come out in time to see Jake's attack. Jake left without any witnesses and got away free... again.

Hissing in pain as he reached his bloody hand into his pocket, Charlie got out his cellphone and brought it to his ear after dialing his brother's number.

"Eppes," Don answered casually.

"Donny..."

"Charlie? What's wrong?"

"He's back."

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Those two words were enough to make Don's blood run cold. He was in the middle of getting ready to confront a local gang about a murder. They knew which one was the killer, but it was obvious they wouldn't get him without some conflict. The murderer was the younger brother of the gang's leader. Don was getting his vest on when Charlie called.

"Are you hurt? Where are you, Buddy?"

Charlie took a shallow breath before answering his brother. "I don't know how bad it is. It hurts, though, Don. I don't think it's too serious."

Don's heart raced. "Did he hurt you? Charlie, what happened?" Don motioned with his hands to get a team by him. David noticed and came over. Don turned to his car and took out a piece of paper and wrote what he needed on it.

"I... I stopped at the store for a notebook, and he was inside. I ran out to my car, but he must have tampered with it. It wouldn't start. He... he came at me. He had a baseball bat and he knocked the glass out of my windows. Then he hit me with the bat."

Don held the phone away from his mouth a minute. "Damn it." He turned to David. "Call a team in. They need to check this out. And call in an ambulance."

"Where are you, Buddy?"

"I... I'm at the Office Supply store near your office."

Don paused to tell that to David, who already had his cellphone out to call in a team and an ambulance.

"Buddy, I can't make it down there right now. We're in the middle of bringing someone in, okay? If you're still there, I'll be at the hospital. David is calling in an ambulance right, now. You gonna be okay?"

Charlie's heart fell when he realized his brother wasn't going to be there. He was scared. He wanted family. He didn't want some strangers. But he would have to live with that.

"Okay, Don."

"All right. You take care and sit tight, okay? I'll have someone call Dad, too, so he should be there. I'm sorry, Buddy."

"It's okay."

"Okay. I'll see you soon, Buddy. Bye."

"Bye."

Damn. Don felt awful about not going to his brother, but he was needed where he was. He had to catch this guy and his team would need every one they could get. It was going to be a dangerous situation, and that's what he lived for.

Megan walked over, fully geared and ready to go. "Hey, what was that all about?"

"Jake just attacked Charlie."

Don could see the fire in her eyes as he mentioned that. His whole team was affected by this case. They all were determined to catch him, and the fact that they hadn't just pushed them harder. "Is he all right?"

"I hope so. He didn't sound too bad."

"You should go to him."

"No. I'm needed here. I'll see him in a couple hours, tops."

Megan nodded, though he knew she wanted him to go to Charlie. He could if he really wanted to, but he couldn't face his brother. Not right now.

How could he have let Charlie down again? It was as though he had to follow his brother around 24/7 to protect him. And whenever he wasn't there, that was when Charlie got hurt. How could he let this happen? He should have caught Jake weeks ago. He hadn't so much as had a glimpse of him. There had to be some way to catch him.

Charlie was hurt, again. It was his fault. A good brother - and agent - would have caught Jake a long time ago. A good brother would have fought Jake off before Charlie would get hurt. A good brother would have been there the first time Charlie was attacked and would have ended it all then. But, no, Don was not a good brother. He had failed to protect his brother yet again. What good was he, anyway?

At the academy, they always told them never to go into a dangerous situation with the wrong mindset. They told them to feel good about yourself and feel confident. They told you to think about what you had to do and how you were going to do it. And usually, Special Agent Don Eppes did just that. But not this time.

Shots were being fired from both ends. The FBI team was doing well. They were getting good shots in, ones that didn't kill, but injured enough to detain them. However, Don Eppes moved out of his shielded position. He suddenly felt confident that he could get a clean shot of the gang's leader. They didn't need him right away. They could get him. But that's not what Don had on his mind.

All he could think about was the fact that he had let his brother down again. If he was only going to keep letting Charlie down, what did he have to lose? So he forgot about what his family would think. He forgot about those who depended on him. He forgot how he should never do something like it. He forgot himself.

Don stepped out into the line of fire and took aim at a man they didn't even need. He ignored the sounds of his fellow agents telling him to get down, to come back.

Seizing the perfect opportunity, one of the gang members shot at him. They hit dead on, not hitting his vest or any protection. It hit his right shoulder, a small portion uncovered by protective gear. Don hit the ground by the impact and Colby moved out of his position, covered by his fellow agents. He was able to drag Don back behind a brick wall, so he would be safe there. Colby continued firing, though he stole a few glances at his injured team leader. He ducked down beside his boss and called in on the radio for an ambulance.

Amid the pain and the sounds of shots being fired, all Don could think was that it wouldn't make any difference, him getting shot. Maybe he'd die. It wouldn't make any difference, except maybe Charlie wouldn't get hurt any more. Maybe that was what it took to keep Charlie safe. If that was true, Don was happy he was able to at least contribute that. Because right now, he didn't really think anyone would care that he died. He was no good to his family, his agents, his friends. He was worthless.

Maybe he deserved to die.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alan had rushed to the hospital. He couldn't believe Charlie was hurt again. His son still had his cast on even. It was too much. Charlie needed someone to be with him, so he broke a few laws to get to his son.

And thankfully wasn't caught.

Charlie was being examined when Alan got there, and luckily, Alan was allowed to go back with him. Charlie clutched his father's hand tightly as the doctor looked over his bruised and bloody body. Alan tried to keep from looking at the dark purple bruises, but they were like a car wreck. It was awful, and you didn't want to look, but you couldn't quite bring yourself to look away.

The doctor told them that he had no extensive injuries. Jake had known how hard he was hitting, apparently, because nothing was broken and Charlie had no internal bleeding. He would just need some pain killers and ice packs for the bruising and a few bandages for the cuts from the glass. They were mostly superficial, though painful.

Alan was taking Charlie to get signed out when there was a sudden commotion. Charlie was sitting in the wheelchair he was to be taken out in and couldn't quite see what was going on. Alan turned and saw a few EMTs pushing a gurney inside and he couldn't help but notice the bright yellow letters on the FBI agents running alongside it.

"Dad?"

Alan couldn't respond to his son. Immediately he recognized Megan, David, and Colby. Knowing that when those three were together, Don would be too, he counted the FBI vests. There were only three. Alan prayed Don wasn't the one on the gurney.

But then Megan looked up and everything moved in slow motion. She looked at Alan as she kept running to keep up with the gurney and the look in her eyes told him everything.

And Alan knew it wasn't good.

**So sorry it took so long to update. School is getting busy and I've had lots to do and not much time on the computer. I hope this chapter was worth the wait. I thought it was pretty good, if I do say so myself. Anyone notice how I used a bat again? I just played baseball today, so I had it on my mind. LOL I hope to be able to update quickly since this was an exciting and cliffhanger chapter. I hope it won't be longer than a week this time!**

**FraidyCat, if you're out there reading, you know I'm going to be hitting you up for some medical help! Be expecting a message from me!**


	15. I'm Not Sorry, Though

Lucky for Charlie, the police had arrived soon after he had called Don. He hadn't expected them to move so quickly, but apparently someone inside the store had called. Seeing the shards of glass by the car and the moaning person inside, the police had come to Charlie's aide quickly. While waiting on the ambulance to arrive, they took Charlie's statement. The police knew about Jake; by then every all stations knew. There wasn't much more they could do about it once the FBI's team came. It was their investigation.

Charlie realized how lucky he had been in the past to have family with him when he was hurt. He had been alone after Jake's first attack, but he had been unconscious for most of it. And now he knew how much he wanted to have his family close to him. Alan was waiting on him, and Don would be there later. He had known that, but having strangers staring down at you like you were a part of an exhibit was not his idea of fun.

Charlie hadn't been at the hospital long. He had allowed the doctors to let his father come back with him. He wanted his dad; he didn't care how old he was. His face stung from the cuts, and when he first caught sight of himself in the reflection of a window, he had been disturbed by the amount of blood smeared on his face. They were all superficial, though. He hadn't even needed stitches.

Now he wondered how many stitches it would take to sew his heart back together.

Don was hurt. He was in the hospital. He had been shot. What was happening to him?

Alan had tried to block his view of the familiar FBI agents, but he hadn't succeeded. Charlie stood from his wheelchair, painfully, and he could see the last of Megan's face as she followed the gurney around a corner. And Don was the one on there. He knew it as well as he knew his name, without being told.

Charlie's own pains were forgotten. He ignored his father, who was trying to get him to sit down again. Instead, he went to meet the agents who were left unharmed.

However, Alan caught up with his son. He took him by the arm and turned Charlie toward him. "They'll be here in a second. They need a minute, too."

Charlie looked blindly at his father. Sure, they deserved their time. But he deserved answers. Still, he let his father take him back to the seats.

Megan, Colby, and David all stood outside the swinging doors. It was as far as they were allowed to go. Seeing the last of their lead agent leave, they turned to one another in solemn silence. None of them wanted to move without the other. Megan reached for Colby's hand, and then David. They fell in line and walked hand-in-hand to the waiting room until they reached Alan and Charlie. Megan released David and Colby's hands, though at the look on Charlie's face, she wanted something to hold onto again.

"Don was shot," Megan started, deciding she would be the one to tell them. "He went down during the cross-fire. Colby pulled him to safety but... we found out he was shot twice. There was a bullet in his vest, and one hit the outside of his shoulder. He... he lost a lot of blood. We're not sure how bad it is. I'm so sorry."

The three agents sat around the Eppes family. They all wanted to be there. They couldn't leave. They cared too much about Don, and about his family. Slowly, Charlie had been accepted as one of them. And as the saying went, never leave a man behind.

Charlie's thoughts raced. He reached out a hand to his father, and, without looking at his hand, Alan grasped it within his own. He continued to stare ahead, down the hallway Don had been taken. He knew there was a possibility of losing his son. Would this be the day it ended? He wasn't just shot once. He was shot twice! How many people survived that?

"Look, Mr. Eppes, he's going to be fine. Don has been through stuff like this before. He'll make it through," David said.

"Yeah, he's too stubborn to die."

At that word, everyone looked at Colby. He had said the "d" word, the one that was on everyone's mind. No one would voice it, though. Colby mentally kicked himself.

Megan, on the other side of Alan, couldn't be seen by anyone but Colby. She shook his head at him and made a cutting motion across her neck. She couldn't believe he had said it. That was the last thing they needed!

"Don will be okay. I've never known a better agent than Don. He'll be fine," Megan put in, trying to fix what Colby said.

Alan finally took his eyes of Colby. He didn't blame the agent, wasn't mad at him. But he had voiced his concern. That Don would die. He couldn't handle that. Ever.

"You kids can go. You don't have to stay around here."

"But we want to, Mr. Eppes."

"My name is Alan."

Megan smiled. "Alan."

So they stayed. Charlie remained by his brother's side. The agents went back and forth between pacing the waiting room floor and asking if there was any news about Don. Alan found it eerie how familiar this scene felt to him, so he was beyond pacing a hole in the floor. He knew all he could do was wait, and that's what he intended to do.

"I'm going to get something to drink," Charlie said as he began to stand. He was halfway up when Alan pulled him back down forcefully.

"No!"

Charlie was pressed against the back of the chair. His heart raced as he looked at his father's face. Colby, David, and Megan were all looking at him now, too, surprised by his sudden outburst.

Alan loosened his grip on Charlie's arm, but kept his hand there. "Stay. Please."

Charlie's heart began to calm and he reached out to his father. He understood that he just wanted to be close to his son. He wouldn't leave him. Not for the world... except maybe for Don.

Charlie moved to the side closest to his father on his chair. Alan wrapped an arm around his son, just to hold him. He had to hang onto what he had... while he still had it.

Colby walked over and stooped by Charlie. "You want me to get you something?"

"Coffee, please."

"Sure thing, Whiz Kid."

"I'll go with you," Megan offered from her place along the other wall, where she had just paced to.

"I'll see if there's any news on Don," David said as he walked to the other side of the room.

Colby went to the cafeteria, though he didn't think the coffee there would be any good. He didn't want to leave the hospital, though. Megan touched his arm lightly as they walked.

"You okay?"

Colby shook his head, his teeth tightly clenched. "I should have been quicker. I should have stopped him from going there. I was closest to him. I could have done something, but I didn't." He stopped in the middle of the hallway and pressed his hand to the wall. Reacting to the anger he felt toward himself, Colby punched the wall.

"Stop!" Megan said, reaching out to stay his hand so he wouldn't try it again. The only way she could tell it hurt him was by his uneasy breathing.

He just stood there, panting, and staring at nothing in particular. Megan reached out and hugged him. After a minute, he reacted and hugged her back.

"You're not allowed to fall apart, you hear me?" she said once they parted. She wiped the moisture from her own eyes as she spoke.

"Who are you talking to? You or me?" Colby said, giving her a small smile.

"Both! We have to be strong for them. Charlie and Alan can't see us break, or they'll think there's something more they should be worried about. They don't need that."

"I know."

"Good. Let's get them that coffee."

They brought back coffee for everyone, and by the time they were back, there was no hint that either one of them had come close to breaking... except for Colby's bruised knuckles.

"Is anyone here for Don Eppes?" a doctor asked as he stepped into the waiting room, with five different pairs of eyes on him.

"We all are, sir," Alan answered for the group.

"You're all family?"

"Yes. These are my children." There was no hesitation in his voice. No one would have known any different... even though the three agents stood out as being unrelated to Alan and Charlie.

"Of course," the doctor smiled.

They were told that the bullet that hit Don's shoulder had only grazed his arm. The wound only needed to be wrapped in a heavy bandage. Also, the bullet that was lodged in his vest hit him near his sternum. He had some extensive bruising on his chest, but no bones were broken. And, what

Alan wanted to hear most, was that he was going to be fine.

With that news, they were able to go back to see him. The three agents decided to come see him some other time. Though they had been extremely worried about Don, they knew that their time was up. It was now time for Alan and Charlie to be with him. They'd get their turn another time.

Alan was finally able to leave his younger son's side, just so he could reach Don. Charlie was left following behind as Alan burst through Don's hospital room. At the sight of his son, he broke into tears.

"Hi, Dad," Don said, resigned. He knew what happened. He knew why it happened, and he was sorry. It was all his fault. He never should have let his thoughts take him away from that. He lost concentration, and it could have cost him his life. Where would Alan and Charlie be then? For that

matter, where was Charlie now? Remembering that his brother was hurt, he wondered if Charlie was hurt badly.

Alan moved to his son's better side and grabbed his son's hand tightly in his. He kissed the palm of it and held it close to his heart. His son was okay. He was alive. How could he have come so close to losing him again? How was he so lucky?

"Where's Charlie?" Don asked, looking at the door.

"He... he was just following me. He'll be here in a second, I'm sure."

Charlie would have been, but he couldn't bring himself to open the door. All it would take was just one push. But he didn't have someone behind him to push him. He needed that shove, that encouragement to go inside. Don needed him, didn't he? He could be strong for his family, right? Then why were his legs turning to jelly?

Taking a deep breath before entering, Charlie pushed through the door. If no one else would give him a push, he'd have to take the lead.

Don turned to look at his brother and frowned when he saw Charlie's face. He had had reason to fear, to worry. He had allowed his brother more pain. He couldn't keep letting these things happen to Charlie! It wasn't right; it wasn't fair. How could Jake slip through their barriers and just attack poor Charlie? He had to look away from Charlie's face. Instead, he concentrated on his father.

So he did have reason to be hesitant? Why did Don look away from him? Was it his fault? Did he do something wrong? Charlie wish he knew what was wrong. Maybe then he could fix it; then his brother would be able to look at him.

"Charlie, come here," Alan said, holding his hand out to his other son. Head held downward, Charlie slowly moved to his father's side. He didn't know that Don was looking at him again, and that there was love and worry on his face. And there was guilt, too.

Alan went from Don's head to Charlie's and kissed them both. He held onto each son and felt so relieved. "I must be the luckiest man on earth. Both my sons were attacked today and yet you're still here. You're still with me. All I ever wanted, all your mother and I ever wanted, was for you two to be safe. I'm sorry that's not the case all the time. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you from her death." Alan's main focus was Charlie when he mentioned his wife's death. Though he knew Don had taken it hard, too, Charlie had dealt with the worst pains and still was haunted by the guilt of not being with her in her final days. "I just... I'm so afraid of losing you now. I lost the woman of my dreams. The only people who I love as much as her are you two. And I'm not about to lose either one of you. Your time is supposed to come years after I'm gone. So, please, be careful. I can't lose you. Please, don't make me."

Alan let go of his sons and walked a few paces away. He hated letting his sons see him cry so much, but his heart was wearing thin. He couldn't take all this in one day without some emotions. He had actually surprised himself by holding out this long. It was just so hard for him! His boys didn't understand. They were always the ones getting hurt. How did they think he felt when he went unharmed every day? Sure, Jake had given him a small bruise on his arm, but that was it. That was nothing compared to what they'd been through. Did they realize that he would take every pain, every injury at once if it meant they never had to? He didn't want them to hurt. He wanted them to be safe. That's what every parent should want for his children. Why was he unable to protect them? Why couldn't he just stand before both of them and scream, "Hit me!" so maybe they'd be spared?

Charlie turned away from Don and walked to his father's side. He slipped his arms around his father's waist and rested his head on Alan's chest. He just wanted to hold his father. How many times had his father wiped away his every tear? How many times had he been held in Alan's arms? He owed his father at least this one moment, to allow his father the chance to be held. It was okay for him to cry. He didn't have to hide it. Charlie knew what that felt like.

Don hated that he was supposed to stay in bed unless someone helped him up. The two people who would help him stood too far away for him to reach. He wanted to join them. He wanted to touch them, tell them it was going to be okay. But who was he to say that? By now he didn't think he could honestly say that. He'd fed them that lie so many times before. He had never been right. Why would this time be any different? If only it would be. Don wanted that more than anything. He wanted his brother to live a happy, secure life. He had promised his mother that he would take care of Charlie and Alan. How could he have let her down?

Alan put his arm around Charlie and pressed his son tightly to him. He held onto his son, his support, and waited for the tears to stop. When they did, he took Charlie by the shoulders and led him back to Don's bed. Don held his arms out to his father, wanting his turn taking care of his father.

Whatever pain Don felt by moving his arms around his father didn't matter. He just wanted to hold his father. At least he could give him that comfort. He may not be able to take care of Charlie for him, but he would sure as hell try.

"Let's get you boys home, okay?" Alan said. Since Don was allowed to leave as long as he went home with Alan, the Eppes men made their way back home. Don sat in the front seat beside his brother, and Charlie was thankful. It gave him the chance to look at his brother, study his face. Halfway home, Don caught his brother's gaze in the passenger side window. He smiled warmly at his brother, but Charlie saw the lie in it. Don was not in a smiling mood. Something was wrong. Something else had happened that day. Don wasn't just shot. He had been affected some other way. Charlie intended to find out what it was.

Alan led Don inside to the couch, where Don had chosen to stay for the time being. Charlie's own injuries were forgotten as he helped take care of his older brother. Whatever he could do to make him better, he would do. Maybe in return, Don would tell him what in the world was going on.

Charlie took a good look in the mirror while his father set Don up in the living room. The cuts weren't really all that bad. The bruises weren't that colorful. Maybe it would be okay. He was fine, right? It was nothing compared to what Don went through. So his pain could be overlooked. His pain looked like that of a child's scraped knee next to Don's. His brother had been shot twice.

Every time that thought entered Charlie's head his heart skipped a beat. He could hardly believe his brother had been shot not just once but twice. This had never happened before. And as he told his brother before, it made it seem like they were going to be that much closer to losing him. What could come after Don getting shot twice? Getting bombed?

Charlie shivered. He couldn't let his mind drift there. Don was alive. He was okay, for the most part. Something obviously wasn't right from what Charlie could tell. There was something different in the way his brother looked. He wasn't sure what to make of it yet. He was hoping his brother would be willing to tell him. Don didn't owe him any explanations, but Charlie still wanted them. He had a nagging feeling that whatever it was wasn't good. Don always had that certain look about him whenever something was wrong. Maybe Charlie was the only one who saw it, since Alan hadn't said anything before. In a way, he hoped his father didn't notice. He didn't want to put more on Alan than he already had.

Charlie shook his head in disgust at himself. He had allowed his father to take so much on himself. He hadn't considered the fact that Alan would be dealing with the fact that he was perfectly all right physically and his sons weren't. Charlie could imagine that he would be in the same emotional state if he had to watch his loved ones get hurt.

_"I'll make you watch them die."_

Charlie jerked at Carl's voice. He hadn't heard it in a while. Lately Jake's had taken over. What would he have gone through if Carl had done all the things he had planned? How would he have been able to stand it? How did any of the victims stand it?

It was then that Charlie realized that it was a good thing that Carl had let those victims die. He couldn't imagine how any of them would be able to survive something like that. He knew he wouldn't be able to.

"Charlie? You okay?" Alan asked in the open doorway of the bathroom.

"Yeah, Dad. I'm fine." Charlie met his father's eyes in the reflection of the mirror. He then turned away from it and faced Alan. "Is Don set up?"

"Yes. He wants to see you."

"Okay."

Charlie moved past his father and to the door. He turned when he realized his father wasn't following. "You coming?"

Alan blinked, stepping out of his daze. "No, uh... I need to go have a talk with your mother."

Charlie nodded in understanding. He had had to have a few talks with her before, too.

While Alan slipped away into his room, Charlie went downstairs to see his brother. Don was staring blankly at something near the window. Since his eyes never quite focused, Charlie wasn't sure what it was that captured his attention. Don looked up, though, when Charlie moved into the living room.

"Hey, Buddy," Don said. Even the word "Buddy" didn't seem to have the same effect when Don said it. Something was wrong. Charlie used his gaze to plead his brother to tell him so he could fix it.

"Hey," Charlie replied softly. He sat in the chair across from his brother's, giving him a plain view of him. "Did you need something?"

Don got the far-away look in his eyes again and shook his head slowly. "No, I just wanted your company." _Because when I'm with you, you don't get hurt, _Don silently added.

"Are you okay?" Charlie asked after Don remained silent for a few minutes.

"I'm okay, Charlie." It sounded so fake. Who would believe that?

"No, you're not," Charlie whispered quietly as he leaned toward his brother.

Don turned his attention back to his little brother. "Why do you say that?" Could his brother really see what was going through his head? How he couldn't deal with Charlie getting hurt anymore? He was so close to the edge. Did Charlie see how high up he was?

"Look, Don, you're not exactly an open book. But I've been around you enough times to see when something isn't right. You get that look you're wearing right now. I don't like it Don because it has to be really bad if you're upset. You don't let your feelings show unless something is really wrong. Maybe other people don't notice, but I do. Please, Don, let me help you. I'll do anything, just tell me what it is. Please."

Charlie stretched his hand across the space between him and his brother and rested it on his brother's hand in a comforting gesture. Don stared at the hand as questions for his brother flew through his mind.

Can you keep yourself safe? Can you stop Jake? Can you stop getting hurt? Can you tell me why I messed up? Can you tell me why I'm so incapable of protecting you? Can you tell me why you deserve this? Can you make this all go away? Sure, Charlie, if you can do any of those things, that would be nice.

But Charlie couldn't do those things. Don wished someone had a solution for him. He was getting tired of not knowing what to do.

So he told his brother nothing.

**Okay, kind of a cliffhanger again. It just means more angst to come. You were already expecting that, though, weren't you?**

**I apologize for the delay and the shortness of the last chapter. I swear I didn't realize it was that short. It looked a lot longer in the document I wrote it in. I hope this chapter makes up for it.**

**How many of you vote I write the angsty one-shot about when Don and Charlie fought over Val (the woman who got married at the Eppes house in season 2) that's been weighing on my mind and how many of you vote that I just write the next chapter? Lemme know!**

**Snaps for FraidyCat for the help with the medical terminology and all the things I'm not so good at. It wasn't that bad was it, Maureen:-D**


	16. Your Plan Was to Kill Me

Charlie knew something was wrong. Don wasn't telling him anything. His brother wasn't the most open person in the world, but usually he would tell him something. His silence spoke only that whatever happened was bad, at Charlie wasn't sure if he was prepared to find out about it.

"Come on, Don. Talk to me. Whatever it is, we'll deal with it. You can't do it alone."

Don truly wished he could tell his brother. But considering it was about him, he knew he couldn't. There was no way he could tell his brother that he'd been thinking of Charlie

when he got shot. Hell, he was still thinking about Charlie. He had never felt so inadequate in all his life. What had he done wrong? Where had all his training and experience gone? Don couldn't tell Charlie about what happened. Surely Charlie would blame himself for it if he did. Don couldn't have that. He wouldn't allow it. So even if it meant Charlie would get mad at him, Don couldn't tell him the truth.

"Have you not been listening to me these past few weeks? I've only opened up to you in the most important ways, Don. You know I worry about you, but that's okay. It's expected of a family. We worry, we fight, we're there for each other. That's how families function. We get through things, no matter how bad it is. The only reason you'd have a reason to get through this alone is if you weren't a part of a family. Don, Dad and I are here... Just, talk to us. Please."

Charlie tried to beg his brother with his eyes. There had to be something he could do. He wasn't good at sitting back and watching someone fight alone when he knew he could help. Something about the way that Don looked let him know that even Don knew that he could help. So why wouldn't he let him?

"Please, Don. Say something!" Charlie screamed.

Don just stared away from his brother. He couldn't make eye contact. He couldn't say a word for fear that he would let something slip. He couldn't have that. Never.

"Fine!" Charlie said and left his wounded brother alone in the living room. It seemed obvious that Don didn't want his help. Where had their progress gone? Charlie had set his past on the table. He let his brother in, showing him how he had dealt with his brother's injuries. Would that affect today, now that Don was hurt once more? Was it because Charlie had said something that Don wouldn't talk to him?

Charlie had no idea why Don had to be this way. He just wanted to help. It couldn't be that bad, and if it was, they'd get through it. That's the way their family worked. Don didn't seem to notice that anymore.

Charlie went into his room and laid down on the bed. He suddenly felt exhausted. He was frustrated from trying to get Don to open up, tired from being out so long, and suddenly, he felt the fear come back. He had seen Jake today. He could have easily been killed. But he wasn't. So what more could happen? Charlie didn't know what it would be like.

As Charlie closed his eyes to try to find some rest, he felt like he was watching a 3-D movie. Jake seemed to jump at him from behind his closed lids and the bat was swinging at him once more. This couldn't be happening. Eyes still closed, Charlie gripped the sheets around him, the ones he lay on top of instead of underneath. The glass scattered around his head and he couldn't bring himself to shield his body. There was a sudden bang and the windows were all gone. He felt himself go lower and wondered when Jake would pounce, having the upper hand.

Then something unexpected happened. A hand reached out, touched him. Charlie jerked, finally bringing himself to shield his body from the attacks. He couldn't let Jake touch him. He'd be killed for sure if he did. Charlie's stomach clenched when the hand came back at him, grabbing his shoulder. Charlie struggled, fought, hit at it, as the sweat from fear began to pour down his face. He was trapped, cornered. His car was no safe haven. Don would have protected him. The bat fell onto his shoulder where the hand had touched and Charlie cried out.

"Charlie!"

Oh, God, he said his name. Charlie hated it when they said his name. It made it feel dirty, wrong. He prayed they'd never call him "buddy" or Don's nickname for him would be forever ruined. It would never hold the same meaning. Was Jake going to throw him? The hand returned, encircling his upper arm. There were bruises there, so he pushed it off.

"Charlie!" Don's scream managed to break through his brother's nightmare and Charlie jumped up. He gave a small cry and held a hand over his bruised ribs at the pain he caused when he jumped up.

Don had watched his brother sweat and fight for too long. Charlie wasn't responding when he touched him. He wasn't waking up, only fighting him away. Don hated making him upset, but he had to touch him to try to get him to wake up.

He was relieved when Charlie finally woke up.

"Buddy, are you okay?"

Charlie still wasn't aware of his surroundings. Don had been talking to him? He hadn't realized he managed to fall asleep. It was dark outside and there was only the faint light from the desk lamp in his room. He slowly blinked and took in his new surroundings and found they were much better than where he had been.

"Buddy?"

"How'd you get up here?" Charlie asked, realizing that Don couldn't have managed the stairs by himself.

"Dad helped me. I heard you having a nightmare or something, so I convinced him to let me come in here alone for a minute. You're supposed to come get him when I'm ready to go to my bed."

"Okay."

"You avoided my question. Are you okay?"

Charlie swallowed hard and thought for a minute. Was he okay? He doubted it.

"Yeah, I guess so. Look, Don, about earlier, I know you may not want help, but-"

"Let's not talk about that yet. I want to talk about you first."

Charlie blinked at his brother. What about him?

"What happened today?" Don asked as he settled himself comfortably in Charlie's bed.

It was easy to picture the images, since they'd just been shown in his dreams. "I, uh, I was stopping at the store to get a notebook. When I went inside, I got the notebook, but Jake came into the aisle I was in. I dropped the notebook and just ran. I got in my car, but it wouldn't start. I guess Jake messed with it or something. Anyway, he came out. I locked the doors because there was no where for me to go. I hunkered down in the back seat... and just waited."

Even Don shivered at the thought. He could remember his brother having trouble with hide-and-seek. Charlie had explained to him that he loved the game when he got to seek, but when he had to hide, it scared him not knowing when someone would find you. He hated being alone, waiting someplace dark, not knowing when to expect someone to jump out and say, "I found you."

"He bashed in the windows until I wasn't protected any longer. Then he hit me with the bat he used to shatter the glass. When he finally left, I called you."

Don knew there had to be more to the story than the simplistic version Charlie was telling him. What had Charlie been feeling? How did it feel to have Jake chasing him?

"I'm so sorry, Buddy."

Charlie nodded solemnly. "It's okay, Don."

"No, it's not." Don shook his head, clenching his teeth. "It's not okay because you keep getting hurt. When does it end, Charlie? When you're dead? 'Cause that's the ending I'm seeing. Jake's beating us ten to nothing. We can't catch a break. We haven't even scored against this guy. Do you realize that? You have to get out of here, Charlie. I don't know where you can go, but you have to be safe some place else. I can't let you keep getting hurt. I'll find someone who can protect you-"

"What do you mean 'who can protect me?' Don, you haven't done anything wrong in protecting me-"

"Open your eyes!" Don screamed in Charlie's ear. "You got hit with a baseball bat today, Charlie! I wasn't there. Your house has been vandalized. I wasn't there. Carl tried to kill you and kidnapped you. I wasn't there to save you. So what? What good have I done in protecting you? Tell me, Charlie, because I sure as hell don't know."

Charlie paused. He could never blame his brother for not protecting him. No matter how many times Don hadn't been there when the danger was, Don had made up for it by being there afterward. He felt safe with his brother. That never changed.

"You wouldn't understand."

"You know why? Because I'm not doing a damn thing to protect you."

"Don, listen to me. You're always there for me when I need you. I don't expect you to know every time I get hurt. I'll deal with that at the time. But you help me when I can't help myself. After it happens, I'm scared and you're there to make me feel safe again. That's what I really need. Don, you can't tell yourself you're not doing a good job of protecting me. I'm still alive, right?"

Don chuckled sarcastically as he turned away from his brother. "Yeah and I've been such a help to it. If I had been paying attention to you in the first place, Carl wouldn't have ever come near you. I never should have brought you that day. Too bad I had to think of that when I was out on the field today."

A sudden hush fell across the room. Don forced himself to turn his head to look at Charlie. He was staring at him, wondering what his brother had meant.

"You were thinking about me today? When you were out in the field?"

"No, Buddy, that... that was just a slip of the tongue. I didn't mean that."

Charlie's heart stopped beating as he came to a realization about Don's injuries. "You were thinking about me, weren't you, when you got shot?"

Don's eyes told the truth. His mouth told the lie. "No, Buddy. That was... that was before."

Charlie nodded in understanding. He stood from the bed and Don tried to reach out to stop him. He wasn't able to.

Charlie left his brother in his bed and went to get Alan.

When his father turned to look at him, he took in his son's appearance with a worried gaze.

"What happened?" Alan asked Charlie.

"Nothing, Dad. Don is ready to go to his bed."

"Oh. Okay. Do you want to help?"

"No, there... there's something I have to do out in the garage. 'Night, Dad."

"Good night, Charlie."

Charlie mechanically made his way to the garage... his safe haven.

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Alan slowly walked into Charlie's room to get Don. "What was that all about?"

Knowing he couldn't tell his father, Don replied, "Nothing. I think he's just tired."

Alan eyed his son a moment before coming over to help him up. When it came to his boys, it was never nothing. He knew that well enough. He hoped it was nothing serious. After his father settled him in bed, Don couldn't help but think about what he'd done earlier that day. He had given up. How could he have done that? If he had really taken the time to think about his actions, he never would have made that move and he never would have gotten shot. It was so out of character for him, but he was to the point where he felt he was completely useless. And if he was useless, what was the point in him living?

He truly wished he had never said anything to Charlie. His brother had done a lot for him and had opened up to him more than he ever had before. He should have respected that and responded in some other way. But he wasn't even sure what he could tell Charlie. He wouldn't have known what to say in response to his brother's comments. He couldn't have told him that he had gotten shot because he had given up. He couldn't tell Charlie that since he was worried about him he had stopped thinking clearly and that's why he allowed himself to get shot. That wouldn't be right. His brother didn't need to know that. It was personal. He would deal with it.

As Don rolled over on the bed, aching all over, he hoped his brother could disregard the comment that he had been thinking about him... though he didn't honestly expect that to happen.

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Charlie moved slowly in the garage. His mind wasn't processing information at its normal speed. He walked to one of the chalkboards he had covered up. Most of the information on it had been stored in a notebook he had already gotten out. He figured what was on the board would help, too. Little did his family know, Charlie had worked on bullet trajectories, velocity of bullets and other information about bullets the first time Don got shot. He had worked on P vs NP before, but working directly on bullets, the things that could kill Don, made him feel more in control. He knew what to suspect when he worked on that. Sometimes that scared him, but he wanted to be prepared for the worst.

This time, Charlie worked on Don's situation and the bullet trajectories of him getting shot twice. Something was missing, no matter how he worked it. He worked with the formula KEWV2/2g, which determines the amount of tissue damage from a gun shot wound by the amount of kinetic energy lost by the projectile in the body. Whatever way he worked it, something wasn't accounted for. Meaning it was probably him.

Knowing he would probably regret it, Charlie put in distraction as a factor, and it fit Don's situation.

"Oh, God," Charlie said as he backed away from the board. It was his fault. Don got shot because of him. Don never would have gotten shot. He's not that careless. But he had Charlie on the mind. He wasn't thinking about his job. He was worried about him. It was all his fault.

As if in a desperate plea for understanding, Charlie used his finger to erase certain variables on the board until his message was scattered across the board. It seemed completely obvious to him, since those letters didn't fit with the math he was working on. But maybe they could see it still. Maybe they'd understand why he had to leave.

Charlie only took his book bag that he brought with him to school and filled it with a notebook, a water bottle, and the notebook filled with his work on bullets. He didn't leave any message, other than the one on the board. Knowing his family was already in bed by now, he was able to quietly slip out the garage door. He walked, not sure where he was going. He just knew he had to get away. He couldn't risk putting his family in danger anymore. If he was taken out of the equation, Don would never have been shot. His brother could have died because of him. Charlie couldn't live with himself if that ever happened. So all he had to do was remove himself from his family's life. Then they wouldn't get hurt.

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Alan was up early the next morning fixing french toast for his sons. He kept his ears open, in case Don called for him. He knew his son would need help moving around, so he wanted to be ready for him. Charlie's door was closed, so he assumed he was still asleep. He'd have classes soon, so if he wasn't up, Alan would go get his sons.

Don was up before Charlie, so Alan went upstairs and peaked in Charlie's room before getting Don. He was surprised to find Charlie's bed empty.

"Charlie?" Alan called. He stepped in the room and looked in Charlie's bathroom. The door was open and no one was inside.

"Dad!" Don's voice carried to Charlie's room.

Alan decided to go to Don. He'd worry about Charlie later.

"Hey, Donny," Alan said as he walked in his oldest son's room. Don's hair was ruffled from sleep, but he looked better today than he had yesterday. Alan always thought his sons looked better when he came close to losing one of them. He shook his head. He couldn't think about that. Don needed up.

Alan led his son to the kitchen table. Don moved easier on his own, but his ribs ached with the movement. He had to move slowly or he'd have to breathe harder, putting more pressure on his bruised ribs.

"Where's Charlie?" Don asked once he was sitting in a chair at the table.

"I'm not sure. He wasn't in his room this morning. Maybe he left for work early."

"Maybe." Don's heart ached for his brother. He wished he hadn't said anything to him. That had been his plan, but it didn't work out the way he wanted to. He hoped that wasn't the reason for Charlie's absence.

"I'll go check the garage," Alan said after he served Don his french toast.

He walked out into the garage and found several boards full of Charlie's writing. Having just been in there last night, Alan realized his son had to have been up all night if he had filled that many. The boards had been blank the night before.

"What's wrong, Charlie?" Alan asked the empty garage before heading back to the kitchen.

Don looked up when his father walked back in. He came in alone, disheartening Don. He was hoping to see his little brother, so he could talk to him.

"No luck?"

Alan shook his head. "I'll try his cell."

He grabbed the phone and dialed Charlie's cell phone. Don jumped when he heard it ring behind him. Alan looked to the desk and saw the cell phone, and he hung up.

"That's weird that he didn't take his cell phone."

Don nodded in agreement. If he wasn't even giving his family a way to contact him, he must have been more affected that Don that. He hoped his brother would come home after work, if that's where he really was.

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Charlie had been walking for eight hours. It was four o'clock in the morning and he honestly didn't care where he was. He didn't pay any attention to signs, just let his feet take him where ever they wanted to. He would stop only to take a drink of water, then keep going. On a normal day, his injuries would prove painful. Today, though, he couldn't feel the pain as his thoughts took over every thought and every movement. There was no time to think about any injury, except for the injuries he caused his older brother to have.

He never would have guessed he would be a dangerous factor in Don's life. Sure, his brother had taken on bullies for him and had stood up for him in more ways than one. But this was different. This wasn't some kid on the playground who had been mean to him. This wasn't even for his own good. Charlie had called his brother before Don went into a dangerous situation, and because of it, Don had been thinking about him. He had been thinking about him so he wasn't focused on his job. You had to pay attention at all times, or you could get shot. Don knew that. But he had been worried about Charlie, and his mind moved elsewhere. Charlie had nearly cost him his life. Why couldn't he have just called the police? He should have done that. He never should have put that on Don. It hadn't been that bad of an injury. It wasn't like he was going to die. Jake hadn't even been around anymore. He was safe. He could have waited. Alan could have told him. Something. He just shouldn't have caused his brother to worry about him even more than he already did.

Charlie was near the end of his rope as he walked on. His strength was waning, whether he felt it or not. Janet could see it. Jake had pointed him out to her, telling her that he wanted her to talk to him. She could hardly believe she was helping him, but Justin's life was at stake. She should have known keeping in contact with Jake had been the wrong decision. But he was her son's best friend. She couldn't just forget that. Jake and Carl had spent so much time together. Maybe Jake could help keep a part of her son with her.

She pulled up along Charlie as he walked. She had no idea what had happened to him. She knew about Jake, but there had been something else. Something had changed him. He looked so resigned. Janet truly felt sorry for him. Maybe he would forgive her, if he knew what else she was doing.

"Charlie!" she called when she rolled down the passenger window. He didn't hear her until the third time she called his name. He turned, and the sadness in his eyes shocked her.

"Do you need a ride?"

Charlie looked to the right and to the left. Without a word, he got in the car.

"You look awful. Let me take you to my house. I'll get you back on your feet in no time. And, if it's okay with you, I'll finish telling you Carl's story."

Charlie nodded. Was he out of his mind? Could he honestly trust this woman to take care of him? He wasn't sure, but he couldn't go home. Not now. Maybe not ever.

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"I'll get it," Alan said, though he wasn't sure why. Don wasn't supposed to be up on his own, and they were the only ones home. So he wasn't sure why he said he'd get the door.

"Larry! How good to see you."

Larry gave a small smile as he stepped into the Eppes home. "I was wondering where Charles was. He didn't come to school today, and I was worried about him because he didn't let anyone know he wasn't coming in."

"What?" Alan's face paled. Larry feared the worst.

"You don't know where he is either." It wasn't a question. It was a statement. Larry could see it was true.

"Don!" Alan said as he walked to the living room where Don was sitting on the couch watching TV. Don wanted to stand when he saw his father's white face.

"What is it, Dad?" he asked.

"Charlie didn't go to work today. He's not here and he's not at work. Where else could he be?"

Larry gently pushed Alan's shoulders so that he would sit down. Once pressed, Alan sank into the chair and felt his hands shaking. Where was his son? Why had he not thought to call the school to check on him? Where could he have gone?

Don's stomach lurched. He took a few deep breaths to calm himself, then looked at Larry.

"Would you get me the phone, please?"

Larry nodded and moved to get the phone. He handed it to Don and he dialed the FBI offices.

"Reeves," Megan answered.

"Megan, have you seen Charlie today?"

"Don? No, I haven't seen him. Why?"

"Damn it."

"Don, what's going on?" Megan asked forcefully.

"Charlie is missing."

"I'm on it."

"Don't bother trying to find him with his cell phone. He doesn't have it."

"How about his laptop?"

"No, it's in his room."

"We'll find him, Don. I'll get David and Colby on it, too."

"Thanks."

Don hung up and found his father was staring at him. "Donny, what if... What if it's-"

"No, Dad! I refuse to think that. Okay? We're going to find him and he'll be fine, okay?"

Alan flinched at Don's harshness, but nodded in agreement. He had to believe that.

"I'll leave you two alone for a minute," Larry said as he stepped out.

Don wanted to lash out at something. He wanted to get up and run. He wanted to chase after his brother, but he didn't know where he'd go. How could he have not known Charlie was missing? Why did he assume he was at work? With Jake after him, Don should have known to check on his brother repeatedly. That's how accidents happened. That's what got Charlie hurt... and that was what would get him killed.

No. Don couldn't think that. Charlie would be okay. He just got mad and left for a while. Maybe he just needed to clear his head or something. He'd be back later. He always came back.

"Donny, what do we do?" Alan asked.

"We look for him."

"Don, you know you're not supposed to be up," Alan said as Don tried to get up.

"I have to look."

Alan walked over and pushed his son back down gently. He sat in front of Don, locking eyes with him.

"No. You have to stay here. If Charlie is going to come home, someone has to be here. You're not well enough to come out. You're not supposed to be moving around so much. Let me handle this, please. I don't want you to get hurt, too."

Don looked away. He knew this was what he was supposed to do, but he wasn't good at sitting around while everyone else did the work. He hoped he'd be able to survive this time.

"Alan!" Larry called as he came walking quickly into the room. He looked between Alan and Don and then focused only on Alan.

"What is it?"

"I need you to see this."

Alan followed Larry out into the garage. "What?"

Larry pointed to certain spots on the chalkboards. "I-I recognized this work. Charlie asked for my help on the physics of this problem once before. It has to do with bullets."

"Bullets?"

"Precisely. I'm familiar enough with this work to know that these points don't fit." Larry took a piece of chalk and circled the areas that weren't supposed to be there.

"What does that mean?"

Larry moved to a blank board and wrote out what the letters that didn't belong spelled.

"I am sorry."

Alan felt tears fill his eyes as he stepped to the chalkboard. "Oh, Charlie. You have nothing to be sorry for."

**Finally! I'm sorry it's taken so long. It seems like there's been one writing assignment after the other. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter. Sorry there were so many scene changes. I hope that wasn't annoying or anything.**

**Thank you, FraidyCat, for your help with this chapter! She had the idea that Charlie should work with bullets and for him to run away. Thank you!**


	17. So How Could I Let You Go?

Charlie didn't know why he would trust a woman like Janet Waits. After what her son put him through, he shouldn't even be in contact with her. But he was. And now he was going to her house.

"Do you want any music?" Janet asked as she drove.

Charlie shook his head no. He didn't want any music. He wanted to be left alone. He wanted to be safe. He wanted to stop living in fear. He wanted to be at home. He wanted his family to be safe. But Janet couldn't give him those things. Who could?

"You're not in a very talkative mood, are you?"

Charlie briefly looked at her and saw she was smiling at him. He tried to smile back, but it was small and forced. He hoped she'd understand.

"You know, having three boys of my own, I get used to knowing what's wrong and why. I think it's pretty obvious what's wrong in your life, but I don't really see that on your face right now. Something else is bothering you."

Janet pulled into a long driveway and up to a brick, two-story house. It was well kept, the grass neatly mown and the gardens well-tended. It definitely looked like a welcoming place. Perhaps Charlie could find some peace here.

"Come inside," Janet said, leading the way. She took out the keys from her purse and quickly unlocked the door. Charlie stepped inside her living room. The wood floors were spotless, making it seem that three boys shouldn't have lived there. Pictures lined her walls, and Charlie had to stop when he saw Carl's face looking at him.

"Charlie?" Janet placed her hand on Charlie's upper arm and he flinched away. She followed his gaze and gasped. "Oh, I'm so sorry. If I had thought about it, I would have taken it down before you came inside. Obviously I didn't expect you to be here, but I'll take care of that now."

Janet swiftly moved to take down Carl's most recent pictures. Even though he had not known Carl when he was younger, his horrible eyes still looked at him in his younger years. Charlie knew which one he was in every picture. His eyes weren't easily forgotten.

Janet turned around after putting the photos away. "Now, would you like to have a seat? I could get your something to drink if you'd like."

Charlie nodded in response.

"Well, what would you like?"

Charlie just looked at her, hoping his eyes would voice what he felt. He honestly didn't care. She smiled softly in response. "I'll get you some iced tea."

Charlie smiled his thank-you as she left to go into the kitchen. He sat down on the couch and shivered at the thought that Carl had sat there once before, too. Everything about this house made him think of Carl. For a while now, he hadn't thought about him; his main focus was on Jake. But, now, surrounded by Carl's house, he felt him creeping back into his life.

_I could kill you right now._

Charlie shook his head, fighting away Carl's voice. It wasn't allowed in anymore. It was finally gone, and he wouldn't let it back in.

"Here you go," Janet said as she handed Charlie the glass. She sat across from him in a reclining chair. She brought her own glass of tea to her mouth a took a short sip.

"Well, it's apparent that you don't want to talk about what else is bothering you right now, so do you mind if I tell you about Carl now?"

Charlie shook his head no. It was her house, her rules. He figured he might as well get this over with so maybe he'd be done facing this family for good. Maybe then he could finally be free of Carl's presence.

"Before Carl was kidnapped, he wasn't a bad boy at all; quite the opposite, actually. He never got in trouble, never back-talked, nothing. He was the ideal son. We actually

wanted him to get in trouble for once." Janet laughed as she remembered how her son had been before the abduction. "It didn't make sense to us when he was kidnapped. We didn't come from a wealthy family. But he had been taken from me, and, knowing that we wouldn't be able to pay to get him back, I felt like I'd lost him for good.

"While he was kidnapped, the men who took him did the most awful things to him. They didn't just attack him physically; they attacked him mentally, too. They would tell him that we

were there to get him back. He'd get his hopes up and he'd run to the door. When we weren't there, he would stop and stare, and eventually he would cry. He was old enough to remember everything. At fifteen, it was strange that he'd been kidnapped. Usually younger children are the victims. But the men who took him, they went after older children, mostly teenagers. That way they'd be sure to remember everything that happened."

Janet paused and shivered. Charlie leaned forward on the couch. This was getting interesting. It didn't seem like Carl could have actually been formed into such a bad person. He just assumed some evil had resided inside him all his life. It was the only thing that made sense to him.

"Carl was... he was shown pictures of our family. Apparently they had been planning the kidnapping for months before. They did their homework. They found out everything about us.

They used that information to pretend we had told the kidnappers that. And he believed them. They were that convincing. They had even convinced him that we had adopted him and hadn't told him. He's my son! I thought he always knew that. He looked just like his father. How could we have adopted him?" Even now, Janet didn't know why Carl had believed them for a second. She shook her head. She had showered him with love all his life. She had never shown favorites with her boys. What could make him think he was different?

"Anyway, the men were good with computers. They took the photos they had taken of us and had put them in different situations. He showed us, supposedly after Carl was kidnapped, partying outside. They had taken Carl out of the picture so he would think we didn't care that he was gone. He was so wrong. I don't think I smiled once during the time he was gone. He had kidnapped for a week. A week!"

Janet's voice was strained, almost hysterical. She hated trying to relive the worst week of her life. It just didn't seem like she could get past that time. It had been so terrible. By the third day, she began to think he was dead. The idea of losing one of her boys had petrified her... now she only had one son left. Sometimes she amazed herself with how she still managed to survive. And with the threat of losing her only son...

"They did countless things to him. They got him so upset that they made him hate us. He began to hate our family. It was awful. They'd bring him a picture every day of us. They even brought in a picture of a tombstone with his name on it and then party balloons around it. He was so naive! We never, ever would have done that. Who does? Honestly, who does?" Janet couldn't imagine a family so cruel.

"The thing that... that finally got to Carl was when the men told him they killed us. They somehow managed to get pictures of us where we looked dead. I don't know, maybe they took them in our sleep. Anyway, they convinced Carl that they practically slaughtered us... and it was because that's what he had wanted."

Janet dabbed at her eyes when she felt moisture. Now was not the time to cry. "He never told us, but he wrote in his journal that he had screamed and cried, explaining that he had never wanted that; he never wanted us to get hurt. It was shortly after that that Todd was kidnapped, too, and when Carl saw him, he felt so relieved. He thought that it would be over. He knew he wouldn't have to worry about those men anymore. But Todd wouldn't take his place."

Janet paused once more to compose herself. This was the hardest part. "I-I never knew it before. But after Carl died, I found that journal. He said that, in that moment, when Todd wouldn't save him, he realized that us getting killed was really what he had wanted."

Charlie felt a shudder run through him and he knew Janet had to have seen it. Carl had been through hell and back. He couldn't imagine what the people that kidnapped Carl had been like, but he could only think that they must have been like Carl. To have such a horrid start in life. Fifteen is too young to have your world turned upside down, your whole being changed. He couldn't imagine how awful that had been.

He could feel some sympathy toward Carl, but it still didn't make up for what he'd been put through. As if reading his thoughts, Janet spoke.

"I know that doesn't excuse what he did, but that's why he was that way. Jake... Jake actually had been with Carl throughout that experience. He hadn't been treated quite so bad mentally, but he had been beaten physically. I hadn't known him before then, but his mother told me that he was never a bad boy. Those men made them into monsters. Jake had no pity for the world after that. He felt that everyone deserved to be put through what he had been. And in a way, Carl did, too. They were never the same after that. I lost my Carl after that. He never looked at us the same way again. We hired psychiatrists, anyone who could help him. But nothing worked. The old Carl died. I never got him back."

Janet stood and got a tissue to wipe her wet eyes. It seemed so awful to tell the story about Carl. He deserved better in life, but he had been so horrid after the kidnapping. She remembered when she saw him strike a wounded bird for no reason; it was obvious that it was not done out of mercy. He had actual laughed after he had done it. Despite how he had become, Janet had still loved her boy. She just had to think of him as they way he had been before.

"Thank you," Charlie said to her when she turned around to face him once more. "I know that must have been hard."

"Thanks. It was."

Charlie smiled at her. Though her son had done such terrible things, he couldn't really blame her. She didn't seem like a bad person. She wasn't the monster he had thought her to be. She was a person. Just like everyone else. He hadn't seen it before, but he saw her how she was now. A mother who loved her son.

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Megan, Colby, and David went to CalSci. Though Larry had said he hadn't been at the campus, they had to find out where he may have gone. Even if it had only been a moment. Maybe he had passed by the campus and someone saw him. They would explore the possibilities. Charlie was one of their own. They had to find him.

They were questioning students in the cafeteria when they got their first lead. Megan was talking to a young man who said he had seen Charlie along the highway.

"Where was he? What was he doing?"

"He was just walking along the highway. I thought it was a dangerous place for him to be, so I was going to pull over to see if he needed a ride. I was too late, though, because a woman picked him up instead."

"Who was she? What did she look like?"

"I recognized her from the news. She had been on after her son was killed. Someone interviewed her or something. I thought it was strange that Charlie would get in the car with the mother of that guy who hurt him."

Megan's eyes widened as she turned away. "Thanks for your help," she said softly.

"No prob!" the student called after her.

Colby and David spotted Megan and saw the look on her face. They left the students they were questioning and came to her.

"What is it?" David asked.

"Charlie's with Carl Waits' mother."

Colby and David looked at each other in surprise. "Did he go willingly?" Colby asked

"I don't know. We need to get any information on her. I don't want her with that woman any longer."

David nodded. "I'll call back at the office and have them look her up."

"Good."

Megan walked outside and sat down as she waited for David. Colby came up and sat beside her. "You okay?"

"It's Carl's mother. Why should I be okay?"

Colby nodded in understanding. "We'll get him back. He'll be fine."

"I hope so."

Colby squeezed her hand comfortingly.

David came back shortly after. "I've got an address. Let's go."

The three agents went back to their car and drove off. Megan silently prayed that Charlie would be okay, and the other two joined her.

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Alan returned from another search for Charlie. He went to every restaurant he could remember Charlie going to. He stopped by Margaret's grave. He could not find his son, and it terrified him. It had been hours, but how much longer had he been gone before he realized? How could he not notice his son was missing?

Don looked up when Alan came in. He was hoping to see Charlie, but wasn't too surprised when he didn't. "No luck?"

Alan shook his head grimly. "Nothing. I'm worried, Donny. Where could he be?"

Don shook his head. "I'll call Megan."

He took out his cell phone and dialed the familiar number. Megan answered on the second ring. "Hello?"

"It's Don. What's going on?"

Megan looked at Colby, who was in the back seat. "It's Don," she mouthed. She wasn't sure what to tell him. How could she tell him where Charlie was?

Colby held his hand out and took the phone from him.

"Hello?" Don asked, wondering what happened.

"It's me. Look, Don, we think we know where Charlie is."

"Really? Where?"

Colby sighed. This was the hard part. "One of the students at CalSci said they saw him get in the car with... with Janet Waits, Carl's mother."

Don's blood ran cold. With Carl's mother? Who knew what she might do to him? Maybe she was in on it with Jake!

"Don? It'll be okay, man. We're going to her house right now. We'll call you when we get him, okay?" Colby waited for a response. He didn't get one after three minutes had passed. "Don?"

"Okay."

"Good. We'll call you later. Bye."

Don just hung up the phone. He felt chills pass through his body. He pressed his hands to his face and moaned. _Charlie, please be okay._

"Donny?" Alan spoke, startling his son. Don had forgotten that his father was there.

"What is it, son?"

Don sighed and looked up from his hands. "I'm going to get Charlie."

Don pushed himself up, gritting his teeth as pain erupted in his sides. Alan stood and pushed him back down. "No, you're not. Now, tell me. What's going on?"

Don looked up at his father, who stood above him. "He... he's with Carl Waits' mother."

Alan gasped, placing his hand over his mouth. "No. He-he can't be there!"

Don nodded in confirmation. "Colby, Megan, and David are going to get him right now... I'm scared, Dad."

Alan's heart broke at Don's confession. His son was almost never scared. And if he ever was, he would never let it show, much less voice his fear. Alan sat down on the couch beside him and stretched his arm across his shoulders and squeezed. "It'll be okay, Donny. Charlie will be okay."

Alan prayed that the three agents would be successful in getting his son back... in one piece.

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"What happened to your husband?" Charlie asked, since she had never said anything about his death. A shadow passed over her face and she spoke in a harsh tone.

"Cancer... he died of cancer."

Realizing that she assumed he thought Carl had killed him, Charlie shook his head. "I was only asking. My mother died of cancer, too."

Janet's face softened. "I'm sorry. You know what it's like then."

"Well, for the most part. I... I wasn't with my mother the last three months of her life." Even now, Charlie felt the guilt.

"Oh? Why is that?"

"I... I couldn't deal with it. She was so sick, and, I... I was supposed to help her, fix her. Math was supposed to solve all the world's problems. Why not cancer, too?"

Janet nodded in understanding. "Yes, I know. I wanted to believe that if I was a better person, if I changed my ways, maybe God would show mercy toward my husband. He was my rock. I don't know how I've made it so long, having lost so many loved ones."

"You're a strong woman."

Janet smiled. "Thank you. Now that I've finally got you talking, what exactly were you running from?"

Charlie looked down at the floor. He wasn't running from something. He wasn't afraid. He was just trying to save his family. "I couldn't... couldn't wait around for my family to get hurt. Don had already been hurt once because of me. I won't let it happen again. So I won't be going back."

Janet paused, thinking about that. "Don't you think they'd be happier with you in their lives? Don't you think that they'd rather take the risk of getting hurt than live without you?"

Charlie shook his head. "They might be. But I don't want to give them that option. I could never live with myself if something happened to them. They're my life."

She knew what that was like. She watched Charlie as he rubbed his forehead and recognized the signs of a migraine. "You should go to bed, dear. I have a guest room, if you'd like to lie down for a while."

Charlie looked up at her and smiled. "That would be nice."

Janet led the way to a room on the top floor. Charlie took off his shoes and went to the bed. "Thank you, Janet."

"You're welcome. Sleep well."

Janet left Charlie in her guest room... Carl's old room.

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Megan, David, and Colby were all outside the house. They had looked inside the house through binoculars and saw that Janet Waits was unarmed. Taking that as their sign to move in, the three agents opened the door without welcome.

Janet gasped as she stood quickly from her seat on the couch. "What are you doing?" she exclaimed.

"Where's Charlie?" David demanded, his voice threatening.

Suddenly a scream rang out and the agents recognized Charlie's voice.

Colby charged at her and pinned her against the wall, not caring one bit that she was a woman. "You'd better pray that he's all right."

While Colby kept an eye on Janet, Megan and David ran upstairs and found Charlie. He was not being attacked. He was having a nightmare. Megan walked to the bed and started shaking Charlie's shoulder. He thrashed about in the bed, looking as though he was throwing a temper tantrum. David came over and stayed his hands while Megan worked to wake him up.

"Charlie! Charlie, wake up!" she shouted until he finally jolted in the bed. He couldn't get up because David's hands pinned him down. When he saw he was awake, David let go.

"Are you all right?" Megan asked hurriedly, searching for injury on Charlie.

"I... I'm fine. What are you doing here?"

"Charlie, you've been missing. Your family has been worried sick. Hell, we have! Why wouldn't we be here?"

Charlie slowly sat up. "Because you're... you're not supposed to be here. I didn't want to be found. I... I don't want to go home."

Megan and David looked at each other. What did he mean?

"Come on, Charlie. We should go," Megan said, despite what Charlie had just said.

Charlie moved away from the two agents. "Don't you get it? I don't want to go home! I can't go home! Don nearly got killed because of me. I can't stand by and let him die! He and Dad will be better off without me. At least I'll know they're safe."

David and Megan could hardly believe what they were hearing. Charlie was so wrong. Don and Alan only suffered without Charlie. They were worried sick! They needed him, and he needed them. Why would they stand in their way?

"Charlie, listen to me. Your family is not going to be better off without me, understand? They need you, Charlie. They've been worried sick. We all have been. Please, Charlie. Come home with us. We won't let anything happen to Don or Alan."

"You can't guarantee that. No one can guarantee the future, at least not my future."

"Yes, I can. You and your family are going to get through this, but you can't do it while you're separated. You have to work this out together."

Charlie looked away from the agent's face. Resigned, he let David lead him outside. Colby let go of Janet's arm when the agents came down with Charlie. He was relieved to see his friend okay. Perhaps they had all been too close to the case, but he couldn't imagine anyone who could have stopped them from searching for Charlie. He was glad they had been successful.

After confirming that Janet had not taken Charlie against his will, the agents drove Charlie home. Alan was watching the window impatiently when they pulled into the driveway. He turned to Don, who was looking equally anxious.

"They're here!" he shouted, running for the door.

Alan met the agents as they opened up the door. Colby helped an exhausted Charlie out of the back seat and Alan ran up and swallowed his son in a tight embrace. Charlie held onto his father in return, though it felt forced. He had wanted to be home. It was the place he always wanted to be. But this time, he knew he couldn't be there. He couldn't put his family's lives at risk. It was too dangerous for them, for himself, to be near them. Maybe he should leave again. But being back with them, though not even after a day, Charlie couldn't imagine leaving them again.

Alan kissed his son on the forehead, then let him go so he could go inside to Don. Alan hugged the three agents who had brought his little boy home, thanking each one for helping.

Charlie stood at the closed front door. He knew Don would be waiting anxiously, with no way of getting to him because of his injuries. He didn't want to face his brother. He didn't want him to get hurt. How could he have let it happen before? How could he live with himself for being responsible for Don getting shot?

With more courage than he thought he had, Charlie opened the door and walked to the living room, seeing the back of Don's head. Don quickly turned to face his brother and Charlie was surprised to see tears in his eyes.

"Buddy." The one word held all the worry and love Don felt toward his little brother. Charlie eagerly circled the couch and sat beside his brother and was immediately pulled into a hug.

"I'm so glad you're okay."

"I'm sorry," Charlie cried once more. He had never meant for his brother to get hurt.

"You're home now, Charlie. It's okay, Buddy."

Charlie was home, but it definitely was not okay.

**Oh, another delay to updating. My apologies once more. Well, part of this was FraidyCat's idea again, so thank you once more for that! I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. I'm sorry Carl's story didn't end up being all that exciting. I wanted it to have a big bang to it, but I just couldn't pull anything together for it. I hope it was believable, though. Sorry again for the jumping around, but their were just so many point of views I had to get in! Thanks for reading. I'll see you next chapter, whenever that may be. LOL**

**As you can see, I somehow managed to come out of my Numb3rs-induced depression over beloved Colby. I even had him in this chapter. sniffles It was hard, but I did it. That did affect the timing of my updating.**


	18. I Try to Hide What I Feel

When he got home after being "missing" for almost a day, Charlie went to his room and fell into an exhausted sleep. His feet hurt, his legs hurt, and his ribs seemed to scream at him with pain. Alan came in to check on him several times, waking him up with each intrusion. He finally brought a chair in and sat down beside his son and spent the night in Charlie's room. During the night, Charlie woke with a searing pain in his sides. Alan rushed out of the room and brought him his pain killers that he hadn't taken in so long. Charlie squeezed his father's hand until the pain finally began to ease. Sleep was impossible until he was finally comfortable again.

Don spent most of the night awake. He had been so worried about Charlie. He couldn't help but blame himself for Charlie getting hurt and for him running away. But something continued to bother him. Megan, Colby, and David came inside after they brought Charlie home. They explained what had happened and it just didn't seem to fit. Why would Charlie be with Janet Waits? From what the three agents told him, he had been there willingly. They couldn't get much out of Charlie about it, but that much had been clear. He hadn't pressed charges, had told them he had willingly gotten in the car with her. They even said he was asleep in her home when they found him. What had possessed him to do something like that? Did he not realize how much danger he had put himself in?

Don couldn't decide how he was going to handle bringing it up with Charlie. He didn't want to scream, yell, but that's what he felt like doing. Charlie had put him and Alan through hell while he was away. But was Charlie being threatened by Janet? Was that why he had covered for her? Maybe. And if that was the case, he shouldn't yell at Charlie. But what if he actually was spending time with the woman? Her son had been so intent on killing him. What if she wanted to finish what her son let off? What if she was working with Jake?

That had been a question Don hadn't thought of. It sent his heart racing. He grabbed his phone and called the three agents, asking them to bring Janet in for questioning about Jake.

The next morning, he was still indecisive about Charlie. He managed to keep his questions at bay until that afternoon. Charlie looked awful when he got up in the morning, so Don let him off easy. He barely looked at Don, and hardly spoke to him or their father. He moped about the house and stepped outside a few hours after breakfast. Alan panicked. He ran after Charlie, who had only made it to the porch swing, where he sat when Alan came running outside.

"I'm still here," he said quietly to his father. Alan had run to the edge of the porch and was looking both ways for Charlie, not even noticing that his son was right behind him.

"Oh, thank God," Alan whispered as he turned around to face him. Charlie looked up at him, his face expressionless. Alan came up to him and sat down, pushing the swing.

"I'm sorry I scared you, Dad," Charlie said, staring ahead, instead of at his father.

Alan nodded slowly. He knew his son hadn't meant to let it happen, but something had driven him away. He had read the "I am sorry" on the board. Something had scared him away. He wanted to know what.

"Why, Charlie? Why did you leave?"

It was a question Charlie couldn't answer, not with complete honesty at least. "I can't take it, Dad. It's... it's complicated."

"What is?"

"I can't let you and Don get hurt, not again."

"But, Charlie, you never let us get hurt in the first place!"

Charlie stood from the porch swing. "Yes, I did."

Charlie went back inside without saying another word. He went back to his room and slept for another hour before coming downstairs again. When he did, he found Don waiting to talk with him. He wanted to escape again. He felt like the next time Don or Alan would get hurt was a time bomb, waiting to go off. He didn't know how long he had, but he didn't expect it to be long.

"Hey, Buddy, can I talk to you for a while?"

_No_, Charlie wanted to answer, but didn't. He sat down across from his older brother, expecting what was about to come. He knew it was only a matter of time before his brother confronted him about yesterday.

"Charlie, I need to talk to you about yesterday, about Janet Waits."

Yep, he'd seen that coming a mile away.

"What about her?"

"Did she threaten you in any way? Did she say anything about her connections with Jake?"

"No. She was nice to me. I was walking alone and she offered me a ride when I was about to collapse. I accepted and she took me to her house. We talked for a while, and I asked if I could take a nap later."

"So, you knew her before this had happened?" Don wasn't sure he wanted to hear his brother's answer.

"Yes."

So Charlie wasn't being threatened, should he be telling the truth. Basically, that gave Don a right to yell at him.

"What? Charlie, do you have any idea how stupid that was?" Don screamed.

Charlie inwardly groaned at his brother's predictability. He had seen it coming all along. Why must Don yell at him over this? It was so unimportant now.

"She could have killed you! Do I have to remind you what Carl did to you?"

Charlie's heart beat faster. Why did Don even ask that question? Of course he didn't. Charlie remembered every day what he'd been put through. It was why he had tried to run away. Carl was going to kill Don and Alan. He was not about to let that happen again, even if it hadn't been Jake who had been the real threat to them this time... it was him.

"What if she was working with Jake? Or, rather, what if she _is_ working with Jake? I can't believe you would even consider talking to this woman. You have no idea what she is capable of. What if you'd been killed? How do you think Dad and I would have felt? And it would have been for nothing! You would just have been too stupid to realize what you'd done! You have to think, Charlie! And what were you doing running off anyway? You didn't have anything with you even, or at least anything of importance!"

That hurt. Charlie had brought a notebook and pens and pencils. Some of his best work came from just that. In fact, he had brought a notebook that had some of his best work. It was important to him because it helped him understand the risk his brother was taking. It helped him understand what could potentially kill Don... bullets.

"I just... I can't understand why you would run away like that! A water bottle and some paper isn't going to do a whole hell of a lot of good when Jake comes after you. What if he was the one who picked you up? Huh? What then, Charlie? You tell me, 'cause I can't understand why you would do something so stupid."

There it was again. Stupid. It was one of the words that Charlie despised. It was one he could never stand when he was being called that. Don didn't completely come out and say it, but he was definitely implying that that's what he was. It was too much for Charlie. Needing to get away from his brother, he stood without looking at Don.

"I... I can't, I couldn't deal with it, okay? I-I-I tried before, but I can't do it. Not this time. I don't know how I managed to with Carl, but this time I just... I won't do it. Okay?"

Don's face finally softened and he took in his brother's words. "What can't you deal with, Charlie?"

Charlie's face scrunched up as he felt fresh tears come to his eyes. He bit his lower lip and shook his head. He couldn't break... but he was falling apart.

"I can't... I can't lose you, or Dad. I can't deal with that. With Carl, it was like... everything was about you or Dad. He was trying everything he could to get to me by hurting you two. It terrified me, but somehow I managed to get through it. I can't do it... not again."

Charlie took a slow step and turned his back on Don. His shoulders rose as he heaved against a sob. He bit it away, trying to hide from his brother the pain he was going through.

Don, resisting the pain in his chest as he stood up, went to his brother. With slow steps he made his way toward Charlie.

"Buddy, nothing has happened to either of us. Jake has stayed away. I don't... I don't know what you're so worried about."

Charlie turned around quickly, anger written on his face at his brother's ignorance. "Don, it's you! Do you think that you would have gotten shot twice if you hadn't been thinking about me that day? No! You're a better agent than that. You do your job and you don't think twice about making the right decisions. You lost that when you focused on me instead of your work. It nearly cost you your life. If it had, I wouldn't have known I was responsible, but, damnit, I know now! How do you think that makes me feel? You could have died, Don!" As if that thought were just occurring to him,

Charlie stumbled as his knees buckled. "My, God." Charlie looked at Don with wide eyes. "You could have died." Charlie fell forward and Don managed to keep him up. "It... it would have been all my fault. Without me, you never would have gotten hurt."

Charlie pushed away from his brother, and Don was momentarily relieved due to the pain the pressure was causing him. But when Charlie stepped away from him with that panicked look in his eyes, he'd deal with the pain if it meant Charlie would stay put.

"I can't stay here. I-I-I can't. I should have... should have stayed away." He turned and started for the door, breaking into a run. He was stopped when he plowed into his father, who grabbed onto his son.

"Where are you going?" Alan asked, oblivious to what had just been going on.

"I have to go. I can't stay here." Charlie pushed his father's arms away, not wanting to be held back. He had to get out, but Alan's hands were strong. "Let me go, Dad. I need to go. I have to. Please."

Alan looked over Charlie's head at Don, hoping for some explanation as to why Charlie had to leave. Don's eyes held pain and worry, so Alan forced his son to stay put. He

wrapped his arms tightly around Charlie and his son fought him. Charlie punched at his father, begging to be let go.

"No! Stop it! I can't stay here! Let me go! Let me go!"

Charlie managed to get away for a brief second before his father's hand grabbed his wrist and brought him full-force into his chest. As if Alan's chest were a wall in his way, Charlie pounded on it with his fists, crying out to be freed. He couldn't stay here or Don would surely die. He loved his brother and wanted to stay, but he couldn't if it meant Don would be killed. He'd rather not be around his family and they be alive than being near them, waiting for one of them to die.

His strength waning, soon Charlie's blows weakened to the point they didn't hurt at all. Alan grabbed hold of his son's wrists, knowing the fight was out of his son. He let Charlie stand there, crying and looking around his surroundings like he didn't know where he was. When his eyes settled on his father's face, he broke into sobs as he launched himself into Alan's arms.

"Sh, sh. I've got you." Alan held Charlie up when his own legs wouldn't. He led his son to the couch where Don now sat, looking horrified at his younger brother. Charlie's sobs turned into wails as he sank to the couch, leaning on his father for support. Alan had no idea what had just happened, but he knew that both his sons were obviously upset. He would get to the bottom of it, but first he had to take care of Charlie. His son had been known to have panic attacks before, and he was afraid Charlie would have one now if he didn't stop it. So he tightened his arms around his son, letting Charlie's face get pressed into the crook of his neck. He felt the tears instantly wet his neck. As though realizing he was making loud noises, Charlie stifled his cry as he pressed his mouth into his father's shirt. Still, Don and Alan heard the scream. Don's heart felt like it was being ripped in two.

"I won't let it happen again. I promise, Charlie," Don told his brother as he leaned close to Charlie's ear, so he'd be sure to hear him.

It was too much for Charlie. The fear of Carl's threats still plagued him and with this added terror, he was pushed over the edge. How was he supposed to be a part of his family's life when all he brought was danger to them? He couldn't put them at risk. But leaving them would break his heart. He had managed it before, but he hadn't really been thinking. He would do it, if he needed to, but it would kill him to.

They were all that mattered though. He didn't matter anymore. His own health and life meant nothing if they weren't in it, so why should he worry about himself? Charlie worried about his family and keeping them safe. They were the important ones.

Charlie reached over and latched onto a fistful of Don's shirt. He pulled his brother closer to him and whispered hoarsely to him, "I love you."

Don's eyes searched his brother's. Charlie had ended his crying but there was such an emptiness to him that it tore at Don. What could he do to protect his brother? He was useless. Don realized that they were both struggling to survive this whole situation. He looked up at their father. He was the only one who had kept it together, their rock.

Charlie turned back to his father and hugged him tightly around the waist. "I'm sorry, Dad. I'm sorry I hurt you. I love you."

Alan's heart constricted. Rarely did he hear his boys tell him that, though he always knew it was true. What was his son going through? What caused him to talk like this, break like he just had?Something was seriously wrong and it seemed like there was no solution to it. Not until Jake was out of the picture.

Charlie slipped out of his father's arms and slowly went up the stairs to his room. Too shocked over Charlie's emotional breakdown, Don and Alan let him go alone. As soon as they heard his door close, they turned to each other.

"What in the world just happened?" Alan asked Don, knowing he had been there before he had.

Don shook his head, blowing out his breath in a huff. "I don't know, Dad. I just... I shouldn't have cornered him like that, but I needed answers. I asked him about Janet and I yelled at him over it. I shouldn't have done it. If I had known that would happen," Don waved his hand as if to indicate where it had happened, "I never would have done it."

"Did you get much out of him, like why he ran away?"

"No. He just kept saying how he couldn't let anything happen to us again, not that anything did with Carl. Dad, he's having a lot of trouble with this. I thought he told us everything about Carl, but it's gotten to him a lot worse than we thought. He's paranoid that something will happen to us. I... I don't know what to do."

Alan smiled. "The same thing you always do. You make it better."

"How? I can't find Jake. I've had agents working on this case for months-" Don's words came in a rush, but Alan interrupted.

"I didn't say you had to do all that, Donny. All it takes is for you to go up there, talk to your brother, and he'll feel better automatically. You know that's what he needs."

Don smiled in return. "You think so?"

"I know so."

Alan stood and helped Don up to avoid hurting his already sore chest. He had strained it too much today so he'd have to be careful. The doctors said if he was too rough with it he could break one of his ribs and puncture a lung. So Don took the stairs slowly, one at a time.

Don knocked lightly on the door to Charlie's room when he made it upstairs. Charlie didn't respond so Don opened the door for himself. He didn't see his brother, which concerned him. He went to the bathroom door and found Charlie inside puking. His whole body jerked forward with every wave of nausea, as though the vomit was coming up faster than he could release it. Don was too preoccupied with moving to his brother to consider calling for Alan. He came up behind Charlie and held his brother's hair back.

As Charlie was emptying the contents of his stomach, his hand slipped and he hit his head on the hard toilet seat. Don grabbed him by the shoulders to keep him steady. When the last wave passed, Charlie slumped to the floor out of Don's hands.

"My God, Buddy. What happened? Are you okay?"

It was then that Don noticed that Charlie had something in his hands. Charlie followed his brother's gaze to the papers in his hand and he shook his head, pressing them to his chest so that Don couldn't see what was on the front.

"What is that, Charlie?"

Charlie shook his head as tears slipped out of the corner of his eyes. He couldn't let Don see. He would handle it. But how? As the image flashed in his mind, he jerked again, this time out of fear.

"What is it, Charlie?"

Still Charlie wouldn't let his brother see. So Don came at him, thankfully not breaking his aching ribs. He pulled the papers out of his brother's hands.

"No!" Charlie screamed, but it was too late. Don turned the papers over and found that the top two were photos. He stared at the top one, horrified to find he was in the picture.

Jake was crouched at the top of a stone wall, barely visible to the gathered people below. He was taking aim at a particular person... Don. Don was talking on his cell phone as he made his way to his SUV, just outside of CalSci. Jake wore a broad grin on his face as he aimed at Don, his finger already on the trigger. Much to Don's horror, the next photo showed Jake pointing the same gun at Alan, who was standing in the front half of his and Charlie's home. It looked like Alan was looking at a photo of his wife, Margaret, and Jake was on the roof of the house next door, hidden by the large, brick chimney. Again that sadistic smile was on Jake's face as he took aim at the most important people in Charlie's life.

The last page had writing on it. All it said was, "I need only pull the trigger."

Don turned back to Charlie, who was shaking uncontrollably between the toilet and the bathtub. Don, equally shaken, managed to cover his fear as he slid over to his brother. Charlie looked up at Don when he grabbed his shoulder in a gentle grip.

"He's going to kill you, Donny. Please... run away. Go some place safe. Wait until he kills me. That's all he really wants. Let him kill me instead. Please, Don! Don't make me go through this!"

It may have been what his brother wanted, but there was no way that Don would abandon him now. He would stand by him to the end, whenever that may be.

"I'm not going anywhere, Buddy. We're going to fight this, okay? We'll get through this together. I'll hire agents to follow all three of us. We'll be fine, I promise."

Don prayed that his promise would not prove false.

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"He just left," Janet spoke into the cell phone. She looked around her, as though she should expect someone to be there. "Good. Did you tell him about Alan and Don? Did you tell him that I was going to kill them?"

"Yes," Janet lied. She had been told to tell Charlie all these horrible things, help Jake torture the poor man. She didn't have the heart to do it, even though her son's life could be at stake.

Jake laughed evilly. "Perfect. I'll fulfill my threat later. Great work, Janet. Oh, and Justin says 'hi.'"

The phone line went dead as Jake hung up. Janet bit back tears at the thought of losing her son. What would she do without him? Justin was all she had left. She couldn't lose him, on top of all the others. First she lost her husband Ian when Jake took a knife to his back... twelve times. She didn't know what lies her son had told him, but Ian had been a good father. Then Carl killed Todd. Even before they discovered the body, she knew that Carl had done it, and she knew that Todd was dead. She thought about poor Lana, his wife. She had been so devastated, but somehow she had

managed to survive. She was happy that her daughter-in-law had found someone new to marry. She deserved happiness.

And then Charlie killed Carl. Though she hated to admit it, Janet felt some relief when it happened. She knew her son was bound for jail whenever he got caught. He had had it coming for so long. At least he died before he went to prison. Knowing Carl, he would have found a way out. She thought the threat to her family was over. But Jake was still there.

Janet took a deep breath to pull herself together. She raised the cell phone to her ear once more after punching in a few familiar numbers.

"Director Merrick."

"Hey, Walt. It's Janet. I just got off the phone with Jake. I traced his call to a north tower near downtown LA. The call didn't last long enough for me to get any farther."

"That's good, that's good. Any little bit helps. Good work,

Agent."

Janet smiled, still pleased every time she heard that.

"Thanks. I'll keep you updated."

"Good."

"Bye."

Janet clicked off her phone and smiled to herself. At least she was a part of the process.

**Geesh, guys! Why didn't you tell me about all these mistakes? As you can tell, I reposted this with a bunch of corrections. Here's my original message.**

**AHA! Didn't see that coming, did you? LOL Okay, some of you may have. I hope you all like it. She's not all bad. Oh, and for those of you who didn't know, Director Merrick's first name is Walt. It seems like most stories don't have his first name in it, so I put it in there. If you look at the guest stars from the first episode, you'll see that it says "Walt Merrick." Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter and we'll move on to more angst in the next chapter, just not so overloaded next time. :-D**


	19. From Those Who Matter Most

"Charlie, where was this?" Don asked his younger brother gently, realizing that Charlie was still very frightened.

"O-over there." Charlie pointed to his bed. It had just been laying there, casually. What made Jake do these things? Why must he be tortured? The idea of Jake pointing a gun at his brother and father sent chills down Charlie's spine. He could not let that happen! He would rather die. The picture was always there in his mind. He could see it every time he blinked, which was why he was trying to avoid doing just that. Still, Don held the actual photos in his hands. If he wasn't careful, the photo would be face up and he'd have to see it once more. The smile on Jake's face terrified him. It made Charlie know that Jake really was insane. He was sadistic. He was enjoying himself.

Charlie had managed to stop crying, but the fear seemed to sit in his stomach. Even swallowing the spit in his mouth seemed to make his stomach as heavy as an anvil. His heart still beat at an irregular speed, but he had gained some control over his appearance.

"Come on, Buddy. I'll help you up." Don held out his hands to his brother, but Charlie stood up on his own. Still, Don grabbed his elbow to support him, which was good because Charlie's legs felt too weak to hold himself upright for long. He had lost energy from losing what food he had eaten that day. He was thankful for his bed being so close. When he reached it, he laid down quickly.

"You want me to get Dad?" Don asked.

Charlie shook his head. "No."

Don nodded, understanding that to mean he wanted to be alone. But when he stood, Charlie reached out to him.

"Don't go... please."

So instead Don moved to the other side of the bed and gently eased onto it. Charlie smiled shyly at his brother, thankful that Don had stayed. He wasn't sure if he could handle being alone right now. It was hard enough on him. Obviously Jake had been here, or else he had sent someone. There had to be a way to get him away. Perhaps they should move. Even at just the thought, Charlie knew he could never do it. When his father had first planned of selling his childhood home, Charlie had panicked. It was the last thing he had of his mother. Most would say it was only a house, but he needed everything he could of his mother's. He could sometimes smell her baking cinnamon bread and hear her sweet humming as she cleaned the house. If they moved, Charlie was afraid he'd lose that. The most time he had spent without contact from his mother was during her last three months of life. He had been in the garage. It was his reminder never to let that happen again. He couldn't miss out on precious time. He hoped he'd never be in that situation again, but if he did, he couldn't forget what a mistake he had made by not going to his mother for three months.

Don watched his brother closely. He could see his brother get lost in his thoughts, but not the way he did when he was having one of his brilliant moments. The look seemed familiar, but he wasn't sure exactly what his brother was thinking about. Whatever it was, it had put a frown on his face and a sadness in his eyes. Wanting to take his brother's mind off that, Don gently touched his brother's arm. "Are you okay?"

Charlie turned to his brother and saw the worry in his eyes.

"No." He smiled. "But I'll be all right."

"Charlie, you know you can talk to me. If there's something on your mind... You didn't exactly have the best day today."

"I haven't had the best year."

Don smiled. "I know, Buddy."

Charlie looked across from him at the off-white wall. There was nothing but an award he had won for some of the work he'd done during college. It was nothing really. Don hadn't even come.

"It's not getting any easier on me, Don. I can't stand how you and Dad always seem to get tossed into these situations, too. If it was just me, I would handle it better. I'd still be terrified, but it would be my life. I could deal with

getting hurt if it meant you and Dad would be okay. But with Carl, and now Jake, you two were always at risk. It scared me to death what he planned to do to you two, just to get to me. And I know that the reasons they've done it is because they want to make me suffer, which means it's my fault. Thank God Carl never actually got a chance to get to you, but do you realize how close he came? Before I..." Charlie paused, hating the word he was about to use. "Before I killed him, Carl was going to take me into the house. He knew Dad was there. I fought him off, but he grabbed me and kept twisting my arm. He wanted me to scream so Dad would hear and come out there. If I had screamed loud enough, Dad would have been there and Carl would have hurt him, maybe even killed him, in front of me. And you came shortly after, Don. You know you would have gone in there. What if he had managed to stop you, too? He could have killed you and Dad right in front of me."

Charlie began violently shaking as he worked himself up. Don grabbed onto his right forearm in a tight grip. "Buddy, calm down."

Charlie looked up at Don and the horror shown plainly in his eyes. "I could have lost you both, Donny. What would I have done then? How would I live knowing that I was the cause of the death of the two most important people in my life? How would I go on? I-I... I would have killed myself. That's the only thing I could have done. I would have killed myself." Charlie's words began to come out faster as he felt panicky again. Don put his arms around his brother and squeezed him tightly against his chest. Charlie's talk of suicide scared him. He couldn't imagine his brother taking his own life. As though that were a threat now, Don held on tighter.

"Sh. It didn't happen, Buddy... and it's not going to happen now." Don rested his chin on top of his brother's head and stared bleakly in front of him. He whispered, "I promise."

Charlie shivered. There had been promises made before, but how could anyone really know for sure? Who was he to trust someone who couldn't predict the future? There was no way Don knew that for sure because Jake was still loose. The FBI wasn't successful in catching him yet, and who knew if they would be? Charlie had faith in the people who worked for the FBI, but he wasn't sure there was anyone who could stop Jake.

"Buddy, can we talk?" Don asked as his brother moved out of his arms. He could feel Charlie's fear, as though it radiated off his body. He needed to let his brother talk about what had happened. Maybe he could get Charlie to

understand that it was not his fault that he got shot. Charlie nodded, looking suspiciously at Don. He didn't want to be lied to. He didn't want to mess around. He knew the truth. There was nothing that could change that, so he didn't want Don trying to confuse him with his version of the truth.

"It never was your fault that I got shot the other day, understand? Yes, I admit I was thinking about you when I got hit, but that doesn't mean it was your fault. I made a bad call. I'm an experienced agent. We're trained to be in a certain mindset when we're out in the field. I shouldn't have been thinking about you. It was just... still fresh in my mind."

As Charlie watched his brother talk about it, he could see there was more to it than just that. Maybe Don was lying. He wasn't sure. "What aren't you telling me?"

Don looked at Charlie quickly. How did he pick up on that? What was he going to tell him? _Oh, yeah, and Charlie, I was giving up when I got in the line of fire. It was intentional, so of course it wasn't your fault. It was mine!_ How was he supposed to tell his brother that?

"It's nothing, Buddy." Don smiled at Charlie, trying to reassure him that it was okay. He knew Charlie could see through it, but, thankfully, he left it alone.

Charlie burrowed into his mattress and laid lightly on his side to avoid any extra pain. He hugged the pillow to his cheek and stared across the room at nothing in particular. He could feel Don's eyes on him and he shivered.

Don gently placed a hand on his brother's shoulder and tilted his head so he could see Charlie's face. "Are you okay, Buddy?"

Charlie nodded, though he didn't believe it. He wanted to be okay. He was beginning to forget what that felt like. He closed his eyes, having exhausted himself once more. Don watched his brother until Charlie's breathing evened out. He smiled and stood and left his little brother's room, hoping Charlie could sleep peacefully. He hoped he had succeeded in giving his brother some comfort while he was with him. While he was relaxing in the arm chair downstairs, his calm was broken when he heard his brother cry out.

Wishing for his gun, Don made his way back up the stairs. Alan came out of his room, still wet from a shower. Don pushed forward, wanting to enter first in case they had anything else to worry about.

Charlie was tossing on his bed in the tangled mess of blankets. Don let his father get to him first and shake him awake. When Charlie's panic-filled eyes opened, he searched the room for something that wasn't there.

"He's here! Oh, God, he can see me!" Charlie struggled to hide himself by covering up in the heap of blankets. Knowing it was not enough, he ran to the bathroom and closed the door behind him, even going so far as to lock it. Don followed after him, trying the door. When he found it was locked, he looked behind him to check where his father. He began to lift his foot, but Alan stopped him with a scream.

"Donald Eppes! Don't even think about it!" He realized that his son was going to try to kick the door down, but with his son's current injuries, he knew that would be a foolish decision. Though it hurt his old body, Alan did it instead with a hard body-slam to the door. Don watched, impressed, as the door came open.

Charlie was in the bathtub, worthlessly covering himself up with water. The tub was filling up fast and he was lying face-down in the water. Realizing that his son couldn't breathe, Alan moved quickly to pull Charlie above the water.

"No! He'll see me!" Don could see that Charlie was still in the nightmare he'd been having. Hardly sure his little brother was still awake, he watched as Charlie covered up with the shower curtain.

"Charlie, stop!" Alan demanded in a stern voice, hoping his parental tone would break through to him.

"No! He'll see me. Oh, God, he can see me now! Stop looking at me!" Charlie screamed.

Don lightly nudged his father so he would make room for him by the bathtub. Charlie was sitting in the water with his eyes tightly shut. Don framed his brother's face with his hands and forced it steady.

"Charlie, look at me." Don started out speaking calmly, not sure what tone would have the best effect on his brother.

"No, no," Charlie whispered quietly. He tried to shake his head against his brother's strong hands, but he wasn't able to.

"Charlie, you need to look at me. Open your eyes."

"No!" Charlie shouted.

In response, Don yelled back. "Charlie, open your eyes!"

With a jolt, Charlie awoke. He grabbed onto the wrists that connected to the hands holding his face. Blinking several times, his eyes focused on his brother.

"Donny?"

"Yeah, it's Donny. You with me now, Buddy?"

Charlie shook all over, but managed to nod his head. Realizing he was sitting in a tub of icy cold water, he stood quickly, surprising Don. Alan steadied Don before he tipped over backwards and laid a hand on each of his sons' shoulders.

"Let's take it easy, okay?"

Don smiled at his father and nodded. He looked at his younger brother, expecting a smile there too, but he found Charlie looking all around him in paranoia. As the three exited the bathroom, Don reached out and touched Charlie's arm, only to have his brother jerk back in response.

"Sorry," Don said softly, not meaning to scare his brother. Charlie didn't respond, just turned toward his dresser drawer. He pulled out clean clothes and Don left his brother's room with the full intention of returning later.

Charlie locked the door behind his family, and not for privacy sake. He shut his curtains so those outside couldn't see him either... or at least so Jake couldn't see him. The nightmare had been all-too-real. Eyes surrounded him, yet each pair belonged to one man. Jake. No matter where he hid, the eyes followed him. He wanted to be free from them, but it was impossible... until Don's shout had brought him back to safety. The feeling of being watched didn't leave, though. He could feel eyes on him as he changed his clothes, as he laid down under the covers to ward off the chill of the icy water.

Charlie was almost asleep when the door began to slowly creak open. He fearfully looked up from the covers and soon he saw his brother's face appear around the side of the door. Sighing with relief he sat up as Don entered.

"Hey, Buddy. You okay?"

Charlie smiled and nodded. "I'm all right."

Don smiled back. "Good."

"Did you need something?" Charlie asked after an awkward pause.

"No, no. I was just checking on you." Don walked over to his brother's bed and sat by Charlie's feet.

"Oh."

Don looked from his brother to the other side of the room. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to say. Maybe he didn't have to say anything at all.

"Don?"

"Yeah, Buddy?" Don's focus returned to his brother's face.

"Could you stay here? Until I fall asleep?"

Don smiled broadly, thankful he was still able to protect his brother in some ways. "Sure thing."

Don got comfortable by positioning his back to the end of his brother's bed. They were positioned so that their feet were by each other heads and they were facing each other. Charlie smiled at his brother before laying down again and getting comfortable. Don started wishing for a beer about twenty minutes into it, though his father wouldn't let him drink any with his pain killers. Still, he was feeling awfully thirsty for one.

His brother's jerk brought Don's thoughts away from beer. He got up and moved toward his brother. "Charlie?"

"Yeah?"

Don was surprised he was awake. "Something wrong?"

"No." He pulled the cover closer to himself as he felt a chill run down his spine. He knew it wasn't Don's gaze that was bothering him. It was Jake's.

Ignoring his brother's denial, Don reached out a placed a comforting hand on his brother's arm. "It's okay, Buddy."

"I know," Charlie whispered.

"Then what are you scared of?"

Charlie paused for a long time before he spoke so quietly it was barely audible.

"Him."

Don sat down beside his brother and wrapped an arm around him. He pulled Charlie close to his side and felt him shiver again. "Stop. It's all right. Nothing's going to happen while I'm here. Okay?"

Charlie nodded as he leaned his head against Don's upper arm. He had to believe that, or he'd never sleep again. He had to know that his brother would be able to protect him. Nothing had happened when Don was around, right? He would be safe here. He would. But he still felt so afraid.

"We're all going to get through this. I promise."

Another promise. How could Don be so sure? Was he really certain that they would all get through this? Charlie hadn't been as worried when Jake kept with hurting him. But when he added his family to the mix, he was completely terrified. Why couldn't things have been different? Why couldn't Jake just leave Don and Alan alone? He'd give anything to be the only one affected by this.

"Sh," Don soothed, knowing that Charlie was exhausted, but unable to sleep. Hearing the soothing tone of his brother's voice, Charlie was able to close his eyes, and, for a moment, forget that he wasn't safe. He longed for the day where he didn't have to just forget, but just know he was okay. That day seemed like a far off dream, miles away from his reach.

**Ooh, I could have been so devilish and given you guys the worst cliffhanger ever! But lucky for you, I didn't. That just means that next chapter is going to be awesome times a million! LOL Seriously, it'll be one of the most intense chapters I've ever written. I am officially out of school, but I have graduation tomorrow and a party Saturday. But, hopefully, that won't interfere too much. I also need to talk to the great dHALL because she's gonna help me with this next chapter. It'll be AWESOME! Are you anxious yet? LOL Hopefully I can update soon! See you then and sorry if this chapter was too short. It's the calm before the storm! Bwahahahahaha!**


	20. I Don't Want Them To Know

**Okay, this is the part that I sent out. However, there have been quite a few edits. I hope to be done with the next chapter by the end of the day, or early tomorrow(Wednesday). Please read over it again because the lovely dHALL helped me with the camera info and editing it. Thanks, dHALL!**

Charlie rubbed his arm where he had just gotten his cast taken off. It had seemed so long since his arm was free. Now, his arm felt strangely light and tender. Alan had driven him to the hospital that morning to get it off and he was thankful for the use of his left arm back. He was glad when they got home that afternoon, but when they pulled up and he found several FBI vans surrounding his house, that feeling vanished.

As soon as Alan stopped the vehicle, Charlie got out. Following his son, Alan closed the door as he got out of his car. "What in the world is going on?"

Charlie searched for his brother when he entered his home. Recognizing him, the agents let Charlie come through. He wandered to the kitchen and found Don talking to several agents.

"Don!"

Seeing his brother, Don stepped away from the other agents. He walked up to Charlie and shook his head apologetically. "I'm sorry, Buddy. I was hoping we'd be done before you got back."

"What's going on? Did something else happen?" Charlie's heart thumped loudly in his chest at the thought that Jake might have returned.

"No, nothing like that. I had a team come in and sweep the house and your room for any possible links toward Jake."

"Why couldn't you just tell me that?" Charlie sighed with relief at Don's explanation.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think you'd-"

"Agent Eppes, we found something."

Both Eppes brothers turned to the agent with surprise. Before following the agent, they glanced at each other. The two then walked together up the steps and into Charlie's room. The agent was pointing out a device, which was lying on the edge of the bed.

He picked it up and brought it closer to Don and Charlie and looked at it.

"A camera?"

The agent nodded and Don asked, "What have you found out about it?"

"Wireless, USB receiver, transmittable up to almost two thousand feet."

"Traceable?"

"Possibly, if he tried to pick up the signal again.

Don smiled triumphantly. "I think you can count on it."

The agent pulled the camera away from Don and handed it to another agent.

"This particular camera isn't your standard spyware gear... not something he could pick up at Radio Shack. There are only a few outlets where you can pick up a camera this sophisticated locally. He'd have to be out of his mind to use a credit card, but it's worth a shot. In the meantime, we'll be ready the next time he tries to log on."

As Don nodded at the agent and turned to his brother, he wondered if Charlie had heard right. His eyes were wide and his breathing had become shallow. What was going on?

"You okay?" Don pulled Charlie out of his room to the top of the stairs. He caught a glimpse of his father at the bottom looking up at them. He'd have to wait.

"I... I knew something was up. I could feel eyes on me all night. That's... that's why I wanted you to stay. I felt like someone was already in there. I had a nightmare about him. He was watching me. His eyes were just... everywhere."

Don reached out and laid his hand on his brother's shoulder. "You going to be okay?"

Charlie thought for a moment, then looked up at his brother. "This means you can catch him, right?"

Don smiled. "I know it doesn't sound that reassuring, but if he tries to use the camera again, they'll be all over him in minutes."

Although the idea of Jake sitting just a few thousand feet away and watching him with that camera sent shivers down his spine, Charlie gave his brother a small smile in return. "Good."

"Yeah." Don led the way back downstairs and stopped in front of their father.

"What's going on, Donny?"

"I had a team come in a sweep the house."

"And? Did you find anything?"

Don couldn't help grinning. "Yeah, Dad. I think we've got him."

Alan sighed with relief, and a few tears filled his eyes. "Thank God."

All three Eppes men smiled at each other. Don put a hand on Charlie and Alan's shoulders. "Come on. I'll buy you guys some lunch."

It was the first step to getting back to normalcy. Charlie was thankful that it seemed like they were finally going to catch Jake.

Looking back on that later, he was sorry that they were wrong.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Charlie went back to CalSci that Monday. He made sure to drop off the gift basket to Millie for filling in for him and his classes. He had just gotten back from his first class when he got the phone call that would change everything.

"Dr. Eppes," he answered in a bright tone. He almost expected it to be Alan, but it wasn't. It was him.

"Hi, Eppes."

Charlie wished he had listened to Don by having an agent at the office with him, too.

"Don't bother getting help. When you hear what I have to say, you won't want it anyway."

"What do you want?" Charlie fought to keep his voice steady.

"You. Or your father and brother are dead."

Charlie's eyes widened in fear. "What do you need me to do?"

"Oh, so eager to see me?" Jake chuckled. "I want you to come to me. I'll give you the address. You, me, and no one else. If you're not there on time, your family gets killed. Don't think I won't do it. Did you get the pictures I sent you?"

"Y-yes."

Jake laughed at his fear. "Good. So you know I could do it. You know that I know where they go and how to get to them." He paused, as if waiting for Charlie to answer, but continued before he could. "We'll decide your fate when you get there. It'll be fun, Eppesy. And don't you dare tell the FBI. I'll know if you did, and I'll kill Don."

The fact that he spoke his brother's name so freely terrified Charlie. "I'll do whatever you want."

"Good boy." After giving Charlie the address and the time he had to be there, he hung up.

Knowing that if he didn't cooperate his family could die, Charlie knew he couldn't inform the FBI, no matter how smart a move that may be. Something inside of him told him that this was the only way. But what did he mean, they'd decide his fate? Was Jake really going to do away with him this time? He hated thinking about it. It was too distracting. But at the same time, it was reassuring to know that soon it would all be over one way or another. Trying to put the thought of Jake aside, Charlie continued with his day as normally as possible.

He still had two days before Jake wanted to see him. The details had been vague, but one thing was clear: Jake wouldn't hesitate to kill Don and Alan if Charlie didn't show up. With that information, Charlie realized that the only thing to do was obey Jake. It terrified Charlie to think about facing Jake alone. If only Don could come. But if he told Don, that could jeopardize Don and Alan's lives. It was too big of a risk for Charlie to take. So he had to face it alone, just like with Carl.

Charlie had really thought things were going to be different after Jake. The idea of being terrorized again hadn't even entered his mind. He knew that he would be haunted by Carl's spirit long after he had killed him. It was something he expected, having taken a man's life. Still, it was something he could deal with. Jake wasn't something he could handle. He was alive. He could kill him. He could kill his family. That was one thing that was good about being haunted by Carl. At least then Alan and Don were not in any danger. It was just him.

Sometimes, Charlie thought it would be better not to have a family at all. Then they would not have to face these threats. They wouldn't have to deal with Charlie's inability to protect them or himself. Don and Alan deserved better than that. But after thirty-one years with them, he couldn't just leave them behind. It was too late to change that. So, he had to handle it the way it was. He had to be the one to save them. He had to keep them alive and safe. So far he had done that. Maybe when he met with Jake...

Charlie's thoughts ended. He couldn't imagine doing it and was sure he knew how it would end. One of them would be dead. Killing Carl had not been intentional. His original plan with Carl was just to stop him. He hadn't meant to go so far. Though he hated the fact that he killed Carl, he couldn't be truly sorry. If Carl had lived, he would have found a way out of prison; he would come after him again. With Carl alive, he was still a constant threat to Charlie and his family and friends. And Charlie knew that the same went for Jake. Would he have to kill Jake?

Charlie's thoughts were broken as he was driving home when his cell phone rang.

"Hey, Buddy," his brother's voice sounded in his ear.

He felt his voice catch in his throat, but somehow he managed to speak. "Hey, Don. What's up?"

"Nothing much. I was just checking up on you."

"Everything is fine." Charlie hated how lying to his family had come easily to him. He silently promised himself to put an end to that... when this whole thing was over.

"Good. We're still working on that surveillance camera, but one of the shop owners remembers a customer that fits Jake's description."

"Great."

Don must have heard the uncertainty in his voice. "We'll get him, Buddy. This time, I know we will."

"I hope you're right."

"I am. Hey, where are you?"

"On my way home."

"Me, too. I'll see you in a few minutes, okay?"

"Okay. See you then."

Charlie hung up and turned the corner before getting on the road that led to his house. As he came up to it, he could see his father working out in the yard. Instinctively, he looked across the street to the roof of the home Jake had been perched on. Seeing it empty, he sighed with relief and drove into the driveway, sure to leave room for Don behind him.

"Hey, Charlie! How was work?"

"It was fine, Dad. Thanks."

"Good. I was thinking about making a roast tonight. Does that sound good?"

"Great, Dad."

"Oh, and I think Donny is coming over."

"Yeah, I just got off the phone with him."

"I'm glad. He's been working too hard lately."

Charlie nodded. His brother had been pushing himself to the limit with this case, since Charlie was involved. Though he wasn't allowed to work out in the field, Don still went into work again that day to do some desk work. Anything he could do to contribute, Don did. It was just like his brother to do something like that. He was completely committed to his job and each case he worked on. The hardest thing that Don dealt with was being let off a case, because he was still determined to solve the case. He couldn't let it go.

Don pulled into the driveway shortly after Charlie did. He came walking in slowly, the effects of his first strenuous day since being shot showing plainly. Alan, the ever-observant father, noticed right away.

"Donny, come sit over here. I have pillows set for you and everything."

"Aw, thanks, Dad. You didn't have to do that." Don peeled off his suit jacket slowly as he walked into the living room and toward his designated seat. He sank into the comfortable cushioned chair and sighed.

"I told you, you shouldn't have gone back today," Alan said, pointing an accusing finger at his oldest son.

"I'm fine. Stop lecturing." Don closed his eyes and leaned his head back on the back of the couch. Realizing he hadn't acknowledged his brother, a moment later he opened his eyes and looked over at his brother on the opposite end of the couch. "Hey, Buddy."

"Hi."

"You okay?" He frowned, seeing something different about his brother.

"Yeah, Don. I'm fine." The statement had brought Alan's attention away from Don and onto Charlie, for which he hated. He wasn't sure if Don had intentionally done that or not, but he wished it would stop.

"You know you do look a little pale. You're not getting sick, are you? The doctor said to watch out for that since you don't have as strong of an immune system without your spleen."

"Dad, Don, I'm fine, okay? Calm down." Charlie stood and went upstairs to his room, fearful that if he stayed he would tell Don and Alan everything.

And if he did, he was convinced that Jake would surely kill them.

Charlie went without supper that night, and later called for his brother to come see him. He wasn't sure what was going to happen, but he knew that Don was planning on going back to his apartment tomorrow. If he didn't see his brother before Wednesday, he wanted to be prepared.

"What's going on, Buddy? Everything all right?"

Charlie nodded, watching Don shut the door behind him. "I'm okay. I... I just wanted to talk to you about something."

"What's that?" Don sank down beside his brother on Charlie's bed.

"I just wanted you to know... how much I love you. Everything we went through as kids, all our differences..." Charlie paused to look in his brother's eyes. "They don't matter anymore. I love working with you now and I can't imagine us being closer. I love that. I love you."

Don's eyes moved back and forth as he searched his brother's face. Charlie's words were beginning to scare him. It was the kind of thing his mother talked about before she died. "What's wrong, Buddy? You're scaring me."

Charlie smiled softly. "I didn't mean to. I... I just got to thinking about Jake. I know you're close to catching him and all, but it got me to thinking. I could die... well, whenever. I'm not saying it's going to happen any time soon, but if it does, I want to be ready, you know? And that means I can't let you go not knowing how much I love you, and how you're the best brother in the whole world. I know that sounds corny, but-"

"It doesn't." Don smiled warmly. It actually made him feel really good.

"I never could have gotten through all this without you, Don. I hope you know that. Part of who I am is because of your help."

"Thanks, Buddy. I love you, too." Don reached out and hugged his brother tightly. Charlie relished in the hug for as long as he could, wondering if it would be the last one he would give his brother.

"Could you send Dad in here, too?" Charlie asked as Don left.

"Sure thing."

Charlie gave his father a similar speech. He had planned it while they were having dinner, knowing that he had to let them know how much they mattered to him before he would lose them.

**Thanks for reading! More to come soon!**


	21. That I'm Haunted By Your Ghost

Wednesday morning, Don got the call he had been waiting on. Before he left his apartment, Colby had called with the news that they had found another local techno-shop owner who remembered Jake. About three days ago, the fugitive had ordered a VHS camcorder, with a tripod and a standard VCR, with a thirteen-inch TV monitor. The equipment was light and although he could have walked out of the store with them, he had willingly paid extra to have the packages, and a blank tape, delivered to an address on the west side.

Don wasn't supposed to be out in the field, but he demanded that Colby give him the address. Twenty minutes later, he met up with the FBI team at the house. It was the moment he had been waiting for, so there was no way Don was going to sit at the office and wait for them to bring Jake in. He was given a bulletproof vest, but he was ordered to stay in the car. He had to watch his team go inside, as he prayed that Jake would be there.

"Clear!"

"Damn it!" Don hissed when he heard that word. He punched the seat cushion and then got out.

"I'm sorry, Don," Megan said, as Don came through the front door. "He's not here. It doesn't look like anyone has been for a while."

"That can't be. We had him!"

"I know. I guess we're back to square one."

The team then proceeded to search the house for any clues toward Jake's whereabouts. Don was the one who found the VHS tape with his name on it.

"What's that?" David asked as he came up to his boss, who had been standing still for several minutes.

"It has my name on it. Where's the TV?"

"In there." David pointed toward the back of the house. "He's got it set up on the dresser."

Don went into the bedroom and turned on the television. The VCR had been properly hooked up and the remote control was sitting on top of it. Picking up the remote, Don put the VHS tape into the unit and pressed play.

The video imaged showed the dresser that Don was standing in front of, the TV monitor and VCR just as it was now. Knowing where the camera had been sitting, Don turned to look behind him, although the camcorder was no longer there.

"Hello, Agent Eppes. I was wondering when we'd get to see each other." Jake's voice turned Don's attention back to the TV and he watched as Jake walked into the shot. "You've been chasing me for quite some time now; haven't you? Sorry I've kept you going around in circles. I have to get what I want, though, and that's your brother's dead body."

Jake laughed evilly and Don had to restrain himself from punching the TV screen. He waited for Jake to continue.

"By now it's probably too late for you to do anything. Soon, you'll be short one family member. Your brother has already agreed to meet me. I convinced him that I would kill you and your father if he didn't. But here's the secret." Jake leaned closer to the camera and cupped the side of his mouth with one hand. "I'm going to kill you anyway."

Anger flared in Don's eyes, as Jake clicked the remote in his hands and Charlie and Don appeared on the TV behind him.

"Aw, how cute! Looks like Charlie still needs big brother to help him." Jake pressed the button again and a scene of Charlie huddled in his bed, crying, appeared. "Where were you then, Superman? Look at him crying! Why weren't you there to take care of him, then? Was it because you actually believed him when he said he was okay? Oh, Eppes, you have a lot to learn."

With one more press of the button, a still image of Charlie looking completely terrified came onto the screen.

"Say goodbye to little brother, Agent Eppes. Because the next time you see him he'll be in a casket." Jake laughed and then the screen went black.

"Damn it!" Don kicked the legs of a chair, which had been sitting at the foot of the bed, and overturned it.

Megan came rushing back to see what had happened. "What is it?"

"I have to call Charlie." Don rushed past her, through the house and stepped outside to get better reception for his cell phone. He quickly dialed his brother's number. As he dreaded, it went to voice mail. Though he doubted his brother would check, he had to try.

"Buddy, it's Don..." He paused, as if expecting an answer, and the continued, his words coming out in a rush. "Please, don't do this. I know everything. I know what Jake has asked you to do. Please, don't, okay? Let us catch him. Call me and tell me where you're supposed to meet him. We caught him once before that way. Let us do it again. I don't want you to get hurt. Please, Buddy. Don't do this. Dad and I will be okay. I promise. Just... don't go."

He paused again, feeling the emotion rising up in his chest as he finished his message. "Please, Charlie. I love you so much, Buddy. I can't lose you. Call me... Bye."

Don wiped at his eyes and looked up when he heard a car take a sharp turn and then pull up almost right in front of him.

"You want to save your brother?"

"Who are you?"

"Get in the car. If you want him to live, you'd better hurry up."

Don looked behind him and saw a few agents talking through the front window. Throwing all caution to the wind, Don rounded the car and got in.

The woman pulled away from the curb and sped away. It was then that Don noticed that she had the lights like on his SUV.

"Janet Waits. I'm an undercover agent for the FBI. I've been working for Assistant Director Walt Merrick on this case since before it hit your desk."

With one hand, she flashed her badge at him, and with the other, she drove.

"What? You're an agent?" Don could hardly believe it.

"Yes."

"Why didn't Walt tell me?"

For a second she turned to him, but quickly redirected her attention back to the road. "And jeopardize my cover? No way. It was best you didn't know."

"Yeah, and I've been thinking the worst of you. What's going on? How do you know where Charlie is?"

"Because Jake told me. I've been working with him part-time and the FBI the rest. I had to work with him because..."

"What?"

"He has my son."

"Oh."

"It's going to take a while to get there. Jake really wanted to make sure no one found out."

"Where is it?"

"Just on the California-Nevada state line."

Don sank back in his seat. He should have brought his team. He should have called his father. But, he hadn't done that. It was just him and Janet Waits... and that's how it was going to be.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Charlie had left early that morning to be sure to make it there on time. Along the way, he had to pull into a gas station to refill his tank. When he saw that he had a message on his cell phone, his heart beat a little faster.

He put the phone to his ear as he filled his tank. Hearing Don's voice made Charlie's heart constrict. It wasn't the voice of a detached federal agent. It was a big brother's voice...his big brother.

Rational, genius, Dr. Charles Edward Eppes would have listened to him. He understood how stupid his actions were. He would turn back right now and tell the FBI everything, let them deal with Jake. But the voice he was listening to wasn't Dr. Eppes.

This was Charlie. And in spite of his brother's plea, Charlie worried more about his family than being rational about this. Deep down he knew what he should do, but his heart wouldn't let him take the risk. That was the difference between the two. Dr. Eppes listened to his mind. Charlie had to listen to his heart.

"Bye, Donny," Charlie said aloud, as he shut his cell phone and finished filling up. He went inside, paid for his gas, and then drove off, back to his fate.

With tears in his eyes, Charlie drove to the designated spot where he was supposed to meet Jake. He arrived fifteen minutes early and was surprised at what the house looked like. It was a huge two-story house. Judging by the houses Charlie passed along the way, it was obviously part of a ritzy neighborhood. He wasn't sure if Jake was there or not, since he didn't see another car. He hoped to be able to catch Jake by surprise. Maybe then he could have more control over the situation.

Charlie was rounding the house toward the backyard when he reached for the handgun he'd strapped to his leg under his khaki pants. Before he came back up with the gun, he was grabbed from behind in a chokehold.

"Good to see you, Eppsey. You didn't really think I was going to let you get that gun, did you?"

Jake punched him in the stomach with a harsh blow, making Charlie doubled over as the air escaped his lungs. Then, Jake bent down and grabbed the gun.

"What else you got on you?"

Jake frisked Charlie roughly, pulling out his cell phone and wallet. "You won't be needing these."

Jake put Charlie's cell phone in his pocket. It would come in handy when he went after Alan and Don.

Charlie put his hands to the ground to push himself up. Seeing the action, Jake put his foot on Charlie's back and, applying his full weight, forced him back down into the grass. Charlie fought to keep his hands and knees under him, but Jake's first blow had enervated him and he moaned in pain as Jake ground his heel into the small of his back. Jake bent down to lift him to his feet, and Charlie struggled to fight him. Jake quickly grabbed his wrists, effectively restraining his hands, so he tried to kick him.

"So you're going to be difficult, huh?" Jake released one of Charlie's arms and brought his fist down hard in the middle of Charlie abdomen. As Charlie doubled over again, Jake dragged him across the yard and onto the flagstone decking, which surrounded a large rectangular pool. At the end of the pool was a small spillover Jacuzzi, surrounded by shrubbery.

For a moment, Charlie thought they were heading for the hot tub. As he continued to try to get his feet underneath him, he quickly realized that their destination was the decorative wrought iron table and two bistro chairs, which were sitting near the spa, at the deep end of the pool.

Jake dumped him into the cushioned seat, and before Charlie could move, he quickly grabbed the pieces of rope that had been on the ground beside the chair, where he had placed them earlier. Not giving the young professor a chance to fight back again, Jake tied Charlie's left wrist to the arm of the chair.

Realizing what was happening, Charlie swung his right fist into the air, but Jake sidestepped the blow and grabbed his arm, quickly tying that wrist to the chair as well.

As Jake stepped back to admire his work, Charlie strained against the binds that held him to the chair. "Let me go!"

"Now, Charlie, that's not why I brought you here."

Continuing his struggle against the ties that held him down, Charlie lifted his eyes to his captor. "Then why did you?"

Jake smiled wickedly as he looked out across the deep, blue swimming pool. He turned back to his captive and looked him in the eye. "We'll talk about that later."

Charlie's heart began to pound in his chest. This couldn't be good. If Jake was anything like Carl, he would probably find a way to torture him. He wasn't sure he was strong enough, but Charlie was willing to withstand anything Jake did to him. He wouldn't tell Jake anything. He would die first.

At that thought, Charlie felt his heart beat faster. Was he actually going to die?

The thought had crossed his mind, but he hadn't _really_ thought _he'd_ be the one to die. He had convinced himself that he might have to kill Jake, but what if it was the other way around? What if, this time, the bad guy actually won? If he had only considered that reality for one second, he could have told his family and friends how much they meant to him, how much he loved them. He would have left a will. He would have taken action. He may have only had two days to do it, but it would have been enough. Now he didn't have the chance to say goodbye.

At that thought, tears began to burn the corners of his eyes. He blinked rapidly, not wanting his captor to see the weakness that his tears displayed.

"How close are you to your family?"

At Jake's question, Charlie felt a surge of panic. His question sounded eerily similar to something Carl would ask. "We're... we're close."

"Perfect."

"Wh-why perfect?"

"Oh, nothing."

Jake paced the decking in front of Charlie, between the chair and the swimming pool. He wanted to taunt Charlie. He wanted the suspense of what could happen next to eat at him. Quite frankly, Jake wanted to have some fun and that desire was obvious to his frightened captive.

"What are you going to do to me?"

"Well, if you're so eager to get started, why wait?" Jake smiled and rounded the chair so that he was at the back of it. He grabbed onto the back of the chair and started pushing forward.

Charlie's eyes widened when he started to move closer toward the pool. "What are you doing?" he asked, although he already knew the answer.

"There's no reason to drag this out, Charlie. I'm going to kill you."

"What?!" It wasn't like he expected a different answer, but hearing Jake say it aloud was a shock to his system. "No! Stop! Let me go! Please, I'll do anything!"

Ignoring Charlie's desperate pleas, Jake just kept pushing forward.

"Stop!" Lifting his head to project his voice, Charlie yelled out, "HELP!"

Straining to look back at Jake, he began to plead again. "I have money! I'll pay you! I can get you out of the country so you won't get caught!"

In Charlie's need to get Jake to let him go, his words had become frantic screams. "I won't press charges against you! Please, don't do this!"

He tugged at his bounds, cutting into the tender flesh on his wrists. Ignoring the pain, he kept on fighting.

Jake stopped pushing when they reached the edge of the pool. He moved in front of Charlie and smacked him upside the head. "Stop fighting it. C'mon! It's not like you didn't know this was coming."

Charlie looked fearfully into Jake's eyes. Had he seen it coming? Charlie supposed he had, but he hadn't wanted to believe it. He was still young. He hadn't finished his greatest work. He never got married, didn't have any kids... there were still so many things he wanted to do. But Jake had told him that this would end it between them. Unable to keep his thoughts to himself, Charlie spoke aloud.

"At least... at least you promised that my family will be safe." Charlie couldn't hide the tears in his eyes this time. He would miss them so much.

Jake smiled and moved behind the chair once more. He leaned forward so that he was by Charlie's ear. "Here's my secret, Eppes. I wouldn't want you to die not knowing this."

He paused dramatically before he said in a low whisper, "I lied."

"No!" Charlie shouted, as Jake gave one final shove.

As the chair splashed into the pool, Charlie got a mouthful of water first thing. However, since there was a cushion on the chair, he was able to stay afloat for a few moments longer. He spat out the water and inhaled deeply before he slowly began to sink into the pool.

Charlie looked up at the light blue ceiling of the pool. The sun shone brightly on the water, giving it a beautiful sky-blue color. Through the water, he could see Jake at the edge of the pool, laughing at him.

"Let's see you get out of this one, Eppes!" Jake shouted, cupping his hands so he would be heard.

But, Charlie barely heard Jake's shout over the sound of his own heartbeat. With a slow thump, the chair hit the bottom. With the strength he still had, Charlie fought to loosen the ropes around his wrists. His lungs demanded air, and his chest heaved as he fought not to open his mouth and exhale. He pulled and tugged at the ropes that bound him. He even tried jerking forward to move the chair, but it was too heavy. Realizing he couldn't hold his breath much longer, he continued to tug at the binds that held him to the chair.

Meanwhile, Jake was laughing at his victory. Looking down in the clear, blue water, he noticed that Charlie was still trying to get free. He was certain that Charlie wouldn't be successful. However, he wanted to be sure that he wouldn't. He walked over to the pool-house where there was a switch to activate the pool cover. He turned it on and walked back to the water's edge to see the look on Charlie's face as the cover locked him in.

The electrical hum of the motor, which pulled the garage door-like cover across the top of the pool, drew Charlie's attention to the surface again. He watched in horror as the pool cover came over him and the water.

It was as if he had been struck in the face, and it was as he could do not to gasp. There was no point trying to get free. It was final. He was going to die.

Jake laughed. Charlie's reaction didn't disappoint. Before the cover moved over Charlie's position at the bottom of the pool, Jake called down to him. "Bye, Eppes!"

Part of him wanted to stay and watch, but Jake chuckled and turned around. He needed to move on to his next project: Justin Waits. He had promised Janet he wouldn't kill him if she helped him. What did she take him for? A good person? He walked toward the house, where Justin was locked up, trying to decide how to kill him. Maybe he would open the pool back up and let the boy see what he had done to the professor. Having used that method to kill Charlie, he could see going another round with Justin.

However, he hadn't gone far when he was grabbed from behind. A gun was shoved into the side of his head.

"Give it up, Jake," Don Eppes said to him.

"Ah, big brother made it. How fun. Now you can watch him drown with me."

Realizing the implications of Jake's words, Don turned his head toward the pool. Taking advantage of the agent's distraction, Jake drilled his elbow into the agents stomach and Don fell back onto the pool cover. The agent lost his gun as he fell, so Jake dove for it. The weapon lay close to the fallen agent, so he had to be fast if he was going to win this round.

Don sucked in a breath, quickly realizing that he had fully broken the ribs that had been injured when he was shot. But as soon as Jake moved for his gun, he forced himself to react and he turned on his side and grabbed the gun.

Charlie had stopped struggling as he stared up at the shadowed bodies on the pool cover. Without realizing he was doing it, he began to slowly exhale the spent oxygen that was burning in his lungs and the bubbles of air were slowly rising to the surface of the water.

He wasn't sure who those men were, but he felt badly for the one that had fallen onto the thick, vinyl pool cover. Over the bubbles that were being released from his mouth, Charlie watched as the second form lunged for something and the one laying on the cover picked something up.

Charlie's ears had filled with a strange humming sound, and as he watched the show above him, he wanted to open his mouth and hum along to the sounds. He knew he was supposed to be holding his breath, but for the life of him, he could not remember why. As the sound in his ears changed to a roaring hum, Charlie heard two shots ring out. He immediately recognized the sound, in spite of the false euphoria brought on by lack of oxygen, and he was certain that someone was shooting at him. He supposed Jake had decided to finish the job the old fashioned way. Deciding there was no reason to continue holding his breath, Charlie opened his mouth and released the pins and needles that filled his lungs and throat.

Don was shocked at the steadiness of the gun in his hand. His reflex had been instantaneous. It had been obvious that Jake was going to kill him, so he had to do it. After a staggering moment, rather like a bad death scene in a movie, Jake fell dramatically onto the pool cover beside him. Not taking another moment to think about it, Don pushed himself up. Through the cover, he could see a chair at the bottom of the pool and tied to it was... Charlie.

"Janet! Get the pool cover!"

The other agent appeared from the other side of the house and went into the pool house, reactivating the motor to retract the pool cover. It only took seconds for the edge of the cover to move back enough for him to slip through, but to Don, it seemed to take forever. As he slid into the water, he kicked hard against the side of the pool and swam for the bottom. He could see a mass of wet curls floating around the head of the body and as he approached, his brother's face appeared amid the black tresses. His eyes were open, but there was nothing there and Don knew that he was too late. Charlie was dead.

He grabbed onto his brother's upper arms and was thankful that with three tugs, Charlie came free. Swimming to the top, Don pushed Charlie's body over the side of the pool and then struggled to bring himself up. Janet ran toward him and pulled him up by the arm. Don's ribs were aching and it was quickly becoming very hard to breathe.

Ignoring the physical pain that was burning his side, Don focused on the surge of rage at the idea that Jake had actually managed to take Charlie away from him.

"Move!" Don pushed Janet out of his way and knelt down next to this brother.

"Oh, God," he hissed as he checked for a pulse, and found none. Quickly he began chest compressions on his brother.

"Come on, Charlie."

In between his efforts to breathe life-giving oxygen into his brother's lungs, Don began to plead with him. "Don't die on me now. You can't leave me like this."

They had been through so much together. And Charlie had been put through hell and back. How could he not make it to the end? This couldn't be it. This couldn't be the way the story ended. Don couldn't be alone after all this. Charlie was strong. He would make it... but he wasn't breathing.

The image of his brother underneath him began to blur. "No!" Don cried, thinking that Charlie was slowly fading away from him. However, it was only because of the tears that filled his eyes that Charlie looked so blurred.

"Don, stop." Janet had been standing over him, watching as he tried to return life to his brother's limp body.

"No! I... I have to do this. He can't die. Buddy, you can't leave me here. Please."

Janet's common sense told her they were too late, but seeing the man in front of her as he began to fall apart prompted her to kneel on the other side of the younger man's body.

"Let me, Don."

With a gentle push, Janet moved Don out of the way and continued administering CPR to Charlie. Don grabbed onto his brother's hand with both of his and brought it to his chest, allowing the woman to take over. With each set of compressions and breaths, Janet's motions became less enthusiastic and Don realized that she was not going to keep it up forever. At some point, very soon, they would have to stop trying.

"Please, Charlie," he begged as Janet leaned over his brother's face to breathe air into his lungs.

Suddenly, Charlie's body writhed on the flagstone and a deep gurgling sound emitted from his throat. Janet moved back as the water began to come up out of Charlie's mouth, then suddenly, he turned his head and heaved as a large gush of water spilled from between his lips. He tried to inhale, which caused a massive coughing fit and Charlie instinctively brought his knees up as he began to heave. Then, he continued to cough for several minutes as he spat the remaining water from his insides.

Don, startled, watched as his brother returned to life before his eyes. When Charlie finally stopped heaving and coughing, he flopped onto his back again, his eyes closed.

"Charlie?"

When he got no response, Don bent forward and rested his head on his brother's chest. He could hear a weak, but steady heartbeat. And he could hear him breathing. For several seconds, he remained in that position, listening to his brother as he breathed.

A whispered voice broke the silence. "Took you... long enough."

Don chuckled and lifted his head, making no effort to hide the tears that were streaming down his face. "I love you, Buddy. I love you so much."

**Oh... my... gosh. It's sooooo late. I'm tired. My neck is killing me. My foot's asleep. It's 2 o'clock in the morning. I want to be in bed. But, dedicated author that I am, I stayed up this late just to post. I got the edited version from dHALL around 1 o'clock and it took me this long to get it up. I'm expecting lots of reviews and praise because I think I deserve it. Maybe I'm just being cranky because it's late, but don't I at least deserve that? Plus I hold power over your beloved Don, Alan, and Charlie. Wouldn't want anything to happen to them, would you? No, I won't but make this worth while, okay?**

**Thank you again to the awesome dHALL. Without her, this chapter wouldn't be nearly as good. However, this was all my idea, she just helped give it depth and details. Okay, and a lot more, but the main storyline of this chapter is mine. LOL Thanks again!**


	22. So I Take It All On Myself

**NOTE: UPDATES HAVE BEEN MADE! READ AWAY!**

Don rested his head again on his brother's chest, relishing in the sound of Charlie's steady heartbeat and the feel of his rib cage rising and falling with each breath. It was a miracle. He had been so sure that he had lost him. But, he was here and he was alive. Charlie was alive

Charlie reached up and touched his brother's head. He was so glad he had made it in time. He had been afraid that he would never get the chance to see his family again. Though he loved his mother, it wasn't time to see her again. Not yet. He still had his brother and father... and he loved them so much.

Don sat up, obviously in pain from the injury to his ribs. Charlie looked up at him from his spot on the ground. Realizing for the first time that he didn't see Jake, a surge of panic rushed through him and he looked around anxiously. With a surge of adrenaline, he scrambled backward, searching the area around him, expecting Jake's attack on him at any moment.

"J-Jake," he whispered fearfully.

Don saw the terror on his brother's face and moved in front of Charlie, putting his hands on both of his shoulders. "It's okay, Buddy. He's not going to hurt you."

Charlie's eyes found the body that had been atop the pool cover, now moved to the shallow end of the pool. The water around the body had turned a light shade of red as the blood dispersed from the body of Jake Daniels.

"Oh, God." Charlie tried to stand up, but was unable to get to his feet and nearly doubled over. Not only had the emotional impact of everything that had happened suddenly slammed into him, but he then became aware of the aching pain in his chest caused by the desperate attempt to restart his heart. Don sat back down so that he was shoulder-to-shoulder with his brother. He put an arm around Charlie and squeezed him tightly.

"You're okay, Buddy. It's over now."

Charlie peeked up at his brother and he could see in Don's eyes that he was the one who had done it. Don had saved him. He had done what had to be done and he had saved his life. Gratitude and sympathy washed over him. "You?"

Don understood what his brother meant and he nodded. "Yeah..."

Charlie put his head back down, but leaned into his brother. He was grateful beyond words that Don had succeeded in protecting him. Don was always the one to come through for him.

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Janet had left Eppes brothers by the pool to search for her son. _"Please, be here,"_ she silently prayed. If he wasn't in this house, they may never know where he was because Jake was dead.

She ran inside the house and went through the first floor without finding him. She rushed upstairs and found him in one of the bathrooms, tied to the shower head. Dried blood covered both of his arms near his bound wrists and down closer to his biceps where Jake had deliberately cut him.

"Oh, Justin!"

Janet hurriedly tore off the rope that held Justin up. She tried to catch him when he came down, so not to hurt him anymore. She put her arms under his and around so that her hands were on his shoulders. Gently, she brought him down to the bottom of the bathtub. Moaning fearfully, Justin twitched a little.

"Shhh, baby. It's Mama. You're okay now."

Slowly Justin peeled his eyes open and looked at his mother's face. "Mama?"

"Yes, sweetie. It's Mama. You're going to be just fine now, okay?"

"I'm tired."

"Yes, I know. Rest now, baby. You'll feel better soon."

As Justin drifted off into a delirium brought on by exhaustion and blood loss,, Janet stood from the bottom of the tub and ran outside, hoping the ambulance had arrived. They weren't there yet, so she ran up to Don and Charlie where they were sitting together at the edge of the pool, staring at Jake's body.

"Please, Don, send the paramedics inside, Don. My son is hurt."

"Justin?"

Janet nodded, and felt her lower lip tremble.

"How bad is he, Janet?"

This time a few tears managed to spill from the corners of her eyes. "He's been cut and beaten. Who knows what Jake did to him?"

She turned and started back to the house. However, she had only gone a few steps when she felt a gentle hand land on her shoulder.

"It'll be okay." Don had gotten to his feet and had made it to her side in seconds. "It's over now."

His eyes searched hers and she felt a genuine smile of relief lift the corners of her mouth, in spite of her fear for her son.

"Thank you. I know. It's just..."

"Scary." Don looked over his shoulder at his brother. He knew exactly what that was like.

"Yes. Scary. I need to get back to him."

Don nodded and turned around, walking back to Charlie. Janet had hoped that when everything was said and done that he would understand. She only hoped that Justin would as well.

When she got back to him, Justin was lying in the fetal position in the bathtub when Janet came back to him. She leaned over the edge and brushed his matted hair away from his face. She noticed the heat in her son's forehead and knew he had a fever. Janet prayed that her son would make it through. She couldn't lose another loved one.

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Though the weather was warm, Charlie shivered as he waited on the ambulance to arrive. Completely soaked, water dripped off his curly hair. He twisted his t-shirt and watched the water spill around him. Don, equally wet, didn't feel the cold as badly as his brother did.

"You okay, Buddy?"

Charlie nodded. "I think so. Chest hurts." He folded his arms around his body and began rocking back and forth.

"Yeah. It'll be okay." Don moved his hand back and forth across Charlie's back to help give him some warmth.

Before long, the ambulance arrived. Don stood quickly in spite of the pain from his own injuries, and directed some of the paramedics inside and followed the others to his brother. He watched them lay him on a gurney and pick him up and put him in the ambulance. Following along, he got in beside his brother. With barely enough room, the others brought in Justin on a gurney. He was unconscious and moaning. Don hadn't known what to expect and when he saw the young man, he wasn't prepared for the sight of him. Justin had blood all around his arms, which the paramedics were quickly swiping away with an alcohol wipe. The wounds began to bleed again and the paramedics quickly wrapped them in gauze. It was obvious that they would later need stitches. Don had to look away when he saw Justin's face squeeze in pain.

Janet hadn't been able to fit in the ambulance, but she was driving close behind. He just hoped the boy didn't come to and ask for his mother.

Charlie looked up at Don, worry etched across his face. "Is that Justin?"

Don nodded solemnly. "Yeah."

Charlie tilted his head up and looked over at the younger man. "Is he going to be okay?"

"I don't know, Buddy. I don't know."

Don gripped Charlie's arm under the blanket in a protective hold. The cuts around Charlie's wrists from where he had struggled against the ropes were minor, but they still bled a little. The paramedics were able to treat his external injuries quickly, and soon they reached the hospital.

When Don wasn't able to come back with him, Charlie felt fearful about being alone. "Donny!"

Don moved alongside the gurney and grabbed his brother's fingers. "It's okay, Buddy. They need to take care of you. I'll be right out here. Don't worry."

"Don-"

"You're okay. I promise. No one's going to hurt you."

Charlie nodded, fear still in his eyes.

Don smiled proudly at him. "I'll see you later, Buddy. Okay?"

Charlie watched until he couldn't see Don anymore. He hoped Don was right, but there was still a persistent feeling that Jake could come get him.

"Sir?" A nurse came up to Don, and reached out, grabbing his arm. "If you need to see a doctor, I've got an empty exam room. Otherwise, I need you to wait in the lobby."

He turned and looked at her. "I guess it would be a good idea. My ribs..."

"We'll get you fixed up right away. " She started down the hall without waiting for him to finish. "Is there anyone you'd like us to call for you and your brother?"

"Oh, shit," Don hissed. His father had no idea what was going on, but by now was probably worried sick.

"Sir?" The nurse looked impatient as she turned back toward him.

"My father. I need to call my father."

Without waiting for her permission, Don took out his cell phone and quickly dialed his father's number. Alan answered on the first ring.

"Donny?" Even without caller ID, Alan knew that it was his son.

"Yeah, Dad. It's me."

"What's going on?"

"Charlie and I are at the hospital."

"What? What happened?"

"Jake attacked Charlie..." Don paused as he thought about what an understatement that was. He shivered at the thought of how close he had come to losing him forever.

"Did you get him?"

Don waited before he answered. "Yeah, Dad... I got him."

Understanding what that meant, Alan sighed. "Thank God. What hospital are you at? I'm coming."

Forgetting they were in Nevada, Don looked at the nurse. "What hospital is this?"

Alan heard the nurses' answer and shouted out, "NEVADA?" before Don could repeat the name of the hospital.

"Dad, it's okay. We'll be fine until you get here. I need to go, Dad. The nurse is waiting for me, okay?"

"For you? Why? Donny are you hurt?" Alan didn't give him time to answer before he continued in a rush. "Why in the world are you talking to me then? Get off the phone and get treated, mister!"

Don chuckled, in spite of the pain in his side. "Okay, Dad. I'll see you later."

"Take care of Charlie."

"I will."

"Bye."

Don hung up and followed the nurse a few steps. But, another disruption stopped him he caught sight of Janet running through the doors out of the corner of his eye. He stopped. "Hold on a sec."

Don left the nurse, who, annoyed, rolled her eyes. He went toward Janet and she met him half way.

"How's Justin? Is he all right?"

"He's okay. They took him back right away."

Janet nodded, breathing deeply. "What about you? I noticed your sides hurting you."

Don smiled and looked over at the nurse and back at Janet. "Well, I'm on my way to get checked out."

"Oh. Well, you'd better get." Janet managed a small smile and Don nodded.

"It'll be okay."

"Thanks. Go take care of yourself."

"I will."

Don hurried back to the nurse and finally went back. When he had his ribs taped and was free to go, he went out in the waiting room and sat by Janet. She barely acknowledged his presence beside her, but she looked up when Don began to speak.

"I owe you... so much." Don cleared his throat as emotions overtook him. "I...You helped me save Charlie. I... I had written you off as this awful person who was working with Jake to kill Charlie. I never would have imagined that when I really needed someone, you would be the one there for me. I was too emotional to save Charlie. I tried, but I was beginning to lose it. I just had it in my head that I was too late. Then you stepped in and took over CPR for me. You were the one who brought him back. I... I don't know how I can ever repay you for that."

Janet smiled warmly at the younger man beside her, touched by the truths he had told her. She could see that Don Eppes was not a man who spoke his feelings often.

"You know, you were partially right about me. I was working with Jake, but never in a way that put Charlie in danger. When Justin was first taken, I went back to my old job with the FBI. You see, I'm a retired undercover agent. I knew there was no way I could sit back and wait for someone to find Justin and bring him home to me. I knew what Jake was capable of. So I called my old partner, Assistant Director Walt Merrick, and he got me in as an undercover agent. Jake had already contacted me, so I didn't need to worry too much about my cover being blown. He never knew I was an agent, since I had never told my family. I stopped shortly after I got married, when I was pregnant with Todd. For my safety and theirs, I never told my children what I did. But I worked with Jake, and I told him things about Charlie, but never anything to risk his safety, though Jake wanted me to.

"Don, it's obvious that you're a wonderful young man. I can't ask you for anything, because there's nothing I need. I just need my son, and that's all."

Silence loomed over for a few moments as they looked at each other. Don's eyes watered over, and he did nothing to hide it this time.

"Thank you."

Janet smiled and patted Don's hand. "That's enough for me, just a thank you."

For a moment Don felt like a loved one of someone he saved while working for the FBI. Thank you felt so insignificant, but there were no other words to say that could come close to enough. He could never pay her back something equal to the importance his brother was to him. Nothing was enough. So all he could say was "thank you."

With surprising speed, Alan arrived at the hospital. Don stood when he saw his father walk through the sliding doors. Alan spotted him and hurried over to his oldest son.

"Dad, what are you doing here already?"

"Megan. She called in a helicopter for me."

Don shook his head. She was something else.

"What happened? Where's Charlie?"

"He's still back there." Don turned his head when a doctor walked in, but he went to Janet.

Alan took no notice of the woman, not yet knowing the connection between her and his sons.

"Is he going to be okay?"

"Yeah, I think so." The flicker of pain in Don's eyes showed Alan something awful had happened.

"Are you okay?"

Just that question was enough to set Don off. When Alan saw the glazing of tears in Don's eyes, he quickly brought his son tightly in his arms. Don held onto his father, needing him to remain standing.

"It's okay now, Donny. Everything is going to be all right now." Though Alan wasn't sure what happened, he knew that Don needed to hear those words. He hoped that his sons were okay, that it was all finally over. But he still worried about the aftereffects... Sometimes they were the hardest things to deal with.

When the doctor left Janet, she sat for a moment, completely stoic. Then, without warning, she burst into tears. Doubling over, she covered her face with her hands and sobbed into them.

Alan looked at her and then turned back to Don.

"Donny, do you know that woman?"

Don wiped his eyes and turned to Janet. He frowned in concern when he saw her crying. He walked over to her and sat down beside her. "Janet?"

With a shaky breath, Janet sat up. "Justin has internal bleeding. They need to operate. They don't know how extensive it is yet."

"I'm sorry."

Janet nodded, shutting her mouth to keep the sobs inside.

"Anyone here for Charles Eppes?" a doctor asked when he stepped out into the waiting room.

With one last glance at Janet, Don stood and came to the doctor, with Alan at his heels.

"I'm Don Eppes, Charlie's brother. This is our father Alan."

"It's nice to meet you. I'm Dr. Keith Anderson."

"How's Charlie?"

"He's going to be fine. Your son is very lucky to be alive."

Alan nodded in agreement and glanced appreciatively at his eldest son. As the doctor continued, though, Alan's expression fell.

"Since Charlie did experience cardiac arrest, we'd like to keep him for observation."

Alan sat down hard at the news that his son's heart had stopped. Putting his hand on his father's shoulder in a protective gesture, Don nodded at the doctor and asked, "How long?"

"Maybe a few days." Giving them an encouraging smile, the doctor sat down across from Alan. "Neurologically, there doesn't seem to be any lasting effects. However, there can be respiratory or cardiologic complications that we may not see right away."

Alan nodded and the doctor continued. "Understand that pneumonia is an uncommon development in pool aspirations, since the water is chemically treated, but we're going to go ahead and start him on a round of IV antibiotics, just to be safe."

"What about his chest?"

They both looked up at Don, who looked guiltily at them both. "I was in a panic when I started CPR and..."

"Nothing was broken." Again, the doctor smiled reassuringly. "You're be surprised how flexible the ribcage can be. Charlie is going to be very sore, but it's better than the alternative. Like I said, he's a very lucky young man."

Once Dr. Anderson told them they could go back to see Charlie, Alan and Don quickly went down the hall to Charlie's room. He would have to stay for observation for a couple nights. Don knew that meant they would have to get a hotel somewhere. He might have to drive back to LA for work, but he figured he could get some time off. He would just have to give someone his statement about what happened.

When they entered Charlie's room, they found him to be abnormally solemn. He barely smiled when they came in and he didn't say anything until someone talked to him first.

"How are you feeling?"

"Okay."

"Do you need anything?"

"No."

"Do you want something?"

"No."

"Are you tired?"

"Kinda."

And on it went. Don finally looked at his father and nodded toward the door. After giving Charlie a hug, he walked into the hall with Don.

"What?" Alan asked, somewhat irritated.

"Let me talk to him."

"And get one-word answers? What good is that going to do?"

"Please. We're going to need a hotel room anyway. Go, find us some place to stay, and call me. Please, Dad."

Alan looked into Charlie's room. His son didn't even look up when he opened the door. He just stared at his blanketed feet with a defeated look on his face. Alan shut the door and sighed.

"All right. I'll go get us a place. But I'm coming right back, you hear?"

Don smiled. "Thank you."

Alan gave him a small hug and then walked away. Don watched his father go a moment, and then walked into Charlie's room.

"Hey, Buddy."

Charlie looked up at his older brother, but didn't give a response. He trailed Don's movements with his eyes.

Don sat down on the chair beside Charlie's bed. He leaned forward and propped his elbows on his knees, placing his chin in his hands. He looked at his little brother and sighed.

"What's wrong?"

Charlie shrugged.

"Come on, Buddy. That's not doing me any good. I need something more than movements and one-word answers. Talk to me."

Charlie turned away, afraid of his own emotions. His brother wouldn't understand. He couldn't. It had been so terrifying, trapped underwater. He wanted to fight so hard, but he couldn't do anything. He wanted to cry for help, but there was no air. No one would have heard him. What if they hadn't known where to look? Who knew how long it would have been before they found his body under water? He would have died all alone, without the chance to tell everyone he loved how he truly felt. Charlie could have told secrets he'd kept from his family. He could have told Amita he loved her. He would have told all his friends he loved them. And Don and Alan... He didn't know how he could honestly convey just how much he loved them. But he would have tried.

Jake had come so close to winning. And he had told him that he was going after Don and Alan next. Just that thought kept his heart racing. What if he had gotten away? Charlie's tears spilled onto his cheeks as he thought about his family having to live with the same fear and torture he had.

"Buddy? Come on, Charlie. What's wrong?" Don stood and rounded the bed so that he was in Charlie's line of vision. He bent so that he was level with his brother's eyes. He saw the tears and knew his brother was dealing with a lot at once.

"Talk to me, Buddy."

Charlie bent his head and a tear slipped off his chin. He mumbled something and Don leaned forward. "What did you say?"

Charlie lifted his head and looked his brother in the eye. "I said, 'I almost died.'"

When a sob escaped his lips, Charlie turned away from Don again and pressed his face in the pillow, allowing the tears to come freely. He clutched the blanket in his hand and brought it to his face, wiping at the stream of tears trailing down his face.

"Oh, Buddy." Don stood and sat on the bed beside Charlie. He pulled his brother into a hug and Charlie turned into him. He squeezed his big brother around the waist tightly, needing someone to hold him steady. He cried into his brother's shirt, letting Don hold him as he let out all his emotions in the form of tears.

Don understood how his brother was feeling, whether Charlie believed it or not. He had come close to dying before, and it was the worst feeling in the world. On top of the torture Charlie had been through, his brother was an absolute mess. And who could blame him? He'd been put through hell and back. It was amazing that he'd held up this long. His brother needed time to get better, to recover from all he had been through. With him and Alan there every step of the way, Don was sure his brother would be okay... It just might take a while to get there.

**Hey, guys! Sorry it took a while to write again. I've been kinda lazy, but I thought it would be okay since I gave you two long chapters last week. LOL Sorry about that. And, THANK YOU ALL for my wonderful reviews. You didn't disappoint. It was well worth the work. Thanks for sticking with me so long! It still has a few chapters to it. So hang around!**

**IT HAS BEEN UPDATED!!!! THANK YOU DHALL! YOU'RE THE BEST!**


	23. And Fight Away The Fear

**In case you guys didn't read the extra scene in the last chapter that I added later, here it is. I italicized is, so if you have already read it, just move on to the part that isn't italicized! Thanks to dHALL for the dream idea!**

_When the doctor left Janet, she sat for a moment, completely stoic. Then, without warning, she burst into tears. Doubling over, she covered her face with her hands and sobbed into them._

_Alan looked at her and then turned back to Don._

_"Donny, do you know that woman?"_

_Don wiped his eyes and turned to Janet. He frowned in concern when he saw her crying. He walked over to her and sat down beside her. "Janet?"_

_With a shaky breath, Janet sat up. "Justin has internal bleeding. They need to operate. They don't know how extensive it is yet."_

_"I'm sorry."_

_Janet nodded, shutting her mouth to keep the sobs inside._

_"Anyone here for Charles Eppes?" a doctor asked when he stepped out into the waiting room._

_With one last glance at Janet, Don stood and came to the doctor, with Alan at his heels._

_"I'm Don Eppes, Charlie's brother. This is our father Alan."_

_"It's nice to meet you. I'm Dr. Keith Anderson."_

_"How's Charlie?"_

_"He's going to be fine. Your son is very lucky to be alive."_

_Alan nodded in agreement and glanced appreciatively at his eldest son. As the doctor continued, though, Alan's expression fell._

_"Since Charlie did experience cardiac arrest, we'd like to keep him for observation."_

_Alan sat down hard at the news that his son's heart had stopped. Putting his hand on his father's shoulder in a protective gesture, Don nodded at the doctor and asked, "How long?"_

_"Maybe a few days." Giving them an encouraging smile, the doctor sat down across from Alan. "Neurologically, there doesn't seem to be any lasting effects. However, there can be respiratory or cardiologic complications that we may not see right away."_

_Alan nodded and the doctor continued. "Understand that pneumonia is an uncommon development in pool aspirations, since the water is chemically treated, but we're going to go ahead and start him on a round of IV antibiotics, just to be safe."_

_"What about his chest?"_

_They both looked up at Don, who looked guiltily at them both. "I was in a panic when I started CPR and..."_

_"Nothing was broken." Again, the doctor smiled reassuringly. "You're be surprised how flexible the ribcage can be. Charlie is going to be very sore, but it's better than the alternative. Like I said, he's a very lucky young man."_

_Once Dr. Anderson told them they could go back to see Charlie, Alan and Don quickly went down the hall to Charlie's room. He would have to stay for observation for a couple nights. Don knew that meant they would have to get a hotel somewhere. He might have to drive back to LA for work, but he figured he could get some time off. He would just have to give someone his statement about what happened._

_When they entered Charlie's room, they found him to be abnormally solemn. He barely smiled when they came in and he didn't say anything until someone talked to him first._

_"How are you feeling?"_

_"Okay."_

_"Do you need anything?"_

_"No."_

_"Do you want something?"_

_"No."_

_"Are you tired?"_

_"Kinda."_

_And on it went. Don finally looked at his father and nodded toward the door. After giving Charlie a hug, he walked into the hall with Don._

_"What?" Alan asked, somewhat irritated._

_"Let me talk to him."_

_"And get one-word answers? What good is that going to do?"_

_"Please. We're going to need a hotel room anyway. Go, find us some place to stay, and call me. Please, Dad."_

_Alan looked into Charlie's room. His son didn't even look up when he opened the door. He just stared at his blanketed feet with a defeated look on his face. Alan shut the door and sighed._

_"All right. I'll go get us a place. But I'm coming right back, you hear?"_

_Don smiled. "Thank you."_

_Alan gave him a small hug and then walked away. Don watched his father go a moment, and then walked into Charlie's room._

_"Hey, Buddy."_

_Charlie looked up at his older brother, but didn't give a response. He trailed Don's movements with his eyes._

_Don sat down on the chair beside Charlie's bed. He leaned forward and propped his elbows on his knees, placing his chin in his hands. He looked at his little brother and sighed._

_"What's wrong?"_

_Charlie shrugged._

_"Come on, Buddy. That's not doing me any good. I need something more than movements and one-word answers. Talk to me."_

_Charlie turned away, afraid of his own emotions. His brother wouldn't understand. He couldn't. It had been so terrifying, trapped underwater. He wanted to fight so hard, but he couldn't do anything. He wanted to cry for help, but there was no air. No one would have heard him. What if they hadn't known where to look? Who knew how long it would have been before they found his body under water? He would have died all alone, without the chance to tell everyone he loved how he truly felt. Charlie could have told secrets he'd kept from his family. He could have told Amita he loved her. He would have told all his friends he loved them. And Don and Alan... He didn't know how he could honestly convey just how much he loved them. But he would have tried._

_Jake had come so close to winning. And he had told him that he was going after Don and Alan next. Just that thought kept his heart racing. What if he had gotten away? Charlie's tears spilled onto his cheeks as he thought about his family having to live with the same fear and torture he had._

_"Buddy? Come on, Charlie. What's wrong?" Don stood and rounded the bed so that he was in Charlie's line of vision. He bent so that he was level with his brother's eyes. He saw the tears and knew his brother was dealing with a lot at once._

_"Talk to me, Buddy."_

_Charlie bent his head and a tear slipped off his chin. He mumbled something and Don leaned forward. "What did you say?"_

_Charlie lifted his head and looked his brother in the eye. "I said, 'I almost died.'"_

_When a sob escaped his lips, Charlie turned away from Don again and pressed his face in the pillow, allowing the tears to come freely. He clutched the blanket in his hand and brought it to his face, wiping at the stream of tears trailing down his face._

_"Oh, Buddy." Don stood and sat on the bed beside Charlie. He pulled his brother into a hug and Charlie turned into him. He squeezed his big brother around the waist tightly, needing someone to hold him steady. He cried into his brother's shirt, letting Don hold him as he let out all his emotions in the form of tears._

_Don understood how his brother was feeling, whether Charlie believed it or not. He had come close to dying before, and it was the worst feeling in the world. On top of the torture Charlie had been through, his brother was an absolute mess. And who could blame him? He'd been put through hell and back. It was amazing that he'd held up this long. His brother needed time to get better, to recover from all he had been through. With him and Alan there every step of the way, Don was sure his brother would be okay... It just might take a while to get there._

Don had just gotten back from picking up supplies for him and his father when he arrived at an empty hotel room. He was confused because Alan wasn't there. His father didn't have a car, since he had just gone to rent it. Figuring his dad had just gotten a taxi to the hospital, Don put the groceries away and then left the hotel once more to go to the hospital.

When Don got off the elevator and went to his brother's hospital room, neither Alan or Charlie were in the room. He assumed he had just forgotten his brother's room number, or they had moved him for some reason. So Don went to the nurses' station to ask for Charlie's room number. A look crossed the nurse's face.

"I'll get Dr. Anderson so he can talk to you."

Confused, Don waited for the doctor to arrive. When he saw Dr. Anderson's grim face, he felt his heart stop.

"Dr. Anderson, what's going on?" Don asked when they were in Dr. Anderson's office.

"I'm so sorry, Agent. Eppes. I thought someone would have told you."

"Tell me what?"

"There were... complications. Your brother contracted a severe case of pneumonia. We... we tried everything we could but... he didn't make it."

Don's heart pounded in his ears. Maybe he hadn't heard him right. "What did you say?"

"I'm sorry, Agent Eppes. Your brother died two days ago."

"B-but, I was just here a few hours ago!"

"Not to my knowledge. Your father was quite upset. You haven't been here for three days."

"No! This can't be happening!"

Don turned and ran away. He ran outside to his rented car and somehow wound up at the cemetery where his mother was buried. Beside her gravestone was a new grave. The marker read the words, "Charles Edward Eppes."

"NO!" Don screamed, crashing down beside the two gravestones. This was not supposed to happen. He had come so close to losing Charlie just days before. It couldn't be happening now. It was supposed to be all right now. The worst was over. Why was this happening?

Don cried out in pain as his heart was torn in two, as if someone was playing tug-of-war with it. He buried his face in his hands and allowed a river of tears to pour from his eyes. He had lost his brother. He hadn't even had a chance to say goodbye. He even missed Charlie's funeral. It couldn't be happening!

"Charlie. No. Oh, God, Buddy, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen. Please, please, forgive me." Crawling on his hands and knees, Don moved over Charlie's grave and laid down on top of the loose dirt. He spread his arms out, like he was hugging the ground.

"I'm s-s-sorry, Charlie. I'm so, so sorry," Don cried brokenly. He had failed him. He had failed his brother. How could he have let this happen?

When a warm hand clasped his shoulder, Don ignored it. It didn't matter. Charlie was dead. Nothing else mattered now.

"Don?"

"No. Go away," Don whispered between sobs.

"Don?"

Don hit at whoever it was calling his name. He just wanted to be left alone, alone to deal with his grief. He couldn't take this right now. How could he when his heart was breaking?

"Don? Wake up."

The hand began to shake him and with a jolt, Don woke up. Charlie looked worriedly at his older brother. He was walking by his brother's old room when he heard Don crying out. Charlie had been scared to find tears pouring down his face. He wondered what Don could have been dreaming about to upset him so badly.

Don wiped his eyes so his vision would be cleared. Like he had thought, it was Charlie sitting in front of him. Without a second thought, Don grabbed his brother in a tight hug, cutting off Charlie's air supply.

"D-Don," Charlie choked out. He didn't mind hugs, but this was painful.

Realizing what he was doing by his brother's choked voice, Don loosened his grip. But he couldn't let go... not yet.

Charlie hugged his brother back, worry etched across his face. Don did not show emotions often. This was more than he'd seen at once before. Charlie had dealt with enough nightmares in his life to recognize that was what Don had been having. However, he didn't know what it was about, but he planned on finding out once his brother calmed down.

"It's okay, Don," Charlie said to comfort his brother. He hoped that Don would be feeling better soon because he was getting really concerned about his brother.

"Thank God you're all right," Don said as he hesitantly let go of his brother. He leaned back and stared at his brother. Charlie was okay. He was alive. But he was so afraid that he'd disappear if he closed his eyes. What if this was the dream? What if Charlie's death was the reality? To make sure Charlie wouldn't leave, Don kept his hand over his brother's.

"Don, what's going on? Are you okay?"

Don shook his head. "It was awful. God, Buddy, I thought I lost you."

Charlie watched his brother fight away emotions before he began to speak again. To give his brother support, Charlie put his other hand over Don's and squeezed. Don gave a small smile of thanks.

"I was going to the hospital to see you. You weren't in your room and neither was Dad. He wasn't in the hotel room either. I went to the nurses' station to ask about you, but they wouldn't tell me anything. Dr. Anderson took me to his office to talk to him. He said... he said I hadn't been there for two days."

Charlie frowned. Not only had he been home for three days, but Don had come to see him every day since his near-death experience. His brother's nightmare was obviously false, but disturbing nonetheless.

"What happened?" Charlie asked to encourage Don to keep talking.

"He... he said you died." Don's voice broke at the end with the word "died." Thinking about his brother dead put daggers through his heart. He couldn't imagine what he really would have done if he had lost Charlie.

Charlie felt his brother's pain. He knew how terrifying it was to think his brother was dead. There had been close calls before, and just plain nightmares that had made Charlie think Don had died. Knowing how terrifying that was, he held onto his brother's hand in a tight, supportive grip.

"Buddy, I... I honestly don't know how I would have gone on without you. It scares me to death just thinking about it. And, and dreaming about it..." Don visibly shuddered.

"I'm okay, Don." Charlie hoped his words would comfort Don. In the past, he had needed that same reassurance. It surprised him how badly the nightmare had affected Don. It warmed Charlie's heart to know how much his brother cared.

"I know." Don looked closely at his brother. When he felt tears prick the corner of his eyes, he hugged his brother, partly to hide the tears and partly to reassure himself that Charlie really was okay.

"I can't lose you, Buddy," Don whispered as he hugged Charlie tightly.

"I know. I can't lose you either." Charlie's eyes began to water at Don's abnormal display of emotions.

"When you were underwater..." Don began, but Charlie cut him off, pushing away from his brother briskly.

"I don't want to talk about that."

His fear was forgotten for the time being when Don heard his brother's tone of voice. Charlie had been struggling ever since Jake's last attack. Don understood coming close to death. But he was surprised that Charlie didn't seem to want to talk about it at all. And it wasn't just with him. His brother wasn't opening up to anyone about it. Don had even sent Megan over to see if she could get something more out of him. But Charlie had kept to himself since coming home and rarely talked to anyone. Hours were spent in the garage, and the rest in his room if he could help it. Don didn't like the way his brother was acting, and hoped he could get more out of him.

"Why not?"

"I don't. That's it! If you're okay, I'm going back to bed."

Charlie stood and started to storm away from his brother. But Don reached out and grasped Charlie's wrist in a gentle grip, stopping him from leaving.

"Let go of me." Charlie fought, but couldn't be freed from Don's grip. "Let go, Don."

"No." Don tightened his hold and pulled Charlie back to his old bed. Charlie deliberately avoided looking at his older brother, angry that he was being forced to stay.

"What is going on with you? Look, I know what happened to you was awful. I understand that, believe me."

Again, Charlie interrupted. He stood quickly and out of his brother's reach. Angrily he shouted at his big brother. "Do you? Do you understand how it feels to conscious as you slowly run out of air? Do you know how it feels to know that you're going to die and then realize it's for nothing?"

"No, but-"

"No! You don't! So I don't even see why we're having this conversation."

This time Charlie managed to get away. He went to his room and made a point of locking the door behind him. He turned his back to the door and sank down to the floor, bringing his knees up to his chest. Charlie felt the tears begging to be released, and this time he let them come pouring down. Don didn't understand. No one did. He thought he was going to die, had known it for certain. The thoughts running through his head were not ones he liked to think back on, but they consumed his mind all the time. It was so hard to move ahead when you had thought you didn't have to anymore. It was so difficult to live with yourself... when you had decided to give up.

Charlie heard Don come to the door and try to open it. He kicked the door, jolting Charlie, but then stomped off to his room. Charlie was glad. He didn't want Don in his room right now. He wanted to be alone.

Charlie had his head down on top of his knees when he heard the banging on his window. Like Don had done before during their childhood, he had gone from his bedroom window to his by the small ledge that connected the windows. Realizing how dangerous that was for a man Don's size, Charlie hurried to the window and let Don in. Heavily, Don fell to the floor.

"You idiot! Do you have any idea how stupid that was?"

Judging by the look of pain across his brother's face, Charlie could see that Don did indeed understand. His brother's ribs were still aching and should not have been pushed like that. Charlie wiped at his eyes, anger taking away the pain briefly.

"I wasn't... done... talking," Don replied breathlessly. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the frame of Charlie's bed as he sat up.

Charlie paced the floor in front of Don, shaking his head in disbelief. This was not what he wanted. He just wanted to be left alone. He'd get through this on his own... though he hadn't yet.

With his breathing back to normal, Don stood and sat on Charlie's bed. He watched his brother pace back and forth and decided now was the time to talk.

"I might not understand exactly what you went through, but don't forget that I was there. I saw you under the water, tied to a chair. I brought you out of the water, and I thought for sure that you were dead. Hell, you were Charlie! You weren't breathing! You went into cardiac arrest. You understand that?"

Charlie's attention turned to his brother, rather than pacing. The anger in Don's voice made him realize that he wasn't the only one with mixed feelings.

"I watched as Janet tried to save your life, _after_ I had already tried. Do you have any idea what _that _feels like? Because I bet you don't."

Don stood and walked up to Charlie so that they were face-to-face. "I _know_ how close you came to dying. I know it's terrifying. So don't think for a second that I don't understand. I was there, Charlie. I know."

Don glared at Charlie for a moment before turning and walking back to his brother's bed. Expecting the retaliation, Don sat down and turned his attention to Charlie. However, he didn't see anger on his little brother's face. Tears began to fall down Charlie's face once more and he looked completely terrified. It was the most emotion he had seen from Charlie since he'd been at the hospital.

"Buddy, what's wrong?" Don softened his voice, trying not to scare his little brother.

"I don't know, Don... One minute, I-I-I was there, and I had a gun out and I thought I'd catch Jake by surprise. The next he had hit me and started tying me to a chair. And, and... right before he pushed me in the water, he told me he lied about saying that he wouldn't hurt you and Dad if I came."

Don nodded in understanding. He had gotten the same message from the video Jake had left.

"If I only known that he was going to kill me, I-I-I would have done more, you know? I would told you and Dad and everyone I love how I really feel about them. I would have done something! But I thought he wouldn't lie to me. I don't know why. It... it was stupid, I know. And then I fought against the ropes around my wrists, but when the pool cover came over me, I-"

"What did you do?" Don asked, wondering why his brother cut himself off.

Charlie released a small sob and turned away from Don. "I stopped fighting."

Don frowned, confused about what his brother meant. "What? You stopped fighting?"

Charlie turned his head to look over his shoulder at Don. He nodded before turning away again. He didn't want to see his brother's face when he told him and he didn't want Don to see his face when he was crying.

"I... I just thought, 'What's the point?' I didn't think it really mattered anymore if I fought. Jake had already won. So... I gave up."

"Charlie, what are you trying to say? That you were suicidal? What?"

Charlie reached up with both hands and grabbed fistfuls of his hair. "I... I don't know! I wish I did, but I don't. I was just so tired of fighting with Jake and dealing with this whole thing. But now, now that I'm okay, I can't believe I did. I mean, I still had you and Dad to fight for, right? I should have fought until I lost consciousness... but I didn't."

Don stood and went to his brother. He took Charlie's shoulders in his hands, forcing his brother to look at him. "You cannot blame yourself what happened that day. You were dying, Charlie! No one acts the same way when they're faced with death like that. It's not normal. Just because you stopped fighting then, when it seemed apparent that you were going to die, that doesn't mean you would have if you thought you would live. Honestly, did you think you were going to live even if you kept fighting?"

Charlie slightly shook his head, but Don still saw it. "See? Buddy, if you know you're gonna die, there's not much point in fighting, is there? Jake was making sure he got the job done this time, and if Janet and I hadn't showed up when we did, he would have succeeded."

Charlie silently reached out and grabbed onto Don's arm. He tilted his head up to meet his brother's eyes and let the terror shine through.

"I almost died, Donny," Charlie whispered, his voice like that of a young child's.

Don nodded. "I know, Buddy."

Gathering his brother to him, Don hugged Charlie tightly. He could hear his little brother's cries, muffled against his shirt. He rubbed circles on Charlie's back as he tried to comfort his brother. He hoped that Charlie could understand that just because he stopped fighting didn't mean he was weak... so maybe he would start believing the same about himself.

Don led Charlie to his bed and the two brothers sat down beside each other. When Charlie's tears were spent, Don licked his lips in a nervous habit. His brother had confessed his true feelings to him. It only seemed fair that Don opened up the same way toward Charlie.

"I... I really do understand where you're coming from when you feel like you should just stop fighting, that you're not doing any good. I felt so... useless when Jake attacked you at that store. I just couldn't see how I was helping anyone or anything. If I can't be a decent big brother and protect you from assholes like Jake, then what good am I doing? That's all I could think of. I shouldn't have let my thoughts go that far, but I did. And I was still on the job. I went into a dangerous situation, with the worst thoughts going through my head. I kept telling myself how worthless and weak I am. And when I got in the line of fire... I did nothing to get out of there. I just stood there. I stopped fighting, Charlie. We both did."

Charlie stared at his brother as he took that information in. He had known all along that there was more to that story than Don told him. Guilt washed over him, knowing that if he hadn't called Don before hand his brother wouldn't have gotten shot. That was the first thought that entered his head.

"I'm sorry."

"What? No, Buddy, that's not what I meant." Don shook his head in frustration. "I'm saying that we all have our moments where we can't fight any longer, where we don't see the point in trying. That doesn't mean we want to end our lives. Everyone has low points. The difference is whether we choose to act on that or not. You fought, but you gave up. I didn't get out of the way when someone was shooting at me. But can you honestly say that if you had survived Jake's attack and gone home that night, you would have put a bullet in your brain? I know I wouldn't have after getting shot at. Sure, I would have felt like hell, but I wasn't trying to intentionally kill myself. We just get pushed so hard that eventually we can't fight any longer. Those were are bad days. That doesn't mean they're going to happen every day, and it sure as hell doesn't mean that we're going to act that way all the time. Understand? I wasn't trying to put the blame on you. I got shot. It happens when you work for the FBI. But I shouldn't have let my thoughts get that far. I shouldn't have allowed myself to think about what a failure I was. It is _not_ the way to go into a dangerous situation because that's how accidents like that happens. I endangered the lives of my team members when they pulled me out of there. I shouldn't have done it. You did not make me do that. It was not your fault, understand?"

Charlie nodded, managing a small smile to reassure Don that he understood. He was glad that his brother had helped him with his feelings about giving up. It had been eating at him for days now. He didn't want to die, he knew that the whole time. But he had questioned whether he would be strong enough to fight on if he was ever in a situation like that again.

"Are you okay?" Don asked, watching his brother closely. He wanted Charlie to understand that he wasn't the only one who felt like giving in. But he also wanted to make sure that Charlie wouldn't give up forever.

Charlie gave a genuine smile. "I'm okay, Don. Thanks." He leaned over and hugged Don, a hug of thanks and brotherly love.

"You're welcome."

Don stood and went to the door, knowing that in a few hours he had to get up for work. He unlocked the door and turned back to Charlie wish a silly grin.

"Didn't think I'd climb to your window, did you?"

"No. You nearly killed yourself in the process." Realizing the irony in that statement, Charlie and Don laughed.

"Good night, little brother."

"Good night, big brother."

With a small wave, Don went back to his room. He hoped that Charlie realized that he was okay now. Or at least he hoped so.

**Okay, this chapter is really short, but the ending has kinda snuck up on me. I thought I was going to have a couple more chapters, but I think I only have one more in me. I didn't want to combine it into one because then it would take a while to update, and I'm already late. So, one more chapter to go and then it's over. :-( I know, it's so sad.**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter and understood what I meant with the suicidal themes. I don't think that Don or Charlie were committing suicide, they were just hitting rock bottom and were too tired of fighting to go on. If you don't understand or disagree, I'm willing to write to you.**

**I'll see you next chapter!**


	24. But It Still Eats At Me

Charlie was surprised the next day to find Janet Waits on his front porch, along with her son Justin. He smiled warmly and let them in.

"I see you're getting better, Justin." The last time he had heard about his condition, the doctors weren't certain he'd pull through. He was happy to see the young man on the mend now.

"Yes, sir. I'm feeling much better." Charlie could see something familiar in Justin's eyes, and realized it was fear.

"I just wanted to see how you're doing, Charlie," Janet said, turning when she saw Alan walking in from the kitchen.

"Oh. I didn't realize we had company. Would you like something to eat or drink?" Alan offered.

"No thank you."

"Dad, this is Janet and Justin Waits."

"I see. I've heard quite a lot about you." Anger flared in Alan's eyes and Charlie was surprised. "Your son was the one who threatened my family, kidnapped my son, tried to kill him and my family. Then you had the nerve to assist some maniac who was a friend of Carl's in catching him. He nearly succeeded in killing my son! You put my son's life at risk..."

Alan paused, emotions flashing in his eyes light a thunder storm. He slowly walked toward Janet, oblivious to his son's wide eyes of surprise staring at him. He continued his rant, but lost all power and anger to his voice. Whispering, Alan spoke once more. "But... I hear you were the one who brought my son back to me... Thank you."

With three pairs of shocked eyes on him, Alan grabbed Janet Waits in a hug. "Thank you," he whispered near her ear.

Janet smiled as she came out of her shocked state and wrapped her arms around Alan. "You're welcome."

After Alan's emotional moment, the three began to catch up and get to know each other more. Justin surprised Charlie with some exciting news.

"I'm going back to school. I've been accepted at CalSci. I was wondering if you could tell me who I should take," Justin began.

"That's wonderful! I'll help you set up a schedule and you can take one of my classes, if you want."

"I'd like that. I... I don't really know anyone there."

"You'll do fine, I'm sure."

Before Janet and Justin left, Janet pulled Charlie aside.

"I... I just wanted to let you know that your brother is a very strong, brave man. He saved your life, and Justin's when he killed Jake. He has nothing to be sorry about, and I'm sure some time with the psychiatrist will do him good. He's a good man. You have a wonderful brother."

Charlie managed a small thank you as Janet hugged him goodbye. He went back to the garage, where he had been working on his cognitive emergence theory. Don was back with the psychiatrist? Why hadn't he heard anything about it?

Slowly Charlie ran the chalk along the board, pondering why Don hadn't told him about going to the psychiatrist. With barely any work done three hours later, the center of his thoughts showed up.

"Hey, Buddy. Working on your cognitive emergence theory?" Don asked, having already known the answer thanks to his father.

"Yeah... I've, uh, been having some trouble with it today."

"Oh? And why's that?"

"I've been thinking..." Don waited for him to continue as he leaned against the air hockey table. Slowly Charlie turned to face Don. "About you."

Don frowned. "Why?"

"Janet and Justin stopped by today."

"I heard. What does that have to do with me, though?" Don thought he missed something.

"Something Janet told me. She... she said that you're back with the psychiatrist. Why? Why didn't you tell me?"

Don rubbed his wrinkled brow. He hoped his brother wouldn't find out about the few times he was required to go to the therapist. He should have known it would have come out somehow.

"It's nothing, Buddy. Merrick is making me do it. He says I was too close to this last case and just wants to make sure that I didn't let my emotions control my trigger."

Charlie looked closely at Don's face, wondering if that was the case. He had never known his brother to let his emotions interfere with his work. But this one hadn't been just any case.

"Did they?" Charlie had never gotten the whole story about what had happened while he was underwater. He knew his brother had saved his life and killed Jake. That was about as much as he knew. He could remember the shadows above him on the pool over, and knew there had been a struggle. But Don hadn't talked about what had really happened, and he hadn't asked.

"No... no they didn't," Don said with only a hint of uncertainty.

Charlie sat on the small table in the garage, across from the air hockey table. "So what did happen?"

Don looked off to the side. His voice was indifferent, but Charlie knew that his brother felt strongly about what had happened. "Janet and I got there, you were underwater, and Jake was walking away from the pool. I held a gun on him, trying to get him to stop. He fought, and I slipped up. He got my gun away from me on the pool cover. I went over to get it, and he did, too. We both reached for the gun, and I got it first. He was ready to strike, so I fired. Janet switched the pool cover and I do in the pool and brought you up... Janet... Janet took over CPR when I, I couldn't anymore. You know the rest."

Charlie didn't get the answer he wanted. No shrink needed to talk to Don, just Charlie. If he could get Don to open up, it would be all right. Don just needed to talk to him.

"Were you scared?"

"Hell, yes I was!" Don said, finally showing emotion in his voice. "I knew you were under there, Charlie. Jake was laughing about it when I got there._ Laughing_! I thought I had already lost you. Then the pool cover went back, and I saw you tied to a chair. You weren't moving. I dove in, and I thought you were already dead. I pulled you out and begged you to be okay. But in my gut, I knew you were dead."

"And in your heart?" Charlie probed, knowing that was not something Don usually listened to.

Don worked his jaw back and forth before answering. "In my heart... I just wanted you to be okay."

Charlie nodded. "And Jake? What did it feel when you fought him? I saw you two on the pool cover. I could see your shadows. I-I didn't understand it to be you at the time. And when I heard you fire the gun, I knew there was a bullet in me." He chuckled softly at his delusions.

"I was so ready to get him. When Janet told me she could take me to him, I lost all thought of anything else. I was just ready to take him out. I don't know, maybe I wanted to get him on my own. I didn't call my own team to come. We could have had him easily. And he'd still be alive." When Charlie's face paled, Don nodded in understanding. "I didn't want that either. I know that bastard deserves punishment for what he's done to you, not just the easy way out with death. But I..."

Don's voice broke and he turned his head downward, so Charlie couldn't see his face. "I couldn't let him have the chance to hurt you again." He looked up at his brother, tears glimmering in his eyes. "I couldn't let that happen. If he got away one more time, I never would have forgiven myself. I had already messed up enough times. I couldn't let him get away. And if he walked away that day alive... I would have been afraid he'd escape from prison, or he'd be released and he'd come after you again. I couldn't live with that, Buddy. I can't watch you go through this again. I can't stand by and watch Jake slowly take away who you are by tormenting you until he kills you. I can't."

Don looked down again because the tears had fallen. Charlie stood from the table and walked over to where his brother stood. He wrapped an arm across his brother's shoulders. He waited until Don had gotten some form of control over his emotions before hitting him with another question.

"So did your emotions drive you to kill him?"

Don looked up and at his brother a moment, then stared straight ahead. "Honestly... I can say no. I might have if I hadn't had the need to, but it was a matter of self defense. If he had the gun, he would have shot me, and we'd both be dead now. I won't lie and say I wasn't happy that I was the one who did it, but I honestly did it because I had to to save us."

Charlie frowned, confused about what his brother had said. He couldn't imagine Don being happy about killing someone. It was the worst feeling Charlie had ever experienced in his life. It still haunted him now. Why would Don be happy about taking another man's life?

"Why are you happy you did it?"

"Because I didn't want you to have to. Charlie, I know how hard it's been for you since you killed Carl. It's not easy killing people. It never gets any better, and you never forget. But I'll handle it. I don't want you to be in a position where you ever have to kill anyone again. Understand?"

Charlie smiled at his brother. It amazed him how much Don took on himself. He was stronger than any other person he knew. Don would take on anyone else's burden if he needed to. And he would do it willingly. Don took on more and more every day. Charlie wondered when his brother would collapse under all the weight he carried.

"I understand." Charlie hugged his brother. He appreciated all Don did for him, and tried to convey it in a hug.

"Thanks, Buddy." Charlie understood that Don meant that it had helped him.

"You're welcome."

Don went back inside and Charlie stayed in the garage. He allowed his thoughts to focus off of his cognitive emergence work and onto what had happened to him. First he had been kidnapped. Then chased into the woods where had had been caught and then escaped once more. Don had found him traumatized in the woods, and he had thought was the end. But then Carl had contacted him. Jake delivered messages to him, some in physical and some just in paper form. Jake had cut him and punched him. Carl had wanted him to meet Jake at a park. The FBI intervened and put Jake behind bars. Carl came after him, ready to kill Alan and Don in front of Charlie. Charlie had attacked Carl back, and unintentionally killed him. He thought that had been the end, too. But then Jake was released on parole and it all began again.

But it was what was between the lines that consumed him as he sat in the garage on the couch. Carl's voice as he asked about Alan and Don and told Charlie just what he could do to them, while Charlie watched. He could have easily killed Charlie without laying a finger on him. The thought of watching his family die was too much. And then Jake promised he wouldn't hurt them if he came to him. Then he realized he was going to die, and Jake surprised him by saying he lied. The fear of knowing his family was still going to die scared the life out of Charlie.

_"You know, I could kill you right now. It would be so easy. You're weak and defenseless. But I have options. Yeah, I've got a lot of options. I could hold you for ransom. I could use you to get whatever I wanted. Sure, the cops would catch me eventually, but I could milk you for all you're worth. But, that would be too easy on you. I could take you and torture you alone. Or, I could get your brother and torture you together. You could watch him hurt, hear him cry out in pain. Then again, I could get your father, too, and torture all three of you together. But the option I like best is I torture and kill your brother and leave you alone. Then you can go home to Dad and tell him how you watched your brother die and how it's all your fault. Also, I could kill them both, set you free. You'd be dead within a day. You'd commit suicide an I wouldn't have to worry about a thing. That'd be one less murder on my hands."_

_"I'm here to fulfill my threat. I can't have you thinking they were just empty threats, could I?"_

_"What do you say we get Daddy in here to join us?" _

_"There's no reason to drag this out, Charlie. I'm going to kill you."_

_"I lied."_

_"Let's see you get out of this one, Eppes!"_

As if inside a ball, Charlie was surrounded by images of Carl and Jake and their words screamed in his mind. He covered his ears, hoping to drown out the noise. It wasn't working. Sweat broke out on his forehead as he breathed hard and fast.

"Stop!" Charlie screamed, barely able to hear himself over Jake and Carl's voices. He saw Don and Alan being killed flash in front of him and he cried out. He had hoped to never see that image again, but it was everywhere. If he closed his eyes, it was there waiting on him. If he tried to sleep, it would chase him down. And now, with his eyes open, it was being played out in front of him.

"Charlie? What's wrong?" Don asked, having heard his brother's scream. He stopped in his tracks when he saw him brother kneeling on the floor of the garage, having fallen off of the couch. He held his hands over his ears and had his eyes shut tightly. "Charlie?" Don repeated, louder this time.

Charlie hear nothing more as Carl and Jake taunted him. "Stop it!" Charlie screamed again, and Don stopped walking, thinking his brother was yelling at him for walking toward him.

Don continued his movements and sat in front of his brother. "Charlie? Charlie!"

Oblivious to his brother's presence, Charlie fought the images away, shaking his head back and forth.

"Charlie!" Don grabbed onto his brother's wrists and shook him, trying to get his brother to focus on him.

Charlie felt something on his arms, but couldn't see it. He pushed at the area in front of him, trying to get the images out of his way. He just wanted to be free. An outline slowly appeared and it came toward him. Instinctively, he knew that it was not a threat. He reached for it, and grabbed onto two muscular arms. It made the noise and images more bearable.

"Please, stop," Charlie begged. He didn't want this. He wanted to be better. It was all over. Why couldn't his mind understand that, too?

"Charlie... Charlie."

It started out as quiet as a whisper, but now Charlie heard his brother clearly. He opened his eyes and the images evaporated. All that was left now was the sight of his big brother looking worriedly at him.

"Charlie?" Don realized his brother could see him by the focus of his eyes.

"Donny?"

Don smiled. "The one and only."

Charlie smiled in return, but it vanished quickly. He shivered at the memory of the images that flashed in his mind, what had happened and how they had affected him. He hated it. He didn't want to feel this way.

"Buddy, what just happened? Are you all right?"

"I'm okay... now."

"What happened?"

Charlie looked up at Don with solemn eyes. "I don't really know. I was just thinking about all that's happened, starting with when Carl kidnapped me. And I guess... it just became too much. I could hear their voices in my head." He shivered again when he thought of what they told him. "And, and images flashed in front of me of the worst moments. I... I saw you and Dad get killed again."

A cry escaped his lips and Don moved closer to his brother. "It's okay, Buddy."

Charlie wasn't as sure. He looked up at Don and felt the tears about to fall. "Am I going to always be like this, Don? Am I going to be afraid of my shadow? Will I have these panic attacks every time I think about what happened? Am I going to hear their voices in my head? Are they going to haunt my every step? When does it end, Don? When I die? Or is there just another one around the corner waiting to take Jake and Carl's place? Who now? I can't go through this again, Don."

Charlie let the tears come and pressed closer to Don. His brother held him close with one hand and rubbed his back with the other. Making sure his brother heard him, Don waited until Charlie's cries softened before answering his brother's multiple questions.

"I think you're a strong, courageous man. You took whatever like threw at you and survived each blow that hit you. You've been dealt a heck of a time, but you're here. You made it. You made it to the end, Charlie. _The end._ There can't be any more. You have to believe that. There are always hard times, and you have to expect them. But you can't go through life thinking everyone is a Jake or Carl, because they aren't. You may be scared still now, but that's understandable. You'll be better, I promise. Because you're an Eppes. We Eppes men push through and survive whatever life throws at us. It's okay to think about what happened and still be scared. Hell, I am when I think about it. That's what happens when assholes like Jake and Carl threaten your life. Don't let the fear win. This is the last battle you have to face, and if you let it win now, the rest will have been for nothing."

Charlie listened to his brother's words. He knew Don was right, and somehow, he knew that the panic attack he'd just had would be his last. The fear would remain a while, but that only made sense. But he would make it. He had one last fight left in him, and he'd use it on this. Then things would be different, better. He knew it.

"Do you have that fight in you, Charlie?" Don asked, smiling because he saw the glow in his brother's eyes that told him he had it in him.

"Yeah. Yeah, I do."

**Awwwwwww. It's all over. No trilogy here, sorry. I have lots of one-shot ideas and one small story idea and then I'll get into my next long story. Okay? I'm sorry it took so long to update this small ending, but I've been on vacation. I have my laptop, and am writing this on the way home. So please forgive any weird mistakes. LOL I hope you all enjoyed reading this story as much as I did writing it. Thank you all for your encouragement, help, and comments. I love hearing from you! You're all awesome.**

**Here is the final poem. I almost made it to all the chapters I needed. LOL The last two lines are new. Enjoy!**

**Release Your Hold**

**My past takes hold**

**Of my mind so tight**

**Regret chokes me**

**And I can't put up a fight**

**What you did haunts me**

**It never leaves me alone**

**Your voice is in my head**

**And it chills me to the bone**

**I can't live without fear**

**Thanks to you**

**I'm not strong enough**

**To make it through**

**What I did was a mistake**

**I'm not sorry, though**

**Your plan was to kill me**

**So how could I let you go**

**I try to hide what I feel**

**From those who matter most**

**I don't want them to know**

**That I'm haunted by your ghost**

**So I take it all on myself**

**And fight away the fear**

**But it still eats at me**

**Because you're still here**

**'Til next time...**

**The End**


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